How to Improve Soft Skills

Aim to be understood., Make eye contact., Monitor your body language., Practice speaking., Develop your writing skills., Practice active listening skills., Pay attention to the other person's body language.

7 Steps 4 min read Medium

Step-by-Step Guide

  1. Step 1: Aim to be understood.

    Your goal, whether speaking or writing, should be to communicate clearly.

    Fancy or highfalutin language can oftentimes make the point you're trying to make confusing or unclear.

    Some ideas to improve your clarity in communication include:
    Staying on topic.

    Focus on the point of your communication.

    This could be something as simple as determining whether your coworker is free for lunch.

    Be specific when communicating.

    You may have difficulty getting to the point.

    To improve your clarity, use specific terms instead of general pronouns or indefinite periods of time.
  2. Step 2: Make eye contact.

    Acknowledge that you are paying attention to someone by meeting their gaze eye to eye.

    Eye contact will make your conversation partner feel like you're more engaged.

    If you have difficulty doing this, turn your body to face the person you're speaking with.

    By turning your body to face your conversation partner directly, you'll naturally be more likely to look them in the eye.

    If you're uncomfortable looking someone directly in the eyes, choose a point just above or below the eyes, like the bridge of the nose, and look there instead.

    Even if there are other distractions in the room, keep your eyes focused on your conversation partner.

    Allowing your gaze to wander can come across as rude., Show interest by sitting up and leaning forward slightly.

    Resist the urge to tap your fingers or foot, as this can indicate impatience.

    You can also connect with conversation partners by mimicking their posture.

    Although it might seem odd at first, by mimicking the posture of your conversation partner, you're subconsciously sending the message that you both are the same, which will put them at ease.

    Try to curb unconscious motions that could be taken the wrong way, like playing with your hair or bouncing your leg up and down., This includes both public speaking and casual conversation.

    Even if you're uncomfortable speaking in front of others, practice will make speaking come more easily and improve your ability.

    Be conscious of your pace and volume while practicing.

    If you are uneasy in personal relationships, try practicing with a close friend or family member you are comfortable with.

    If you are nervous about speaking in public, volunteer to give presentations within a smaller group and work your way up to a larger one., Much like speaking, the more you write, the easier it will become.

    You can also take courses to improve your writing.

    You can do writing exercises on your own.

    You can also frequently find affordable writing workshops offered at community centers or community colleges.When you finish writing something, be sure to glance it over for grammar and spelling errors.

    This only takes a minute or two, and can drastically improve the quality of your written work.

    Be direct and to the point instead of elaborate.

    Although you may feel uncomfortable with this at first, being direct can greatly improve the clarity of your writing. , Listening requires focus and self-discipline.

    We listen for many different reasons: to understand instructions, to empathize with another individual, or to judge whether a plan is good or not.

    You can show your conversation partner you're paying attention by:
    Paraphrasing and asking questions about what was said.

    This demonstrates interest and focus.

    It also helps you understand the situation.

    Taking notes when appropriate.

    This shows that the subject matter is important to you.

    Practice taking notes in team meetings or staff training sessions.

    Refraining from interrupting others.

    Show you respect your speaking partner by letting them finish saying what they are saying., Observe their posture, tone of voice, eye contact (or lack thereof), gestures, and facial expressions.

    This can offer clues for how you might best respond and can help you better understand your conversation partner's frame of mind.For example, if your coworker has red eyes and is sniffling, you might surmise that they have allergies or a cold.

    In this situation, you might want to be more sensitive, as it's likely they don't feel well.

    If your speaking partner keeps checking the time, they might be enjoying your conversation but have an appointment to keep.
  3. Step 3: Monitor your body language.

  4. Step 4: Practice speaking.

  5. Step 5: Develop your writing skills.

  6. Step 6: Practice active listening skills.

  7. Step 7: Pay attention to the other person's body language.

Detailed Guide

Your goal, whether speaking or writing, should be to communicate clearly.

Fancy or highfalutin language can oftentimes make the point you're trying to make confusing or unclear.

Some ideas to improve your clarity in communication include:
Staying on topic.

Focus on the point of your communication.

This could be something as simple as determining whether your coworker is free for lunch.

Be specific when communicating.

You may have difficulty getting to the point.

To improve your clarity, use specific terms instead of general pronouns or indefinite periods of time.

Acknowledge that you are paying attention to someone by meeting their gaze eye to eye.

Eye contact will make your conversation partner feel like you're more engaged.

If you have difficulty doing this, turn your body to face the person you're speaking with.

By turning your body to face your conversation partner directly, you'll naturally be more likely to look them in the eye.

If you're uncomfortable looking someone directly in the eyes, choose a point just above or below the eyes, like the bridge of the nose, and look there instead.

Even if there are other distractions in the room, keep your eyes focused on your conversation partner.

Allowing your gaze to wander can come across as rude., Show interest by sitting up and leaning forward slightly.

Resist the urge to tap your fingers or foot, as this can indicate impatience.

You can also connect with conversation partners by mimicking their posture.

Although it might seem odd at first, by mimicking the posture of your conversation partner, you're subconsciously sending the message that you both are the same, which will put them at ease.

Try to curb unconscious motions that could be taken the wrong way, like playing with your hair or bouncing your leg up and down., This includes both public speaking and casual conversation.

Even if you're uncomfortable speaking in front of others, practice will make speaking come more easily and improve your ability.

Be conscious of your pace and volume while practicing.

If you are uneasy in personal relationships, try practicing with a close friend or family member you are comfortable with.

If you are nervous about speaking in public, volunteer to give presentations within a smaller group and work your way up to a larger one., Much like speaking, the more you write, the easier it will become.

You can also take courses to improve your writing.

You can do writing exercises on your own.

You can also frequently find affordable writing workshops offered at community centers or community colleges.When you finish writing something, be sure to glance it over for grammar and spelling errors.

This only takes a minute or two, and can drastically improve the quality of your written work.

Be direct and to the point instead of elaborate.

Although you may feel uncomfortable with this at first, being direct can greatly improve the clarity of your writing. , Listening requires focus and self-discipline.

We listen for many different reasons: to understand instructions, to empathize with another individual, or to judge whether a plan is good or not.

You can show your conversation partner you're paying attention by:
Paraphrasing and asking questions about what was said.

This demonstrates interest and focus.

It also helps you understand the situation.

Taking notes when appropriate.

This shows that the subject matter is important to you.

Practice taking notes in team meetings or staff training sessions.

Refraining from interrupting others.

Show you respect your speaking partner by letting them finish saying what they are saying., Observe their posture, tone of voice, eye contact (or lack thereof), gestures, and facial expressions.

This can offer clues for how you might best respond and can help you better understand your conversation partner's frame of mind.For example, if your coworker has red eyes and is sniffling, you might surmise that they have allergies or a cold.

In this situation, you might want to be more sensitive, as it's likely they don't feel well.

If your speaking partner keeps checking the time, they might be enjoying your conversation but have an appointment to keep.

About the Author

M

Matthew Webb

Writer and educator with a focus on practical cooking knowledge.

55 articles
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