How to Function in Life as an Alcoholic

Step-by-Step Guide

1. 1

   Step 1: Acknowledge you have a problem which you are not willing to solve.

   Going to work drunk can get you fired, or your professional accreditations revoked.
   
   Always make sure that you are sober at work. , Even drunk promises...
   
   If you can remember what they are.
   
   People judge, and blackouts equal alcoholic. , The major contributor to bad breath is remains of food stuck between your teeth.
   
   In addition to mouthwash, it is a pretty good idea to brush the tongue and soft palette to cleanse the breath.
   
   Cologne/perfume may be used, but in normal doses only.
   
   Excessive use will attract attention. , "I was drunk and didn't know what I was doing" is not an excuse. , Good luck! Others notice you slurring while you do not. , This will help you avoid "drunk dialing" or "drunk texting." Also consider staying away from the computer to avoid e-mailing or instant messaging people while you're drunk.
   
   You may say things you don't want them to know or things you will otherwise regret saying. , So, don't even consider driving when you're "just a little buzzed"
   
   For example, quickly do your monthly rent transfer over the net, or quickly pen down a few solid points for an upcoming meeting at work.
   
   Do this over a ten or fifteen minute period whilst drinking a cup of coffee so that you delay hitting the bottle immediately, and get essential things done.
   
   Make it a non-negotiable rule that you need to pause in this way for twenty minutes when you get home from work each day.
2. 2

   Step 2: Make sure you are sober when you go to work.

3. 3

   Step 3: Always keep your promises.

4. 4

   Step 4: Before you leave your home

5. 5

   Step 5: apply fresh deodorant

6. 6

   Step 6: brush your teeth and floss.

7. 7

   Step 7: Driving under the influence is very dangerous and people die as a result.

8. 8

   Step 8: Practice your speaking while drunk.

9. 9

   Step 9: Give your phone to someone else when you're drinking or put it where it's not easily accessible.

10. 10

    Step 10: Realize that when you feel "buzzed" your alcohol level is probably higher than the legal limit because you've built up a tolerance.

11. 11

    Step 11: When you get home from work

12. 12

    Step 12: very quickly try to complete a few essential tasks related to keeping your job or the roof over your head.

Detailed Guide

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