How to Stop Fighting with Your Family
Be the bigger person., Get some space., Try to compromise.If something that you do annoys them, make an effort to stop., Focus on a resolution., Avoid bringing up issues during times of celebration., Avoid trying to make your parents choose a side.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Be the bigger person.
Try to rise above the disagreement and show your level of maturity.
Consider how important the issue is that you are fighting about.
If it’s a serious matter that is truly affecting one of you, then you should sit down and give each person the opportunity to express themselves.Say something to the effect of “We’re sister/brothers.
We shouldn’t be fighting like cats and dogs.
Let’s take a moment to talk about this.
You go first.” Being willing to let the other person talk first can go a long way of showing that you want to resolve the problem.
If the issue isn’t that big of a deal, however, let it slide without a big fuss.
Siblings have little spats between them.
It doesn’t mean you don’t love and care for one another. -
Step 2: Get some space.
Sometimes, others get under your skin because one of you is already irritable or anxious.
Be willing to recognize when you are tense and take a moment to collect yourself before trying to sort out an argument.
It can actually help to recognize when you need a break ahead of time.
This can prevent you from saying words you’ll later regret.Go somewhere by yourself for a short time to gather your thoughts and calm down.
It can even help to leave your house or wherever you are and visit a friend. , Help them out, and show them that you're genuinely making an effort to get along.
It's normal and sometimes necessary to change some tiny aspect about yourself to get along with people—siblings are no different.
Choose a time and place to talk when you have both cooled off.
Think about how much you’re willing to bend to compromise.
Be truthful in sharing your thoughts and opinions (without being offensive) and be willing to listen to the other person’s side of things to.
Once the two of you make an agreement, uphold your end of the bargain.
It may also be a good idea to check in with your brother or sister regularly to see if they are satisfied with the progress you two are making. , While it's tempting to try to lay blame and to make your voice heard, resolving the issue is what's most important.
Think about what you'll enjoy from a healthy relationship with your sibling moving forward rather than trying to "win" an argument with them.
Understand that you each need to bring something to the table and work together, so don't try to make the process about getting what you want.
Apologize for what you've done to hurt your sibling.
Say, "I'm sorry I hurt you," or "I didn't realize that not coming to your birthday would upset you, but I'm sorry that I missed your special night."
Holidays, birthdays, anniversaries, weddings, and family events are not times to discuss your issues with your sibling.
Bringing up these issues will create a feeling of negativity that can ruin the event for everyone.
Additionally, your other family members who aren't involved in the issue should not have to hear about the dispute or be involved in working it out.
Instead, focus on celebrating the event with your family.
If you feel that your issues with your sibling will interfere with your enjoyment of the event, schedule a time to talk to them about the issue so that you know that your grievances will be aired, even if it's at a later date.
Write down what you want to discuss so that it isn't on your mind during the celebration.
Remind yourself of the good memories that you are creating for yourself and your family.
You don't want to look back on this event with negative feelings. , It’s common for siblings to want to pull mom and dad into a disagreement to determine who’s right and who’s wrong.
This is unfair to your parents and your sibling(s).
Unless the fight has turned potentially dangerous, try to exercise your conflict resolution skills without involving your parents. -
Step 3: Try to compromise.If something that you do annoys them
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Step 4: make an effort to stop.
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Step 5: Focus on a resolution.
-
Step 6: Avoid bringing up issues during times of celebration.
-
Step 7: Avoid trying to make your parents choose a side.
Detailed Guide
Try to rise above the disagreement and show your level of maturity.
Consider how important the issue is that you are fighting about.
If it’s a serious matter that is truly affecting one of you, then you should sit down and give each person the opportunity to express themselves.Say something to the effect of “We’re sister/brothers.
We shouldn’t be fighting like cats and dogs.
Let’s take a moment to talk about this.
You go first.” Being willing to let the other person talk first can go a long way of showing that you want to resolve the problem.
If the issue isn’t that big of a deal, however, let it slide without a big fuss.
Siblings have little spats between them.
It doesn’t mean you don’t love and care for one another.
Sometimes, others get under your skin because one of you is already irritable or anxious.
Be willing to recognize when you are tense and take a moment to collect yourself before trying to sort out an argument.
It can actually help to recognize when you need a break ahead of time.
This can prevent you from saying words you’ll later regret.Go somewhere by yourself for a short time to gather your thoughts and calm down.
It can even help to leave your house or wherever you are and visit a friend. , Help them out, and show them that you're genuinely making an effort to get along.
It's normal and sometimes necessary to change some tiny aspect about yourself to get along with people—siblings are no different.
Choose a time and place to talk when you have both cooled off.
Think about how much you’re willing to bend to compromise.
Be truthful in sharing your thoughts and opinions (without being offensive) and be willing to listen to the other person’s side of things to.
Once the two of you make an agreement, uphold your end of the bargain.
It may also be a good idea to check in with your brother or sister regularly to see if they are satisfied with the progress you two are making. , While it's tempting to try to lay blame and to make your voice heard, resolving the issue is what's most important.
Think about what you'll enjoy from a healthy relationship with your sibling moving forward rather than trying to "win" an argument with them.
Understand that you each need to bring something to the table and work together, so don't try to make the process about getting what you want.
Apologize for what you've done to hurt your sibling.
Say, "I'm sorry I hurt you," or "I didn't realize that not coming to your birthday would upset you, but I'm sorry that I missed your special night."
Holidays, birthdays, anniversaries, weddings, and family events are not times to discuss your issues with your sibling.
Bringing up these issues will create a feeling of negativity that can ruin the event for everyone.
Additionally, your other family members who aren't involved in the issue should not have to hear about the dispute or be involved in working it out.
Instead, focus on celebrating the event with your family.
If you feel that your issues with your sibling will interfere with your enjoyment of the event, schedule a time to talk to them about the issue so that you know that your grievances will be aired, even if it's at a later date.
Write down what you want to discuss so that it isn't on your mind during the celebration.
Remind yourself of the good memories that you are creating for yourself and your family.
You don't want to look back on this event with negative feelings. , It’s common for siblings to want to pull mom and dad into a disagreement to determine who’s right and who’s wrong.
This is unfair to your parents and your sibling(s).
Unless the fight has turned potentially dangerous, try to exercise your conflict resolution skills without involving your parents.
About the Author
Melissa Armstrong
A passionate writer with expertise in practical skills topics. Loves sharing practical knowledge.
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