How to Disobey Someone

Step-by-Step Guide

1. 1

   Step 1: Understand what the person wants from you.

   First, make sure you are interpreting them correctly.
   
   Ask for clarification if need be. (This can also be a good time to communicate any concerns.) "Wait, I'm confused.
   
   What do you want me to say to Deborah?" "All right.
   
   What do I do if it overheats?" "I'm not sure I understand what you're asking me to do.
   
   Would you please explain it in more detail?"
2. 2

   Step 2: Evaluate the consequences either way.

   What happens if you disobey them? What happens if you obey? Consider how it would affect you, the other person, and each person involved in this situation.
   
   Is is possible that you could partially obey them? Be cautious about imagining worst-case scenarios.
   
   Yes, those could happen.
   
   Don't scare or distract yourself, though—focus on what is likely to happen. , If you're going to disobey someone, you should have a good reason.
   
   Try writing it down or mulling it over on a long walk.
   
   If you want to disobey just to show them you can, it's time to take a look at why you feel that way.
   
   Have they upset you, or do you feel they're trying to control you? Examine your feelings, get outside advice if needed, and try having a heart-to-heart conversation. , If they are an authority figure in your school or workplace, then you probably do.
   
   If they are a mentor (e.g. grandmother, older sibling, religious figure), then you don't need it.
   
   If they are in charge of you, then you may get in trouble for disobedience, and if not, you don't need to worry about it as much.
   
   Part of being an adult is being able to make your own choices, even if they are bad ones.
   
   If you are or are becoming an adult, it's natural to begin exercising this ability. , If obeying the person means hurting yourself or others, when there are better options out there, avoid hurting people.
   
   If someone tells you to break the laws, don't break the law. "My boss/teacher told me to" will not excuse you if you did something illegal.In some cases, the law may be unfair and you may choose civil disobedience. (For example, if the police are unfairly trying to stop a peaceful protest, you may decide to stay anyway.) This is up to your own moral code and willingness to face consequences.
3. 3

   Step 3: Examine your reasons.

4. 4

   Step 4: Consider whether you actually need the person's approval.

5. 5

   Step 5: Disobey if it's the only way to follow the laws and avoid doing harm.

Detailed Guide

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