How to Deal With a Proud Person
Be non-invasive., Come bearing offerings., Be intuitive., Resist taking this behavior personally., Focus on the common ground you and the other person share., Know your own limits., Recognize territoriality and confrontational behavior., Be clear...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Be non-invasive.
Proud people can often be irritable or even downright aggressive.
These are barriers put up to shield themselves from vulnerability.
Recognize this personality trait and resist prying for justification of this person's behavior, as this will only be counterproductive.
If the person has already proven to be unresponsive to constructive dialogue, sometimes it's best to accept his or her refusal for the time being. -
Step 2: Come bearing offerings.
A little sugar never hurt anyone! The next time you see this person, you might want to bring something that lightens the mood and pleases — perhaps a cup of coffee, a lemon and candied ginger muffin, or a fun story that might be appreciated.
A gesture of generosity, even if not necessarily warranted, could help turn things around.
Occasionally, the person may not ask for help but will accept help (or offerings) when given without having to ask. , Although it is best not to pry, you can still observe and decipher such negative behavior in order to identify its "triggers." Get to a point at which you can intuitively recognize when tension may arise and then find a quick way defuse it.
These articles might help with redirecting:
How to Defuse an Argument How to Avoid Uncomfortable Conversations About Religion How to Cope With an Overbearing In Law , You are not the cause.
See How to Stop Taking Things Personally. , Perhaps this is a shared work task, a common appreciation for a TV show or musical artist, or a love of fly fishing.
If the point of contact is a shared task, find a way to move on from a point of contention and redirect energy to the task at hand.
If you are in a social or familial relationship with this person, find ways to cultivate these commonalities.
Go fly fishing, or give a subscription to a fly fishing magazine as a gift. , This is a popular phrase used in yoga, and it may serve you well in your relationship with a proud person.
In addition to understanding the other's behavior, it is important to recognize how much you can take of a particular side of this person's personality.
If someone is too aggressive, for example, politely find a way out.
Maybe you have an urgent deadline on another project or an obligation to someone else to move a couch, pick up groceries, etc.
Protect yourself by setting up boundaries. , Another person's stubbornness need not cause you to act in like fashion.
Concede a point in order to move on.
If your point is the better of the two, this will ultimately become clear one way or another, even if at a later date. , Agree to disagree.
See How to Gain Control of Your Emotions. , Overcome disappointment if your proud person is unable to recognize your efforts or express gratitude for your help.
This person is probably grateful; s/he is just not able to express it in a way you that you expect or understand. , Maintaining good relationships with people, whether they be proud or not, requires reflection, flexibility, and generosity.
If one keeps this in mind, it will be possible to relate well to most people, even those who are particularly difficult. , Proud people like to take control and maintain their autonomy.
Whatever the situation, ask for this person's opinion.
Engage his or her voice as a sign of respect.
Everyone responds well to that! -
Step 3: Be intuitive.
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Step 4: Resist taking this behavior personally.
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Step 5: Focus on the common ground you and the other person share.
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Step 6: Know your own limits.
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Step 7: Recognize territoriality and confrontational behavior.
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Step 8: Be clear
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Step 9: logical
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Step 10: non-judgmental
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Step 11: and unemotional in your communication.
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Step 12: Rely on your own sense of accomplishment or good will.
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Step 13: Understand that every relationship you have with a particular person is a unique one requiring different roles and strategies.
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Step 14: Ask for their help.
Detailed Guide
Proud people can often be irritable or even downright aggressive.
These are barriers put up to shield themselves from vulnerability.
Recognize this personality trait and resist prying for justification of this person's behavior, as this will only be counterproductive.
If the person has already proven to be unresponsive to constructive dialogue, sometimes it's best to accept his or her refusal for the time being.
A little sugar never hurt anyone! The next time you see this person, you might want to bring something that lightens the mood and pleases — perhaps a cup of coffee, a lemon and candied ginger muffin, or a fun story that might be appreciated.
A gesture of generosity, even if not necessarily warranted, could help turn things around.
Occasionally, the person may not ask for help but will accept help (or offerings) when given without having to ask. , Although it is best not to pry, you can still observe and decipher such negative behavior in order to identify its "triggers." Get to a point at which you can intuitively recognize when tension may arise and then find a quick way defuse it.
These articles might help with redirecting:
How to Defuse an Argument How to Avoid Uncomfortable Conversations About Religion How to Cope With an Overbearing In Law , You are not the cause.
See How to Stop Taking Things Personally. , Perhaps this is a shared work task, a common appreciation for a TV show or musical artist, or a love of fly fishing.
If the point of contact is a shared task, find a way to move on from a point of contention and redirect energy to the task at hand.
If you are in a social or familial relationship with this person, find ways to cultivate these commonalities.
Go fly fishing, or give a subscription to a fly fishing magazine as a gift. , This is a popular phrase used in yoga, and it may serve you well in your relationship with a proud person.
In addition to understanding the other's behavior, it is important to recognize how much you can take of a particular side of this person's personality.
If someone is too aggressive, for example, politely find a way out.
Maybe you have an urgent deadline on another project or an obligation to someone else to move a couch, pick up groceries, etc.
Protect yourself by setting up boundaries. , Another person's stubbornness need not cause you to act in like fashion.
Concede a point in order to move on.
If your point is the better of the two, this will ultimately become clear one way or another, even if at a later date. , Agree to disagree.
See How to Gain Control of Your Emotions. , Overcome disappointment if your proud person is unable to recognize your efforts or express gratitude for your help.
This person is probably grateful; s/he is just not able to express it in a way you that you expect or understand. , Maintaining good relationships with people, whether they be proud or not, requires reflection, flexibility, and generosity.
If one keeps this in mind, it will be possible to relate well to most people, even those who are particularly difficult. , Proud people like to take control and maintain their autonomy.
Whatever the situation, ask for this person's opinion.
Engage his or her voice as a sign of respect.
Everyone responds well to that!
About the Author
Samuel Henderson
Samuel Henderson specializes in educational content and has been creating helpful content for over 5 years. Samuel is committed to helping readers learn new skills and improve their lives.
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