How to Cry Without People Knowing
Wait until you are alone., Excuse yourself from the situation., Cry quietly., Don’t worry., Let it out.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Wait until you are alone.
This may be difficult, but if you feel that you need to cry, try to wait until you can get somewhere private.
Your own room is always a good choice, if it’s available.
If you are not at home, going outside for a few minutes usually won’t arouse too much suspicion.
Likewise, the bathroom is usually always a good choice, if it is a private bathroom you can lock the door for 5-10 minutes without anyone thinking anything of it.
If you are in a public bathroom, go in one of the stalls and lock the door.
You will have to be more aware of any noise you might be making, but it will still afford you some privacy.
If you need to hide a sob that you can’t keep in, try flushing the toilet to hide the noise. -
Step 2: Excuse yourself from the situation.
If you feel like you still have control over yourself, you can politely say, “I need to use the restroom”, or “I need a few minutes to take a phone call outside.” This will discourage anyone who might wish to accompany you outside.
If you feel that you are very close to tears, this might be more difficult.
One way to avoid making eye contact is to pretend someone has called or sent you a message.
This way, you can pull your phone out, and step away without saying anything or looking at anyone.
If you can manage it, just simply say “excuse me for a moment”, if not don’t say anything.
The people around you might think it was a little rude, but when you come back, just apologize and say you had to take that message/phone call as you had been waiting for it all day. , When we are very upset, it can be very satisfying to cry loudly; however, if you are trying to keep it secret, you should cry as quietly as possible, especially if you are in a place where you might easily be heard.
Breathe in and out slowly and deeply.
Don’t hold your breath! If you do hold your breath, eventually you will have to breathe out, and at this point there is a good chance you will make a sobbing sound.
Taking deep breaths will also help you calm down.
Dab your eyes gently.
Use a tissue, or your sleeve if you don’t have one, and gently dab the tears as they fall.
Try not to rub as this will make your eyes even more swollen and red. , It is OK to cry, and you should not feel bad or embarrassed about it.
Especially if you’ve managed to find somewhere private.
Instead, try working out whatever is upsetting you so much to see if you can find a solution.
Obviously, there may be some instances where something has happened that doesn’t have a solution (e.g. loss of a loved one).
In this case give yourself permission to be sad and upset for a few minutes.
Try to take deep breaths, which will make the crying quieter, but will also help to calm you a bit. , If you’ve managed to find a safe place to cry in private, then let it all out.
Unless you’re in a hurry, you should give yourself a few minutes to release the emotions you are feeling.
Again, if there is a chance someone might hear you, then try to keep quiet, but don’t try to hold it all in.
This might make things worse.
Once you’ve let off some steam, do your best to calm yourself.
Take a few slow, deep breaths and try to smile.
This will trick your brain into thinking happier thoughts, and instantly provide a tiny bit of positive feelings. -
Step 3: Cry quietly.
-
Step 4: Don’t worry.
-
Step 5: Let it out.
Detailed Guide
This may be difficult, but if you feel that you need to cry, try to wait until you can get somewhere private.
Your own room is always a good choice, if it’s available.
If you are not at home, going outside for a few minutes usually won’t arouse too much suspicion.
Likewise, the bathroom is usually always a good choice, if it is a private bathroom you can lock the door for 5-10 minutes without anyone thinking anything of it.
If you are in a public bathroom, go in one of the stalls and lock the door.
You will have to be more aware of any noise you might be making, but it will still afford you some privacy.
If you need to hide a sob that you can’t keep in, try flushing the toilet to hide the noise.
If you feel like you still have control over yourself, you can politely say, “I need to use the restroom”, or “I need a few minutes to take a phone call outside.” This will discourage anyone who might wish to accompany you outside.
If you feel that you are very close to tears, this might be more difficult.
One way to avoid making eye contact is to pretend someone has called or sent you a message.
This way, you can pull your phone out, and step away without saying anything or looking at anyone.
If you can manage it, just simply say “excuse me for a moment”, if not don’t say anything.
The people around you might think it was a little rude, but when you come back, just apologize and say you had to take that message/phone call as you had been waiting for it all day. , When we are very upset, it can be very satisfying to cry loudly; however, if you are trying to keep it secret, you should cry as quietly as possible, especially if you are in a place where you might easily be heard.
Breathe in and out slowly and deeply.
Don’t hold your breath! If you do hold your breath, eventually you will have to breathe out, and at this point there is a good chance you will make a sobbing sound.
Taking deep breaths will also help you calm down.
Dab your eyes gently.
Use a tissue, or your sleeve if you don’t have one, and gently dab the tears as they fall.
Try not to rub as this will make your eyes even more swollen and red. , It is OK to cry, and you should not feel bad or embarrassed about it.
Especially if you’ve managed to find somewhere private.
Instead, try working out whatever is upsetting you so much to see if you can find a solution.
Obviously, there may be some instances where something has happened that doesn’t have a solution (e.g. loss of a loved one).
In this case give yourself permission to be sad and upset for a few minutes.
Try to take deep breaths, which will make the crying quieter, but will also help to calm you a bit. , If you’ve managed to find a safe place to cry in private, then let it all out.
Unless you’re in a hurry, you should give yourself a few minutes to release the emotions you are feeling.
Again, if there is a chance someone might hear you, then try to keep quiet, but don’t try to hold it all in.
This might make things worse.
Once you’ve let off some steam, do your best to calm yourself.
Take a few slow, deep breaths and try to smile.
This will trick your brain into thinking happier thoughts, and instantly provide a tiny bit of positive feelings.
About the Author
Hannah Johnson
Experienced content creator specializing in creative arts guides and tutorials.
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