How to Talk to Kids About Tough Issues
Spend quality time with your child(ren)., Practice respectful parenting., Don't pressure them to do something they aren't interested in., Be firm, but not punitive, when your child misbehaves., Take time to listen closely to them., Validate their...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Spend quality time with your child(ren).
Go places together, whether it is the park or the zoo, and take time to chat and ask them about their lives.
Share fun experiences together to build memories. -
Step 2: Practice respectful parenting.
Respectful parenting encourages trust and autonomy, and helps children feel that you believe in them and their decision-making skills.
When you want them to do something, explain why.
Let them make decisions about their own lives: from what cereal they eat, to what they wear, to which color rug they want in their room.
They will slowly gain confidence and a sense of responsibility. , This includes things from joining a sports team to eating broccoli.
This will show them that how they feel and what they want matters to you.
Instead of pressuring kids to share, tell kids to ask permission.
For example, "If you want to play with your sister's trucks, you'll have to ask her." Obviously, sometimes you need them to do something.
In those cases, you can be calm and firm. , It can be easy to lose your temper and yell or punish—or to give in.
Take a deep breath, and give a clear "no." Follow up with a clear explanation of why their action was a bad choice. "You need to sit in your car seat because it keeps you safe." "Hitting hurts people.
It is not okay.
I think you owe your brother an apology." "I know you don't want to go to bed right now.
It's fun to stay and play.
But you need to go to bed by 8:00, so you have enough sleep to be happy and healthy in the morning." "I am so upset right now, I need to take a break to cool off.
Then I will decide how to handle this."
People, including children, want to feel heard and understood.
Work on your listening skills so you can be attentive and helpful. , Validating can soothe people and help handle their emotions.
Recognize how your child is feeling, and let them know it's okay to feel that way.
This can release tension, because you know and care about how they feel. "I know it's fun to play at the park.
I like it here too.
But we do need to leave, so that we can eat lunch." "That sounds like a difficult day.
I can understand why you're upset."
When you or your child identifies a problem, talk to them about how to solve it together.
Brainstorm ideas and ask for their thoughts.
See if you can come up with a solution that leaves both of you satisfied. -
Step 3: Don't pressure them to do something they aren't interested in.
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Step 4: Be firm
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Step 5: but not punitive
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Step 6: when your child misbehaves.
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Step 7: Take time to listen closely to them.
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Step 8: Validate their feelings.
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Step 9: Be a problem-solving team.
Detailed Guide
Go places together, whether it is the park or the zoo, and take time to chat and ask them about their lives.
Share fun experiences together to build memories.
Respectful parenting encourages trust and autonomy, and helps children feel that you believe in them and their decision-making skills.
When you want them to do something, explain why.
Let them make decisions about their own lives: from what cereal they eat, to what they wear, to which color rug they want in their room.
They will slowly gain confidence and a sense of responsibility. , This includes things from joining a sports team to eating broccoli.
This will show them that how they feel and what they want matters to you.
Instead of pressuring kids to share, tell kids to ask permission.
For example, "If you want to play with your sister's trucks, you'll have to ask her." Obviously, sometimes you need them to do something.
In those cases, you can be calm and firm. , It can be easy to lose your temper and yell or punish—or to give in.
Take a deep breath, and give a clear "no." Follow up with a clear explanation of why their action was a bad choice. "You need to sit in your car seat because it keeps you safe." "Hitting hurts people.
It is not okay.
I think you owe your brother an apology." "I know you don't want to go to bed right now.
It's fun to stay and play.
But you need to go to bed by 8:00, so you have enough sleep to be happy and healthy in the morning." "I am so upset right now, I need to take a break to cool off.
Then I will decide how to handle this."
People, including children, want to feel heard and understood.
Work on your listening skills so you can be attentive and helpful. , Validating can soothe people and help handle their emotions.
Recognize how your child is feeling, and let them know it's okay to feel that way.
This can release tension, because you know and care about how they feel. "I know it's fun to play at the park.
I like it here too.
But we do need to leave, so that we can eat lunch." "That sounds like a difficult day.
I can understand why you're upset."
When you or your child identifies a problem, talk to them about how to solve it together.
Brainstorm ideas and ask for their thoughts.
See if you can come up with a solution that leaves both of you satisfied.
About the Author
Jerry Gibson
Professional writer focused on creating easy-to-follow pet care tutorials.
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