How to Fix a Marriage

Write down how you feel., Work on what you can fix., Commit to improving your marriage., Consider seeing a marriage counselor.

4 Steps 2 min read Medium

Step-by-Step Guide

  1. Step 1: Write down how you feel.

    While you might want to dive into the issues and what is wrong in your marriage, you won't really be able to know this until you speak with your partner.

    You should first identify how you feel and then why you feel that way.

    Write down the feeling (angry, distant, hurt, etc.) and then attribute the feeling to a pattern of interacting (you don't talk with your spouse about work anymore, you stopped date night, etc.).

    When you are ready to talk to your spouse you can refer to this list.
  2. Step 2: Work on what you can fix.

    Trying to force another person to behave differently will likely be met with resistance.

    Instead, focus on your own issues and work towards becoming a better person yourself.

    Understanding, loving, and improving yourself can help you improve your marriage in turn.Communicate the changes you will make to your partner so you can be on the same page about them.

    Changing your own behaviors is easier than changing someone else's.

    Work towards dropping negative behaviors or angry reactions and replace them with calm and constructive responses.

    Carefully and honestly examine any personal problems that might be affecting your marriage and work to address them. , Lack of commitment is one of the most common reasons cited for divorce.

    Finding a reason to stay committed and being dedicated to making your marriage work can help make your bond stronger.

    Try to establish and maintain a sense of “we” that you can both work towards building and strengthening.Remember good times and focus on those aspects.

    Plan and discuss your dreams for your future together.

    Commitment should come from both partners. , If you are unsure of how or what you can do to improve your marriage, but are dedicated to the cause, consider seeing a marriage counselor.

    These professionals can help you both work together to find what issues need addressing and how best to approach them.Marriage counselors are there to help.

    Don't be afraid or embarrassed to see one if both partners agree to.

    Marriage counselors may also by found by searching for “couples therapy”.

    Marriage counseling is a form of psychotherapy done by a licensed therapist.

    In some cases, marriage counseling can be done with only one of the partners present.
  3. Step 3: Commit to improving your marriage.

  4. Step 4: Consider seeing a marriage counselor.

Detailed Guide

While you might want to dive into the issues and what is wrong in your marriage, you won't really be able to know this until you speak with your partner.

You should first identify how you feel and then why you feel that way.

Write down the feeling (angry, distant, hurt, etc.) and then attribute the feeling to a pattern of interacting (you don't talk with your spouse about work anymore, you stopped date night, etc.).

When you are ready to talk to your spouse you can refer to this list.

Trying to force another person to behave differently will likely be met with resistance.

Instead, focus on your own issues and work towards becoming a better person yourself.

Understanding, loving, and improving yourself can help you improve your marriage in turn.Communicate the changes you will make to your partner so you can be on the same page about them.

Changing your own behaviors is easier than changing someone else's.

Work towards dropping negative behaviors or angry reactions and replace them with calm and constructive responses.

Carefully and honestly examine any personal problems that might be affecting your marriage and work to address them. , Lack of commitment is one of the most common reasons cited for divorce.

Finding a reason to stay committed and being dedicated to making your marriage work can help make your bond stronger.

Try to establish and maintain a sense of “we” that you can both work towards building and strengthening.Remember good times and focus on those aspects.

Plan and discuss your dreams for your future together.

Commitment should come from both partners. , If you are unsure of how or what you can do to improve your marriage, but are dedicated to the cause, consider seeing a marriage counselor.

These professionals can help you both work together to find what issues need addressing and how best to approach them.Marriage counselors are there to help.

Don't be afraid or embarrassed to see one if both partners agree to.

Marriage counselors may also by found by searching for “couples therapy”.

Marriage counseling is a form of psychotherapy done by a licensed therapist.

In some cases, marriage counseling can be done with only one of the partners present.

About the Author

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Hannah Johnson

Experienced content creator specializing in creative arts guides and tutorials.

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