How to Avoid Obsessing over a Guy

Maintain perspective., Remind yourself about the person's flaws., Take care of yourself., Ask your crush how they feel.

4 Steps 2 min read Medium

Step-by-Step Guide

  1. Step 1: Maintain perspective.

    When you’re feeling uncertain or insecure, it’s easy to get caught up in the details.

    You might catch yourself over-analyzing every little aspect of your guy’s behavior:
    What did that shrug mean? Why is he laughing? Take a step back and get some perspective.

    Look at the bigger picture instead of stressing over every little thing.

    Put simply, if your crush or new guy keeps coming around, he obviously likes you.

    There’s no need to interpret every aspect of his behavior.
  2. Step 2: Remind yourself about the person's flaws.

    Your feelings about a crush or new beau are often skewed.

    You may find yourself idealizing the person, only seeing the positives.

    Make the effort to recognize and acknowledge the person’s flaws to remind yourself that they’re not perfect.

    Doing this can help you stop obsessing.Say aloud some of the flaws you’ve noticed about the person.

    This might sound like, “He’s terrible at calling me back.

    Plus, it annoys me that his clothes never match.” , If you’re obsessing about a guy, you may need to get some space from him.

    Shift the focus from him onto you.

    Pour all that energy back into yourself by engaging in self-care.Set aside some time daily to do things you enjoy.

    You might catch up on your favorite TV show, polish your nails, or spend time with friends. , If you are unable to get perspective and just let the relationship be, then have a talk with your guy.

    This is basically the equivalent of doing the thing you fear.

    If you ask him about whatever you’re obsessing over, those thoughts won’t have power over you anymore.Schedule a time when you both can talk without distractions.

    Bring up the subject by saying, “I’ve been going crazy lately about things and I figured it’s best to just talk to you about it.

    How do you really feel about me?”
  3. Step 3: Take care of yourself.

  4. Step 4: Ask your crush how they feel.

Detailed Guide

When you’re feeling uncertain or insecure, it’s easy to get caught up in the details.

You might catch yourself over-analyzing every little aspect of your guy’s behavior:
What did that shrug mean? Why is he laughing? Take a step back and get some perspective.

Look at the bigger picture instead of stressing over every little thing.

Put simply, if your crush or new guy keeps coming around, he obviously likes you.

There’s no need to interpret every aspect of his behavior.

Your feelings about a crush or new beau are often skewed.

You may find yourself idealizing the person, only seeing the positives.

Make the effort to recognize and acknowledge the person’s flaws to remind yourself that they’re not perfect.

Doing this can help you stop obsessing.Say aloud some of the flaws you’ve noticed about the person.

This might sound like, “He’s terrible at calling me back.

Plus, it annoys me that his clothes never match.” , If you’re obsessing about a guy, you may need to get some space from him.

Shift the focus from him onto you.

Pour all that energy back into yourself by engaging in self-care.Set aside some time daily to do things you enjoy.

You might catch up on your favorite TV show, polish your nails, or spend time with friends. , If you are unable to get perspective and just let the relationship be, then have a talk with your guy.

This is basically the equivalent of doing the thing you fear.

If you ask him about whatever you’re obsessing over, those thoughts won’t have power over you anymore.Schedule a time when you both can talk without distractions.

Bring up the subject by saying, “I’ve been going crazy lately about things and I figured it’s best to just talk to you about it.

How do you really feel about me?”

About the Author

E

Elizabeth Long

Brings years of experience writing about lifestyle and related subjects.

65 articles
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