How to Stop Body Policing
Understand the root of body policing., Understand what constitutes body policing., Understand the effects of body policing., Expose yourself to alternative types of beauty., Look at things objectively., Think carefully before you speak., Have a...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Understand the root of body policing.
There is a psychological root to all behavior, good and bad. Body policing is largely rooted in society's attitudes toward women and personal appearance in general
- men can experience it too, after all.
The following trends are involved:
Presenting women as items of attraction.
Female appearance is a big focus of men and women themselves.
Note how often women appear as background "eye candy" in music videos and how they are more frequently depicted naked or in revealing clothes in movies.
Treating appearance as a women's biggest asset.
If a women is described as having "a good personality" many people will assume she's unattractive.
An accomplished woman will still get questions about her clothes from reporters, regardless of what she is accomplished in.
Acting as if a woman's body is not her own.
When men see a woman dressed in revealing clothes, they usually assume she wants male attention, not that she wants to stay cool or simply likes those clothes.
A man will continue hitting on a woman unless she states that she has a boyfriend or is otherwise "taken." -
Step 2: Understand what constitutes body policing.
The following are some examples of body policing. "Guys would like you better if you lost some weight." "You should really start shaving your legs." "I think it's time you started wearing some makeup!" "Dude, you're so skinny.
You couldn't lift if you tried." "Don't wear such skimpy clothes.
You don't have the body for it."
Criticizing a person's appearance, especially when they're young, can have a devastating effect on zir self-esteem and make zir feel inadequate.
This in turn can lead to depression, eating disorders, anxiety, and suicide., If you can broaden your view of beauty, you will be less inclined to instinctively judge someone's appearance.
Examples of alternative beauty include:
Plus-sized models.
Actresses of the past.
They're not stick-thin at all.
Frida Kahlo, a painter.
Many characters on British television.
The characters of Steven Universe. , Try to put away the ideas of beauty society has instilled in you and look at things for what they are.
Is there anything inherently bad
- anything
- about a woman with thick eyebrows, a skinny man, or a plus-sized girl? Are these things unattractive in and of themselves? No!, You might say critical things without thinking about it, so be careful to filter your words.
It's not so much about political correctness as politeness and respect. Generally it's best not to deal in comparisons. (Lighter/heavier, better/worse, etc.), Judging your own appearance is hurtful to you.
Accept how you look and see it all in a positive light., Often people who are not conventionally beautiful will bring down those that are.
For instance, some curvy girls will criticize and deride skinny girls.
This is just as hurtful as when it is the other way around: there is still someone being brought down and being hurt.
Keep in mind that nobody's status is inherently higher than anyone else's due to appearance., Many people unconsciously comment on others' appearances.
A good-intentioned person will probably see the issue if it's brought up instead of borne silently.
Some things you could say are: "It's kind of hurtful when you say things like that.
I know that's not your intent, but it still hurts." "Please don't talk about my girlfriend's weight like that.
It's not kind." "Hey, you shave your legs, and that's your business.
I don't shave mine and that's my business.
End of story."
If the person isn't totally convinced (or they're just mean), turn it around and tell them how it feels. "You could stand to lose some weight." "So could you." "How would you feel if someone just started criticizing your face?" "I know you wouldn't like it if someone talked about you like that, so don't do the same to me." -
Step 3: Understand the effects of body policing.
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Step 4: Expose yourself to alternative types of beauty.
-
Step 5: Look at things objectively.
-
Step 6: Think carefully before you speak.
-
Step 7: Have a positive view of yourself
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Step 8: Do not bring anyone down to boost anyone up.
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Step 9: Indicate that it is unappreciated.
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Step 10: Turn it around.
Detailed Guide
There is a psychological root to all behavior, good and bad. Body policing is largely rooted in society's attitudes toward women and personal appearance in general
- men can experience it too, after all.
The following trends are involved:
Presenting women as items of attraction.
Female appearance is a big focus of men and women themselves.
Note how often women appear as background "eye candy" in music videos and how they are more frequently depicted naked or in revealing clothes in movies.
Treating appearance as a women's biggest asset.
If a women is described as having "a good personality" many people will assume she's unattractive.
An accomplished woman will still get questions about her clothes from reporters, regardless of what she is accomplished in.
Acting as if a woman's body is not her own.
When men see a woman dressed in revealing clothes, they usually assume she wants male attention, not that she wants to stay cool or simply likes those clothes.
A man will continue hitting on a woman unless she states that she has a boyfriend or is otherwise "taken."
The following are some examples of body policing. "Guys would like you better if you lost some weight." "You should really start shaving your legs." "I think it's time you started wearing some makeup!" "Dude, you're so skinny.
You couldn't lift if you tried." "Don't wear such skimpy clothes.
You don't have the body for it."
Criticizing a person's appearance, especially when they're young, can have a devastating effect on zir self-esteem and make zir feel inadequate.
This in turn can lead to depression, eating disorders, anxiety, and suicide., If you can broaden your view of beauty, you will be less inclined to instinctively judge someone's appearance.
Examples of alternative beauty include:
Plus-sized models.
Actresses of the past.
They're not stick-thin at all.
Frida Kahlo, a painter.
Many characters on British television.
The characters of Steven Universe. , Try to put away the ideas of beauty society has instilled in you and look at things for what they are.
Is there anything inherently bad
- anything
- about a woman with thick eyebrows, a skinny man, or a plus-sized girl? Are these things unattractive in and of themselves? No!, You might say critical things without thinking about it, so be careful to filter your words.
It's not so much about political correctness as politeness and respect. Generally it's best not to deal in comparisons. (Lighter/heavier, better/worse, etc.), Judging your own appearance is hurtful to you.
Accept how you look and see it all in a positive light., Often people who are not conventionally beautiful will bring down those that are.
For instance, some curvy girls will criticize and deride skinny girls.
This is just as hurtful as when it is the other way around: there is still someone being brought down and being hurt.
Keep in mind that nobody's status is inherently higher than anyone else's due to appearance., Many people unconsciously comment on others' appearances.
A good-intentioned person will probably see the issue if it's brought up instead of borne silently.
Some things you could say are: "It's kind of hurtful when you say things like that.
I know that's not your intent, but it still hurts." "Please don't talk about my girlfriend's weight like that.
It's not kind." "Hey, you shave your legs, and that's your business.
I don't shave mine and that's my business.
End of story."
If the person isn't totally convinced (or they're just mean), turn it around and tell them how it feels. "You could stand to lose some weight." "So could you." "How would you feel if someone just started criticizing your face?" "I know you wouldn't like it if someone talked about you like that, so don't do the same to me."
About the Author
Karen Jimenez
Creates helpful guides on creative arts to inspire and educate readers.
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