How to Help a Child Overcome a Fear of Monsters

Affirm their feelings., Ask them what they are worried about., Help them find the facts of their fears., Have them draw the monster and make it silly., Reassure them of their safety if they leave their bedroom., Help your child address and move past...

7 Steps 4 min read Medium

Step-by-Step Guide

  1. Step 1: Affirm their feelings.

    One of the most helpful points in helping your child move past their fear is acknowledging that the fear exists.

    Rather than saying things like “Don’t be scared” or “You shouldn’t worry,” you should acknowledge your child’s anxiety so that they feel heard.Say something like “I know that you are scared, honey.

    I’m going to help you, I promise.”
  2. Step 2: Ask them what they are worried about.

    Don’t guess or make any assumptions about why your child is scared.

    Instead, seek to understand through actively listening to them.

    You might say something like “Tell me what’s bothering you the most.” It is only once you understand their fear that you can help them overcome it.Active listening involves more than simply asking your child what's bothering them.

    Sit down or kneel to get on their level, and make eye contact as they describe their fears.

    This lets them know you take their concerns seriously. , Though you know that your child’s fears are unreasonable, to them they are very real.

    Help them break down the realities of the situation.

    After finding out their fears, ask them questions.

    For instance, if they are worried that a monster is hiding in their closet, ask them if they have ever seen one in there.If they are afraid of their dolls at night, ask them if they have ever seen one of their dolls move on their own.

    This will help jumpstart the process of delegitimizing their worries.

    Very young children may not be as receptive to being told monsters are not real.

    You may need to help a young child feel ready to take on the threat of a monster.

    By age six or seven, though, you should be able to speak clearly with your child about fact versus fiction. , Another way to help debunk their fears is to assign them a mini art project.

    Have them draw what they think their monster might look like.

    After they have done that, have them make the monster look silly by adding polka dots or ice skates or anything else that is funny to them.

    This will help assuage their fears by adding humor to the idea of the monster.Perhaps they could draw them slipping on a banana peel.

    You may also have them write a silly story about their monster, or tell them a story that makes their monster seem like less of a threat. , Sometimes, your child might feel so afraid at night that they will leave their beds to get in yours.

    Though it can be tempting to allow them to sleep with you, it is important that you reinforce that their room is a safe place and that they should be sleeping there.

    Walk them back to their bed and stay for a bit until they fall asleep.You might say something like “Honey, I know you are scared.

    But your room is a safe place and it is okay for you to sleep there.

    I won’t let anything get you.

    I’m going to stay with you for a little bit until you fall asleep, okay?” , Perhaps your child’s fear of monsters stems from some very real traumatic life situation that has occurred.

    Maybe your home was broken into or they witnessed a violent act.

    Whatever the cause, help your child move past their issue through conversation and making changes to your home environment.You might begin the conversation by saying “Honey, I know you are still scared from seeing that fight yesterday.

    We can talk about it any time you want to.

    Do you want to talk about it now?” You may also ask your child, "What would help you feel less afraid?" They may be able to direct you to a practical answer if asked outright.

    If they are afraid because of a burglar, consider purchasing a home alarm system and explaining to them how it works and keeps bad people out.

    Lock your windows and doors.

    Get a guard dog. , Sometimes, your child’s fear of monsters might be beyond the scope of just having a conversation or tweaking their nighttime routine.

    If your child is not sleeping at night, eating less, or if you observe any signs of depression, consider getting them professional help.

    Look up child therapists in your area.
  3. Step 3: Help them find the facts of their fears.

  4. Step 4: Have them draw the monster and make it silly.

  5. Step 5: Reassure them of their safety if they leave their bedroom.

  6. Step 6: Help your child address and move past actual trauma.

  7. Step 7: Get professional help in severe cases.

Detailed Guide

One of the most helpful points in helping your child move past their fear is acknowledging that the fear exists.

Rather than saying things like “Don’t be scared” or “You shouldn’t worry,” you should acknowledge your child’s anxiety so that they feel heard.Say something like “I know that you are scared, honey.

I’m going to help you, I promise.”

Don’t guess or make any assumptions about why your child is scared.

Instead, seek to understand through actively listening to them.

You might say something like “Tell me what’s bothering you the most.” It is only once you understand their fear that you can help them overcome it.Active listening involves more than simply asking your child what's bothering them.

Sit down or kneel to get on their level, and make eye contact as they describe their fears.

This lets them know you take their concerns seriously. , Though you know that your child’s fears are unreasonable, to them they are very real.

Help them break down the realities of the situation.

After finding out their fears, ask them questions.

For instance, if they are worried that a monster is hiding in their closet, ask them if they have ever seen one in there.If they are afraid of their dolls at night, ask them if they have ever seen one of their dolls move on their own.

This will help jumpstart the process of delegitimizing their worries.

Very young children may not be as receptive to being told monsters are not real.

You may need to help a young child feel ready to take on the threat of a monster.

By age six or seven, though, you should be able to speak clearly with your child about fact versus fiction. , Another way to help debunk their fears is to assign them a mini art project.

Have them draw what they think their monster might look like.

After they have done that, have them make the monster look silly by adding polka dots or ice skates or anything else that is funny to them.

This will help assuage their fears by adding humor to the idea of the monster.Perhaps they could draw them slipping on a banana peel.

You may also have them write a silly story about their monster, or tell them a story that makes their monster seem like less of a threat. , Sometimes, your child might feel so afraid at night that they will leave their beds to get in yours.

Though it can be tempting to allow them to sleep with you, it is important that you reinforce that their room is a safe place and that they should be sleeping there.

Walk them back to their bed and stay for a bit until they fall asleep.You might say something like “Honey, I know you are scared.

But your room is a safe place and it is okay for you to sleep there.

I won’t let anything get you.

I’m going to stay with you for a little bit until you fall asleep, okay?” , Perhaps your child’s fear of monsters stems from some very real traumatic life situation that has occurred.

Maybe your home was broken into or they witnessed a violent act.

Whatever the cause, help your child move past their issue through conversation and making changes to your home environment.You might begin the conversation by saying “Honey, I know you are still scared from seeing that fight yesterday.

We can talk about it any time you want to.

Do you want to talk about it now?” You may also ask your child, "What would help you feel less afraid?" They may be able to direct you to a practical answer if asked outright.

If they are afraid because of a burglar, consider purchasing a home alarm system and explaining to them how it works and keeps bad people out.

Lock your windows and doors.

Get a guard dog. , Sometimes, your child’s fear of monsters might be beyond the scope of just having a conversation or tweaking their nighttime routine.

If your child is not sleeping at night, eating less, or if you observe any signs of depression, consider getting them professional help.

Look up child therapists in your area.

About the Author

C

Charlotte Peterson

A passionate writer with expertise in hobbies topics. Loves sharing practical knowledge.

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