How to Avoid Showing Favoritism As a Parent

Treat each child according to their individual needs., Involve yourself with each child individually., Talk to your children about their needs., Forgive blunders.

4 Steps 3 min read Medium

Step-by-Step Guide

  1. Step 1: Treat each child according to their individual needs.

    In most cases, being fair to multiple children (or people in general) does not mean doing exactly the same thing for each.

    Instead, focus on meeting each child’s needs to the best of your abilities, and spread your energy and resources as best you can between your children.

    You will help each child develop a healthy relationship with you and their siblings and grow into a happy adult.For example, if you have one child that excels in math and one that doesn’t, you wouldn’t hire both of them a math tutor.

    Instead, you would hire one a math tutor to help out and provide the other with resources needed specifically for them.
  2. Step 2: Involve yourself with each child individually.

    Being involved with each child has a range of benefits for parents.

    It allows you to pinpoint the needs of each child and deliver them.

    It also makes each child feel special and loved equally.

    In addition, having regular time with each child will help you grow closer to your children.For example, you could choose one activity each week that you do with each child.

    For example, you could play catch, watch a movie, go bike riding, take a walk, etc. depending on what each individual child likes to do.

    Also try rotating between an activity one child prefers each week and get their siblings to participate with the condition that they will get to do an activity they prefer in the future.

    This will show siblings that they are equally valued and help them to value each other as well. , Parents often know intuitively what their children need.

    Even so, giving them the opportunity to tell you can help them feel valued and loved.

    Allow each child to tell you what their needs are, and do your best to discuss those needs and deliver on ones that are reasonable.Start getting into this habit by inquiring each day about how each child’s day went equally while genuinely listening to what they have to say.

    For example, if your child says that they need your support to get to and from an extracurricular, you can give them a ride or provide them public transportation.

    However, if your child requests their own sports car to drive back and forth to the same event, you might be less inclined to oblige. , Children are in the process of learning who they are and how they fit into the world.

    This inevitably leads to mistakes.

    Even when you have to address inappropriate behaviors in your children, forgive the incident after it has been handled.

    This lets you start each day equally with each child instead of harboring resentment from past missteps.For example, if one child is notorious for being rude, you should address the situation each time it comes up, but then let it go.

    If you hold onto the frustration, it can cause you to distance yourself from that child or to be harsher than you are with your other children.
  3. Step 3: Talk to your children about their needs.

  4. Step 4: Forgive blunders.

Detailed Guide

In most cases, being fair to multiple children (or people in general) does not mean doing exactly the same thing for each.

Instead, focus on meeting each child’s needs to the best of your abilities, and spread your energy and resources as best you can between your children.

You will help each child develop a healthy relationship with you and their siblings and grow into a happy adult.For example, if you have one child that excels in math and one that doesn’t, you wouldn’t hire both of them a math tutor.

Instead, you would hire one a math tutor to help out and provide the other with resources needed specifically for them.

Being involved with each child has a range of benefits for parents.

It allows you to pinpoint the needs of each child and deliver them.

It also makes each child feel special and loved equally.

In addition, having regular time with each child will help you grow closer to your children.For example, you could choose one activity each week that you do with each child.

For example, you could play catch, watch a movie, go bike riding, take a walk, etc. depending on what each individual child likes to do.

Also try rotating between an activity one child prefers each week and get their siblings to participate with the condition that they will get to do an activity they prefer in the future.

This will show siblings that they are equally valued and help them to value each other as well. , Parents often know intuitively what their children need.

Even so, giving them the opportunity to tell you can help them feel valued and loved.

Allow each child to tell you what their needs are, and do your best to discuss those needs and deliver on ones that are reasonable.Start getting into this habit by inquiring each day about how each child’s day went equally while genuinely listening to what they have to say.

For example, if your child says that they need your support to get to and from an extracurricular, you can give them a ride or provide them public transportation.

However, if your child requests their own sports car to drive back and forth to the same event, you might be less inclined to oblige. , Children are in the process of learning who they are and how they fit into the world.

This inevitably leads to mistakes.

Even when you have to address inappropriate behaviors in your children, forgive the incident after it has been handled.

This lets you start each day equally with each child instead of harboring resentment from past missteps.For example, if one child is notorious for being rude, you should address the situation each time it comes up, but then let it go.

If you hold onto the frustration, it can cause you to distance yourself from that child or to be harsher than you are with your other children.

About the Author

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Brittany Barnes

Enthusiastic about teaching crafts techniques through clear, step-by-step guides.

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