How to Save Yourself from Toxic People
Spot the toxic waste before it gets too close., Trust your gut-- if someone makes you upset and uncomfortable, make some space., Pay attention to body language and tone of voice., Keep your eyes and ears peeled for hotheads., Stay away from the...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Spot the toxic waste before it gets too close.
We all have our down days.
But when it comes to toxic people, the blues are a constant rain cloud.
And they want everyone to be just as wet and miserable as them.
If you never see emotions other than anger, sadness, and jealousy, it is best to steer clear of that personality.
Keep an eye out for the following toxic traits:
Jittery, nervous energy.
Constant whining and complaining Clinginess and dependency Criticism, usually aimed everywhere Negative or cynical worldview -
Step 2: Trust your gut-- if someone makes you upset and uncomfortable
When you walk into the store to buy a new box of Cheerios, you know immediately what kind of mood the cashier is in.
You can see it, even feel it, in your interaction.
You can do this with your friends and coworkers, too! Even if you don't see the tell-tale signs, you know when something is off, and you know to avoid some people.
Trust yourself
-- there are plenty of happy people out there without trying out all the sourpusses. , Listen to the sounds made, more than what people actually say.
You can hear it when someone is just going through the motions.
How do people relate to you? What do they seem to be thinking when they speak? Bad body language looks like a sullen, sulky teenager
-- shoulders down, lack of eye-contact, big, hostile gestures, etc.
Good body language looks like George Washington across the Delaware: back straight, chin up, shoulders back, etc. , Anger, shouting, and negative criticism are major signs of a toxic personality.
Angry people sometimes need a lot of help, but it's not your job to be their punching bag.
It is definitely not your job to try and fix them! Staying around a person like this will cause you to become angry too.
So kick back and find someone else to talk to: you'll have a lot more fun.
People who have control over their emotions don't usually feel the need to shout, so watch out for the loud ones.
Watch out for quiet,simmering anger as well.
Some people won't say much, but will use poor body language and bottle it up instead.
These people lash out at odd times, when anger doesn't seem called for.
Luckily, this is basically a neon "Personal BioHazard" sign.
If you have to work with angry people, never stoop to anger
-- you'll just rile them up further.
Keep in professional, polite, and quick, and just walk out if they lose their temper.
They'll hate you for it, but they'll learn their lesson sooner or later. , Do you know someone who finds the darkness in everything? Much like your parents on Thanksgiving, misery loves company.
These people will always complain about something, never see the good in anything, and claim they hate everything.
It's exhausting just thinking about it, which is why they'll try to drag you into their little pity party.
People with very negative worldview will often be competitive about their misery, trying to outdo other people's sadness.
This is the worst.
Watch out for people who constantly, even gleefully, talk about their failures and sadness.
Anyone who criticizes the failures of others, or seems overly cynical, might have a toxic personality worth avoiding. , Insecure people are unable to create their own sense of self-worth, and often cling on to others to get it.
While not always toxic, these reality-TV hopefuls can get nasty when they don't get the attention they crave.
If you don't give it to them, they'll find a way to make it themselves.
And no one needs that kind of drama in their life.
Humble-brags ("I can't believe I only made fifteen sales today") and obsessive posting might be a sign of this toxic personality.
These kinds of people often "one-up" everyone around them, or always swing conversation back to something about them. , Instead of supporting others, gossips feed on envy.
Gossip can be thrilling sometimes (duh), making you feel close with your fellow gossipers.
If you've ever gotten caught up in gossip, you're not alone.
But you should know that, once your back is turned, constant gossipers will start talking about you.
Gossipers constantly compare themselves to others, which is a good way to set yourself up for disappointment and failure.
Don't worry about your neighbors, worry about your own backyard. -
Step 3: make some space.
-
Step 4: Pay attention to body language and tone of voice.
-
Step 5: Keep your eyes and ears peeled for hotheads.
-
Step 6: Stay away from the cynics.
-
Step 7: Stand away from the attention seekers.
-
Step 8: Keep the gossip girls and rumor mill men at bay.
Detailed Guide
We all have our down days.
But when it comes to toxic people, the blues are a constant rain cloud.
And they want everyone to be just as wet and miserable as them.
If you never see emotions other than anger, sadness, and jealousy, it is best to steer clear of that personality.
Keep an eye out for the following toxic traits:
Jittery, nervous energy.
Constant whining and complaining Clinginess and dependency Criticism, usually aimed everywhere Negative or cynical worldview
When you walk into the store to buy a new box of Cheerios, you know immediately what kind of mood the cashier is in.
You can see it, even feel it, in your interaction.
You can do this with your friends and coworkers, too! Even if you don't see the tell-tale signs, you know when something is off, and you know to avoid some people.
Trust yourself
-- there are plenty of happy people out there without trying out all the sourpusses. , Listen to the sounds made, more than what people actually say.
You can hear it when someone is just going through the motions.
How do people relate to you? What do they seem to be thinking when they speak? Bad body language looks like a sullen, sulky teenager
-- shoulders down, lack of eye-contact, big, hostile gestures, etc.
Good body language looks like George Washington across the Delaware: back straight, chin up, shoulders back, etc. , Anger, shouting, and negative criticism are major signs of a toxic personality.
Angry people sometimes need a lot of help, but it's not your job to be their punching bag.
It is definitely not your job to try and fix them! Staying around a person like this will cause you to become angry too.
So kick back and find someone else to talk to: you'll have a lot more fun.
People who have control over their emotions don't usually feel the need to shout, so watch out for the loud ones.
Watch out for quiet,simmering anger as well.
Some people won't say much, but will use poor body language and bottle it up instead.
These people lash out at odd times, when anger doesn't seem called for.
Luckily, this is basically a neon "Personal BioHazard" sign.
If you have to work with angry people, never stoop to anger
-- you'll just rile them up further.
Keep in professional, polite, and quick, and just walk out if they lose their temper.
They'll hate you for it, but they'll learn their lesson sooner or later. , Do you know someone who finds the darkness in everything? Much like your parents on Thanksgiving, misery loves company.
These people will always complain about something, never see the good in anything, and claim they hate everything.
It's exhausting just thinking about it, which is why they'll try to drag you into their little pity party.
People with very negative worldview will often be competitive about their misery, trying to outdo other people's sadness.
This is the worst.
Watch out for people who constantly, even gleefully, talk about their failures and sadness.
Anyone who criticizes the failures of others, or seems overly cynical, might have a toxic personality worth avoiding. , Insecure people are unable to create their own sense of self-worth, and often cling on to others to get it.
While not always toxic, these reality-TV hopefuls can get nasty when they don't get the attention they crave.
If you don't give it to them, they'll find a way to make it themselves.
And no one needs that kind of drama in their life.
Humble-brags ("I can't believe I only made fifteen sales today") and obsessive posting might be a sign of this toxic personality.
These kinds of people often "one-up" everyone around them, or always swing conversation back to something about them. , Instead of supporting others, gossips feed on envy.
Gossip can be thrilling sometimes (duh), making you feel close with your fellow gossipers.
If you've ever gotten caught up in gossip, you're not alone.
But you should know that, once your back is turned, constant gossipers will start talking about you.
Gossipers constantly compare themselves to others, which is a good way to set yourself up for disappointment and failure.
Don't worry about your neighbors, worry about your own backyard.
About the Author
Theresa Fisher
Experienced content creator specializing in pet care guides and tutorials.
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