How to Stop Thinking of Something or Someone
Write your thought(s) down., Imagine the thought., Stop the thought., Practice.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Write your thought(s) down.
Your thoughts are distracting you from your daily activities and causing you unhappiness, anxiety or worry, so the first thing you must do is put them on paper.
Write down all your upsetting thoughts in order of the most stressful to the least stressful.
For example, if you keep thinking you might lose your job, your list could look something like this:
1.
How will I be able to pay my bills and take care of my child?
2.
What if I can't find a new job?
3.
I'll be so embarrassed if I'm escorted by security out of the office with my belongings in a box.
You're going to begin your practice with the least-stressful thought. -
Step 2: Imagine the thought.
Sit or lie down in a private place.
Close your eyes.
Imagine a situation in which you might have this stressful thought. , Set a timer, watch or other alarm for three minutes.
Then focus on your unwanted thought.
When the timer or alarm goes off, shout "Stop!" That's your cue to empty your mind of that thought.
Think of one intentional thought (the beach, etc.) and keep your mind fixed on that image or thought for 30 seconds.
If the upsetting thought comes back during that time, shout "Stop!" again.
Practicing meditation or yoga may help calm and clear your mind.
You can stand up when you say "Stop" if you'd like or snap your fingers or clap your hands.
These actions reinforce the "Stop" command and further interrupt your thought.
Instead of using a timer, you can tape-record yourself shouting "Stop!" at one-, two- and three-minute intervals and use the recording to do the thought-stopping exercise.
When you hear your recorded voice say "Stop," empty your mind for 30 seconds. , Repeat this exercise until the thought goes away on command.
Then try the exercise again and interrupt the thought by saying "Stop" in a normal voice rather than a shout.
Once your normal voice is able to stop the thought, try whispering "Stop." Over time, you can just imagine hearing "Stop" inside your mind.
At this point, you should be able to stop the thought whenever and wherever it occurs.
Once you've achieved that level of control, choose the next thought on your list and continue thought-stopping.
This method will not stop unwanted thoughts immediately.
What it does do is help "put brakes" on these thoughts and gradually lessen the hold they have over you.
In this practice, there also has to be acceptance that these thoughts are here at present and to tolerate them.
Thoughts can be very distracting, distressing, and when a person feels out of control about it, it is all the worse.
But accepting the fact they are there, present, and to be less reactive about it actually helps them go away. -
Step 3: Stop the thought.
-
Step 4: Practice.
Detailed Guide
Your thoughts are distracting you from your daily activities and causing you unhappiness, anxiety or worry, so the first thing you must do is put them on paper.
Write down all your upsetting thoughts in order of the most stressful to the least stressful.
For example, if you keep thinking you might lose your job, your list could look something like this:
1.
How will I be able to pay my bills and take care of my child?
2.
What if I can't find a new job?
3.
I'll be so embarrassed if I'm escorted by security out of the office with my belongings in a box.
You're going to begin your practice with the least-stressful thought.
Sit or lie down in a private place.
Close your eyes.
Imagine a situation in which you might have this stressful thought. , Set a timer, watch or other alarm for three minutes.
Then focus on your unwanted thought.
When the timer or alarm goes off, shout "Stop!" That's your cue to empty your mind of that thought.
Think of one intentional thought (the beach, etc.) and keep your mind fixed on that image or thought for 30 seconds.
If the upsetting thought comes back during that time, shout "Stop!" again.
Practicing meditation or yoga may help calm and clear your mind.
You can stand up when you say "Stop" if you'd like or snap your fingers or clap your hands.
These actions reinforce the "Stop" command and further interrupt your thought.
Instead of using a timer, you can tape-record yourself shouting "Stop!" at one-, two- and three-minute intervals and use the recording to do the thought-stopping exercise.
When you hear your recorded voice say "Stop," empty your mind for 30 seconds. , Repeat this exercise until the thought goes away on command.
Then try the exercise again and interrupt the thought by saying "Stop" in a normal voice rather than a shout.
Once your normal voice is able to stop the thought, try whispering "Stop." Over time, you can just imagine hearing "Stop" inside your mind.
At this point, you should be able to stop the thought whenever and wherever it occurs.
Once you've achieved that level of control, choose the next thought on your list and continue thought-stopping.
This method will not stop unwanted thoughts immediately.
What it does do is help "put brakes" on these thoughts and gradually lessen the hold they have over you.
In this practice, there also has to be acceptance that these thoughts are here at present and to tolerate them.
Thoughts can be very distracting, distressing, and when a person feels out of control about it, it is all the worse.
But accepting the fact they are there, present, and to be less reactive about it actually helps them go away.
About the Author
Lori Bishop
Enthusiastic about teaching creative arts techniques through clear, step-by-step guides.
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