How to Be Kinder to Yourself

Step-by-Step Guide

1. 1

   Step 1: Accept that failure is normal.

   The very first thing we need to address is that failure is acceptable.
   
   In fact, failure can be very positive.
   
   It is how we learned to walk, to talk, to ride a bike, to read and to write.
   
   Imagine a life where we never tried anything for fear of failure.
2. 2

   Step 2: Let go of self harm.

   Beating yourself up over something that didn't go your way is unproductive.
   
   Simply learn from that experience and attempt it again, this time using your new found knowledge to guide you. , These phrases can be become a habit, and become self fulfilling.
   
   Be aware of your own idiosyncrasies, and stop repeating them. , You cannot change the past and you cannot change the future, all that you can change is right here and now.
   
   If you have any skeletons in the closet, or you've done things you're not proud of––welcome to rest of humanity.
   
   There isn't a soul out there who hasn't.
   
   However, all that is in the past, and as you cannot change it, there is no point in spending our precious "now" living out alternate endings that can never be.
   
   Let them go.
   
   Focus on how good you are now. , You see, a smile from the heart is more beautiful on even the plainest of faces compared to the look of self pity on the most pretty.
   
   It doesn't matter if your smile is crooked, or your eyes look funny, it doesn't matter if you have a stunning smile or not.
   
   So long as you let it come from the heart, and it is genuine. , See the comedy in being human.
   
   We are all fallible, every single one of us, from president to pauper.
   
   We are all peculiar in some way or other.
   
   We are all a little strange.
   
   And we can all take ourselves a little too seriously at times.
   
   Take a step back and have a good giggle at yourself once in while.
   
   See the funny side in buying the horrid lurid purple Lycra jumper that you thought looked outstanding in the shop. , You will only pit your worst qualities against those who excel in that area.
   
   There are a lot of people in this world, you cannot beat everyone at everything.
   
   Don't even try.
   
   If you do admire someone's virtues, aim to be a little like them and not completely like them, unless of course you are prepared to take on their vices as well. , Keep two feet on the ground with regards to your goals and aspirations.
   
   But don't let that stop you from climbing mountains.
   
   As even the highest peak is conquered one step at time.
   
   Keep the distance between steps manageable and maintainable, and keep at a steady pace and you will be delighted with the progress. , You'll only find yourself guilty for things you are innocent of. , Remember, they are often worrying what you may think of them.
3. 3

   Step 3: Be aware of negative self commentary

4. 4

   Step 4: "I'm an idiot"

5. 5

   Step 5: "I'm no good at this"

6. 6

   Step 6: "I will never be able to that".

7. 7

   Step 7: Learn to let things go.

8. 8

   Step 8: Be at one with your own smile.

9. 9

   Step 9: Learn to laugh at yourself.

10. 10

    Step 10: Do not compare yourself to others.

11. 11

    Step 11: Be realistic.

12. 12

    Step 12: Don't be judge and jury of yourself.

13. 13

    Step 13: Do not worry what others think of you so much.

Detailed Guide

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