How to Remain Sane with Stepchildren in the House

Step-by-Step Guide

1. 1

   Step 1: Do not talk about adult matters in front of the stepchildren.

   Keep chit chat shallow and in the present.
   
   Talk about what you are doing, and things in the immediate environment.
2. 2

   Step 2: Give the children respect and space.

   However, also demand your own space and expect respect in return for being respectful. , Get involved and do this activity with them now and then. , If your spouse does not discipline their own kids, or demand their respect for you, then refer to the next method, as you will never get the stepparent status you seek without your spouse's support. , Only offer advice to your stepchildren when they ask for it, or when they talk openly to you about something. , No matter what kind of a person they may be, this is an absolute.
   
   Kids always love their biological parent, and will always hold out hope that they will be a good person – even if they tell you otherwise. , Plan activities for yourself, or for you and your own biological children, which will keep you away from home while the stepchildren are visiting. , Let them know that you deserve to be happy and comfortable.
   
   If they are the reason the stepchildren can't, or won't, bond with you, then perhaps this will encourage them to make positive changes.
   
   If the stepchildren's biological parent is the reason they won't or can't bond with you, then your spouse should understand you, and love you enough to see that you are happy. , If they are interested, they will eventually seek you out.
   
   If not, then you have not wasted your life's energy on the ungrateful.
   
   If you must stay in the house while the stepkids are visiting, stay busy and engaged in various tasks or hobbies, preferably in a different part of the house.
   
   Be kind if they need something such as a glass of water, or a bath towel, but leave the major questions and daily events to your spouse.
   
   If your stepchild feels like engaging you in a pleasant conversation, take part with a smile! However, be aware of probing questions, and refer such questions to your spouse, as stepkids in this situation may just be fishing for information to bring back to their mother or father.
3. 3

   Step 3: Discover what the stepchildren enjoy doing.

4. 4

   Step 4: Discuss your household discipline plan with your spouse and remain a team.

5. 5

   Step 5: Keep your opinions to yourself.

6. 6

   Step 6: ever badmouth their biological parent.

7. 7

   Step 7: Keep a schedule of your stepchildren's visits.

8. 8

   Step 8: If your spouse protests

9. 9

   Step 9: talk to them about why you are doing this.

10. 10

    Step 10: Do not actively seek a relationship with your stepchildren.

Detailed Guide

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