How to Cope With Stigma
Realize that you are not your stigma., Redefine your identity position in your own terms., Focus on other aspects of you., Have positive mental reminders., Have confidence in your abilities.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Realize that you are not your stigma.
When you woke up this morning, did you or your stigma brush your teeth? Did you or your stigma cook dinner last night? Do your family and friends love you or your stigma? That's right: they're two entirely separate things.
When people that really care about you look at you, they see you as a person.
So when you look at yourself, you should see “you,” too. -
Step 2: Redefine your identity position in your own terms.
It’s important to keep in mind that identity positions are not static.
We all have some degree of freedom in positioning ourselves as one type of identity or another, regardless of how we are treated by others.
Spend some time on your own to identify what you really enjoy doing.
Make a list of your positive qualities.
These can include your mannerisms, behaviors, and beliefs.Make a list of your characteristics that you could work on.For example, you might write, “I usually shy away from confrontation and I cave in too easily to other people’s demands.” Make a list of what you’d like to change about yourself and what you need to do to achieve these changes.
For example, if you don’t want to cave in so easily to other people’s demands, you might write, “I want to learn to be more assertive.” Then, you might take an assertiveness training workshop.
These steps will help you conceive of yourself in a way that doesn’t immediately put your stigma in the foreground. , Your stigma might be a part of who you are and the challenges you have to deal with in this life, but they don't define you as a person.
People in wheelchairs can still go skydiving.
People who are hard of hearing can still hold conversations.
They just have to learn a different way of doing things, but this does not stop them from living fulfilling lives.
Whether the reasons for your stigma are visible or not, this is doable.
A visible set of conditions would be being in a wheelchair or blind.
An invisible issue would be HIV, renal disease, MS, or anything that doesn't immediately draw attention.
Underneath your “condition,” however, you still exist.
Your sense of humor, your wit, your smile and other aspects about you can hog the spotlight.
Spend some extra time practicing the activities you excel at.
This will help other people see you in a different light. , When you are managing your stigma, it can seem like a very difficult task.
It can be helpful to have some sort of mental reminder or mantra that will help refocus your attention away from what’s bothering you in the present.
For example, imagine a person or place that makes you happy.
Or, remind yourself that not everyone is ignorant about your stigma.
Remind yourself about the supportive people in your life.
When it comes to your own thoughts, pay attention to whether they are mostly negative or positive.
If you can’t accept who you are, it will make it more difficult for people around you to do so. , Never think there's something you can't do because of a disability.
Try out new hobbies or activities.
If you have physical trouble doing something, such as playing basketball, find a wheelchair basketball league.
Having a positive attitude and trying new things are good first steps in building your confidence. -
Step 3: Focus on other aspects of you.
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Step 4: Have positive mental reminders.
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Step 5: Have confidence in your abilities.
Detailed Guide
When you woke up this morning, did you or your stigma brush your teeth? Did you or your stigma cook dinner last night? Do your family and friends love you or your stigma? That's right: they're two entirely separate things.
When people that really care about you look at you, they see you as a person.
So when you look at yourself, you should see “you,” too.
It’s important to keep in mind that identity positions are not static.
We all have some degree of freedom in positioning ourselves as one type of identity or another, regardless of how we are treated by others.
Spend some time on your own to identify what you really enjoy doing.
Make a list of your positive qualities.
These can include your mannerisms, behaviors, and beliefs.Make a list of your characteristics that you could work on.For example, you might write, “I usually shy away from confrontation and I cave in too easily to other people’s demands.” Make a list of what you’d like to change about yourself and what you need to do to achieve these changes.
For example, if you don’t want to cave in so easily to other people’s demands, you might write, “I want to learn to be more assertive.” Then, you might take an assertiveness training workshop.
These steps will help you conceive of yourself in a way that doesn’t immediately put your stigma in the foreground. , Your stigma might be a part of who you are and the challenges you have to deal with in this life, but they don't define you as a person.
People in wheelchairs can still go skydiving.
People who are hard of hearing can still hold conversations.
They just have to learn a different way of doing things, but this does not stop them from living fulfilling lives.
Whether the reasons for your stigma are visible or not, this is doable.
A visible set of conditions would be being in a wheelchair or blind.
An invisible issue would be HIV, renal disease, MS, or anything that doesn't immediately draw attention.
Underneath your “condition,” however, you still exist.
Your sense of humor, your wit, your smile and other aspects about you can hog the spotlight.
Spend some extra time practicing the activities you excel at.
This will help other people see you in a different light. , When you are managing your stigma, it can seem like a very difficult task.
It can be helpful to have some sort of mental reminder or mantra that will help refocus your attention away from what’s bothering you in the present.
For example, imagine a person or place that makes you happy.
Or, remind yourself that not everyone is ignorant about your stigma.
Remind yourself about the supportive people in your life.
When it comes to your own thoughts, pay attention to whether they are mostly negative or positive.
If you can’t accept who you are, it will make it more difficult for people around you to do so. , Never think there's something you can't do because of a disability.
Try out new hobbies or activities.
If you have physical trouble doing something, such as playing basketball, find a wheelchair basketball league.
Having a positive attitude and trying new things are good first steps in building your confidence.
About the Author
Melissa Peterson
Professional writer focused on creating easy-to-follow practical skills tutorials.
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