How to Raise Spiritually Fit Teens
Be congruent—if you believe something, then speak of those things often and then do those things., Teach them the tenets of your faith early (as soon as the child can speak), and not just when they go to the places where these ideas are taught, but...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Be congruent—if you believe something
Let your teens see you behaving in ways that equal your belief.
For example if love and acceptance is what guides you spiritually then you must not just talk a good game, you’ve got to live the game.
Sometimes you have to “play” the game.
In other words, you have got to make extra efforts to allow you teen to hear and see you doing what you believe.
For instance, when one of their friends gets caught skipping school, you have got to be there with some response at sounds understanding.
Like, “What got into Mike; he is not that kind of kid at all.” -
Step 2: then speak of those things often and then do those things.
Look for teachable moments in every situation.
Then quiz them on what they know.
Ask question like: “Jon what do you believe about God?” When he answers, ask him why he believe that.
If he is unclear on some area, then clear him up and then quiz him on his clarity.
Note: you are doing this in a light now threatening way.
Accept whatever answer he gives, making sense of what he says.
Remember the only way you can have this conversation is that Jon feels no condemnation from you, so be sweet.
Remember, your teen has been listening and watching out for about 13-years.
Depending on how well you showed yourself to be spiritual, you will have an easy time getting him to join you in these conversations. , You do not want anyone else to be this primary in your child’s life, as you know what you “ideally” want him or her to embody when it comes to spiritual things.
Primarily, you want to make the first impression, letting your child know that spiritual things are important in life.
Then you want to set the proper foundation, so that yours is the one that your teen measures everyone else’s by.
The way to check out what others are teaching is to ask your teen what they learned at your place of spirituality.
I always asked my children this question.
When I did not agree with what they were told, I would not dispute what they were told, but I would add to it, giving it my own spend and allowing for more flexibility in my son or daughter’s understanding. , Always do your best to speak of others in a positive light.
You want to model what it means to be gracious, forgiving, accepting and loving.
For one, you will want these attributes to be directed to you from your teen, so you want to show them how it’s done.
Also, you don’t want to give them the impression that anyone, including you, is without faults.
This is especially true for spiritual leaders.
Never do you want to give them the impression that these men and women are any more “holy” than any other human being (check out the news).
However the best way to show grace is by the way you respond to them when they break some house rule or misbehaves at school.
You want to show them what loving and accepting looks like.
Discipline does not have to be without a heart.
So discipline your child, but do it without unnecessary cruelty—abusive, degrading talk or taunting. , Your teen may find a way to be spiritual that is different from yours.
Give her or him space to do that.
Acceptance is a spiritual value that crosses all lines of beliefs.
The last thing you want to do is to show a lack of respect for someone else’s personal spiritual walk.
Even if your beliefs are that your teen’s ideas will lead his or her certain demise, you want to share your difference (which he or she already knows remember, but if you must tell them again) and respectfully accept her or his.
Trust me, the quickest way to lose your teen to some “radial” idea forever is to show lack of respect and honor for his/her beliefs.
Recently, a friend of mine shared with me that she asked her 16-year-old son about his spiritual beliefs.
The first thing he said was that he did not want tell her because she would not agree—he knew what beliefs were.
But she insisted that she would not be upset.
When he told her, she respectfully asked, “Tell me about it?” , In other words, you are not going to church, temple, synagogue, mosque; or do you pray, chant, or meditate because you have to, but because you want to.
You want your teen to know that these practices are self-enhancing and you do them for those reasons.
Further, your teen needs to know that you worship or practice the way you do because of your own personal or inner convictions, not because you fear rejection or ostracizing.
It is important that your teen know that your beliefs come from within and that you would practice as you do no matter what anyone else around you practices or believes.
Your inner convictions will be a sign of your devotion as an inner strength. , You must embody your beliefs, so that you don’t have to practice them, they are apart of your thought processes and they influence your every move.
Whether at work, at school, at home, in the community, with friends, children, or adults your spirituality shows up in every thing you do. “Being” is what will make it easier to show your teen how to be.
You are still and will always be the most influential person in your teen’s life.
So be spiritual and respect them as spiritual beings and you will raise teens that are spiritually healthy too. , Make being part of a family of believers important.
Your kids will benefit from the connections of that community.
Develop a network of accountability with other in your church.
By establishing a strong link with a family of believers we anchor there sense of beliefs. -
Step 3: Teach them the tenets of your faith early (as soon as the child can speak)
-
Step 4: and not just when they go to the places where these ideas are taught
-
Step 5: but teach them at home
-
Step 6: in the car
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Step 7: on the playground
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Step 8: and when something significant happens.
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Step 9: Be the primary teacher of all things spiritual.
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Step 10: Be positive when speaking about others (especially spiritual “authority” figures.
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Step 11: Leave space for difference.
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Step 12: Remind them often that the rituals that go with your belief are not mandatory.
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Step 13: Keep your spiritual beliefs as a part of your very being.
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Step 14: Demonstrate your faith in your own life.
Detailed Guide
Let your teens see you behaving in ways that equal your belief.
For example if love and acceptance is what guides you spiritually then you must not just talk a good game, you’ve got to live the game.
Sometimes you have to “play” the game.
In other words, you have got to make extra efforts to allow you teen to hear and see you doing what you believe.
For instance, when one of their friends gets caught skipping school, you have got to be there with some response at sounds understanding.
Like, “What got into Mike; he is not that kind of kid at all.”
Look for teachable moments in every situation.
Then quiz them on what they know.
Ask question like: “Jon what do you believe about God?” When he answers, ask him why he believe that.
If he is unclear on some area, then clear him up and then quiz him on his clarity.
Note: you are doing this in a light now threatening way.
Accept whatever answer he gives, making sense of what he says.
Remember the only way you can have this conversation is that Jon feels no condemnation from you, so be sweet.
Remember, your teen has been listening and watching out for about 13-years.
Depending on how well you showed yourself to be spiritual, you will have an easy time getting him to join you in these conversations. , You do not want anyone else to be this primary in your child’s life, as you know what you “ideally” want him or her to embody when it comes to spiritual things.
Primarily, you want to make the first impression, letting your child know that spiritual things are important in life.
Then you want to set the proper foundation, so that yours is the one that your teen measures everyone else’s by.
The way to check out what others are teaching is to ask your teen what they learned at your place of spirituality.
I always asked my children this question.
When I did not agree with what they were told, I would not dispute what they were told, but I would add to it, giving it my own spend and allowing for more flexibility in my son or daughter’s understanding. , Always do your best to speak of others in a positive light.
You want to model what it means to be gracious, forgiving, accepting and loving.
For one, you will want these attributes to be directed to you from your teen, so you want to show them how it’s done.
Also, you don’t want to give them the impression that anyone, including you, is without faults.
This is especially true for spiritual leaders.
Never do you want to give them the impression that these men and women are any more “holy” than any other human being (check out the news).
However the best way to show grace is by the way you respond to them when they break some house rule or misbehaves at school.
You want to show them what loving and accepting looks like.
Discipline does not have to be without a heart.
So discipline your child, but do it without unnecessary cruelty—abusive, degrading talk or taunting. , Your teen may find a way to be spiritual that is different from yours.
Give her or him space to do that.
Acceptance is a spiritual value that crosses all lines of beliefs.
The last thing you want to do is to show a lack of respect for someone else’s personal spiritual walk.
Even if your beliefs are that your teen’s ideas will lead his or her certain demise, you want to share your difference (which he or she already knows remember, but if you must tell them again) and respectfully accept her or his.
Trust me, the quickest way to lose your teen to some “radial” idea forever is to show lack of respect and honor for his/her beliefs.
Recently, a friend of mine shared with me that she asked her 16-year-old son about his spiritual beliefs.
The first thing he said was that he did not want tell her because she would not agree—he knew what beliefs were.
But she insisted that she would not be upset.
When he told her, she respectfully asked, “Tell me about it?” , In other words, you are not going to church, temple, synagogue, mosque; or do you pray, chant, or meditate because you have to, but because you want to.
You want your teen to know that these practices are self-enhancing and you do them for those reasons.
Further, your teen needs to know that you worship or practice the way you do because of your own personal or inner convictions, not because you fear rejection or ostracizing.
It is important that your teen know that your beliefs come from within and that you would practice as you do no matter what anyone else around you practices or believes.
Your inner convictions will be a sign of your devotion as an inner strength. , You must embody your beliefs, so that you don’t have to practice them, they are apart of your thought processes and they influence your every move.
Whether at work, at school, at home, in the community, with friends, children, or adults your spirituality shows up in every thing you do. “Being” is what will make it easier to show your teen how to be.
You are still and will always be the most influential person in your teen’s life.
So be spiritual and respect them as spiritual beings and you will raise teens that are spiritually healthy too. , Make being part of a family of believers important.
Your kids will benefit from the connections of that community.
Develop a network of accountability with other in your church.
By establishing a strong link with a family of believers we anchor there sense of beliefs.
About the Author
Aaron Freeman
Creates helpful guides on hobbies to inspire and educate readers.
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