How to Discipline Toddlers Using Distraction
Prevent the unwanted behavior., Remove your toddler., Trade with your older toddler., Give them something else to do., Offer a new toy, object or person to interact with., Choose toys that stimulate your toddler.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Prevent the unwanted behavior.
Preventing the unwanted behavior before it starts avoids the problem in the first place.
Distract your toddler when you notice them heading for something that's out of bounds For example, if your toddler is walking over towards the cords behind your mother's entertainment center, get your toddler to play with you in another room.
Living spaces with young children need to be designed with safety in mind.
This means things like safeguarding electrical outlets, securing furniture and screens on walls, and keeping potentially hazardous objects (lamps, medications, scissors) out of the reach (and climbing ability) of young children. -
Step 2: Remove your toddler.
Your toddler may not stop handling the item or stop the unwanted behavior on their own.
You will need to step in and remove your toddler from the situation or take the item away.
At this point, your toddler will probably be very upset, but better upset than in danger.
They will get over it quickly too.
Tell your child no firmly but gently and immediately remove the item.
In time, your child will recognize what no in this situation means.
It is OK to add a short explanation, ("Hot!" "That's not food!" "Ouchie!").
Do not expect the toddler to always respond to "no" but it is a start.
Do not get upset at the young child while removing them from the situation.
The youngster is simply being a curious child, as he or she is supposed to.
He or she does not understand why it is OK one moment to explore and not OK the next and that is frustrating. , This is a technique that can distract and redirect your child.
Older toddlers often love exchanging one item for another, especially for something that seems intrinsically better.
The child needs to have some experience with what "trade" means (I give you something and you give me something) for this to work.Example:
Alonzo (aged 2 1/2) finds a pair of scissors.
His father gets a strawberry, comes up to him, and asks, "Trade?" Alonzo nods happily and hands his father the scissors. , Older toddlers can be easily redirected by asking them to do something for you.
Have a simple task they can do easily.
It can be a make work task and not something that actually needs done.
Good tasks include: "Get daddy's cell phone," "Find my purse," and "Let's feed the cat."You can have them bring you a book, stack blocks, or put clothes into a hamper.
Try modelling the behavior physically, so your child knows what you are asking them to do.
Remember that just words alone are not as effective as words and actions.
For example:
Sonya (aged 18 months) is throwing toys out of frustration.
Her sitter says, "Hey Sonya, let's get your coat and go outside.
I'm going to the door to get my coat.
See me put on my coat? Now you get on your coat." Sonya sees her sitter and follows her on this more interesting thing to do. , Set out baskets or containers full of items to distract your toddler.
This way, you can quickly grab a toy or object to hand to your toddler, if they begin to play with something that's off limits.
Try to offer toys that your child doesn't always have access to.
You can also rotate out toys, so your child can play with a familiar toy that they haven't seen in a while.
Try distracting your toddler by doing something unexpected.
You can sing, do a puppet show, or anything that's not startling or scary. , Try to have several items or toys that your toddler could be curious about.
These don't need to be toys.
You could offer items that have different textures, items that stack, or materials they can use to create something.
Keep a few of these items on hand to distract:
Beads in a variety of sizes Cloths with different textures Pom poms and pipe cleaners A small jar filled with dry noodles to shake Measuring cups or spoons to stack -
Step 3: Trade with your older toddler.
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Step 4: Give them something else to do.
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Step 5: Offer a new toy
-
Step 6: object or person to interact with.
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Step 7: Choose toys that stimulate your toddler.
Detailed Guide
Preventing the unwanted behavior before it starts avoids the problem in the first place.
Distract your toddler when you notice them heading for something that's out of bounds For example, if your toddler is walking over towards the cords behind your mother's entertainment center, get your toddler to play with you in another room.
Living spaces with young children need to be designed with safety in mind.
This means things like safeguarding electrical outlets, securing furniture and screens on walls, and keeping potentially hazardous objects (lamps, medications, scissors) out of the reach (and climbing ability) of young children.
Your toddler may not stop handling the item or stop the unwanted behavior on their own.
You will need to step in and remove your toddler from the situation or take the item away.
At this point, your toddler will probably be very upset, but better upset than in danger.
They will get over it quickly too.
Tell your child no firmly but gently and immediately remove the item.
In time, your child will recognize what no in this situation means.
It is OK to add a short explanation, ("Hot!" "That's not food!" "Ouchie!").
Do not expect the toddler to always respond to "no" but it is a start.
Do not get upset at the young child while removing them from the situation.
The youngster is simply being a curious child, as he or she is supposed to.
He or she does not understand why it is OK one moment to explore and not OK the next and that is frustrating. , This is a technique that can distract and redirect your child.
Older toddlers often love exchanging one item for another, especially for something that seems intrinsically better.
The child needs to have some experience with what "trade" means (I give you something and you give me something) for this to work.Example:
Alonzo (aged 2 1/2) finds a pair of scissors.
His father gets a strawberry, comes up to him, and asks, "Trade?" Alonzo nods happily and hands his father the scissors. , Older toddlers can be easily redirected by asking them to do something for you.
Have a simple task they can do easily.
It can be a make work task and not something that actually needs done.
Good tasks include: "Get daddy's cell phone," "Find my purse," and "Let's feed the cat."You can have them bring you a book, stack blocks, or put clothes into a hamper.
Try modelling the behavior physically, so your child knows what you are asking them to do.
Remember that just words alone are not as effective as words and actions.
For example:
Sonya (aged 18 months) is throwing toys out of frustration.
Her sitter says, "Hey Sonya, let's get your coat and go outside.
I'm going to the door to get my coat.
See me put on my coat? Now you get on your coat." Sonya sees her sitter and follows her on this more interesting thing to do. , Set out baskets or containers full of items to distract your toddler.
This way, you can quickly grab a toy or object to hand to your toddler, if they begin to play with something that's off limits.
Try to offer toys that your child doesn't always have access to.
You can also rotate out toys, so your child can play with a familiar toy that they haven't seen in a while.
Try distracting your toddler by doing something unexpected.
You can sing, do a puppet show, or anything that's not startling or scary. , Try to have several items or toys that your toddler could be curious about.
These don't need to be toys.
You could offer items that have different textures, items that stack, or materials they can use to create something.
Keep a few of these items on hand to distract:
Beads in a variety of sizes Cloths with different textures Pom poms and pipe cleaners A small jar filled with dry noodles to shake Measuring cups or spoons to stack
About the Author
Denise Williams
Committed to making DIY projects accessible and understandable for everyone.
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