How to Deal with Insensitive Remarks During Pregnancy
Be straightforward., Try humor., Stop them., Remind them of personal boundaries.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Be straightforward.
One way to deal with the problem is to face it head-on.
If someone says something you don't like, tell them.
You can also tell them why it is you don't like it if you want, or you can just leave it at telling them you don't appreciate the comment.For example, if someone says, "Wow, you're enormous," you could respond with, "I am not comfortable with comments like that.
I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't say them." A statement like this, while effective, may lead to some awkwardness or tension.
Quickly diffuse that by moving the conversation along to something else.
For instance, "Oh, did you see that story on the front page of the paper this morning?" -
Step 2: Try humor.
To address a comment in a less confrontational way, try making a joke in response.
It helps diffuse the tension of the situation while still letting the person know that the comment wasn't exactly okay with you.For instance, if someone says, "Wow, you're huge," you could say, "Well, I am pregnant.
That's generally what happens." Be aware that this approach may minimize tension and awkwardness, but it may not get the point across to the person that their comment was inappropriate. , If the person starts going into a long, drawn-out labor story that you don't want to hear, go ahead and interrupt them.
Likely, the person will understand once they think about it, and you shouldn't have to listen to something that makes you uncomfortable.You could say, "I hate to interrupt, but I'm already nervous.
I'd rather not hear a birth horror story."
For some reason, pregnancy makes people throw personal boundaries out the window.
That's true of both social and physical boundaries, and you have a right to remind the person of that if they cross those lines.For example, if the person touches your belly without asking, you could say, "I know you're excited, but I'd rather not be touched without my permission." Alternatively, if they ask you something too personal, such as if you used fertility treatments to get pregnant, you could say, "That's a very personal question to me, and I'd like to keep it between me and my partner." -
Step 3: Stop them.
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Step 4: Remind them of personal boundaries.
Detailed Guide
One way to deal with the problem is to face it head-on.
If someone says something you don't like, tell them.
You can also tell them why it is you don't like it if you want, or you can just leave it at telling them you don't appreciate the comment.For example, if someone says, "Wow, you're enormous," you could respond with, "I am not comfortable with comments like that.
I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't say them." A statement like this, while effective, may lead to some awkwardness or tension.
Quickly diffuse that by moving the conversation along to something else.
For instance, "Oh, did you see that story on the front page of the paper this morning?"
To address a comment in a less confrontational way, try making a joke in response.
It helps diffuse the tension of the situation while still letting the person know that the comment wasn't exactly okay with you.For instance, if someone says, "Wow, you're huge," you could say, "Well, I am pregnant.
That's generally what happens." Be aware that this approach may minimize tension and awkwardness, but it may not get the point across to the person that their comment was inappropriate. , If the person starts going into a long, drawn-out labor story that you don't want to hear, go ahead and interrupt them.
Likely, the person will understand once they think about it, and you shouldn't have to listen to something that makes you uncomfortable.You could say, "I hate to interrupt, but I'm already nervous.
I'd rather not hear a birth horror story."
For some reason, pregnancy makes people throw personal boundaries out the window.
That's true of both social and physical boundaries, and you have a right to remind the person of that if they cross those lines.For example, if the person touches your belly without asking, you could say, "I know you're excited, but I'd rather not be touched without my permission." Alternatively, if they ask you something too personal, such as if you used fertility treatments to get pregnant, you could say, "That's a very personal question to me, and I'd like to keep it between me and my partner."
About the Author
Peter Stewart
Specializes in breaking down complex hobbies topics into simple steps.
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