How to Turn Cool After Junior High
Learn who you are., Listen., Develop personal integrity., Do not be a fake., Play a sport., Take care of yourself., Don't be pressured into things you are not ready for, like sex., Never,ever, start doing drugs just because your friends are doing it.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Learn who you are.
This means figuring out what you want to do in life, and how you want to achieve it. -
Step 2: Listen.
Be aware of others around you, don't be self-centered. , Integrity is the most important rule of social interaction.
Figure out your ideals, what you think is actually important, and try to act sincerely on a moral instinct.
This has nothing to do with religion or self-righteous political views.
It means act sincerely on your conscious.
Do not talk behind anyone's back.
It will always come back to haunt you.
This is the easiest rule.
People will notice you are unwilling to sell anyone out or take pleasure in other people's unhappiness and it will inspire trust, and it is good for your heart and guts to not be a gossip.
Do not insult or tease people.
Even if you have spent lots of time yourself being belittled and relish the feeling of picking on someone weaker than you, don't.
It is not dignified or kind, it shows no self-restraint or discipline.
Do not, however, be afraid to stand up for yourself when someone does, or says something cruel to you.
This might sound antithetical to the advice about empathy and keeping your mouth shut, but part of integrity is self respect and being willing to take a risk to defend yourself and other people against intentionally malicious behavior.
If you just meekly slink away, or laugh it off and a bully thinks you are unwilling to stand up for yourself, they will use you again and again as a target.
If someone is disrespectful to you, shut them down and shut them down hard; this is the one situation in which I advocate extreme cruelty.
Never physical violence, just the absolute meanest and most specific insult you can wrench from the darkest part of your mind.
You know the people you go to school with.
You know they all have weaknesses.
Just because we're all growing up doesn't mean it isn't still Lord of the Flies out there.
Don't show anger, don't cry, don't get flustered, just give them what they have coming, and it is better if it is funny.
They won't target you again.
This is like karate though, never to be used as attack, only as defense. , Phoniness is one of the easiest traps to fall into in an attempt to not be a loser. "Gee, if I just pretend to be into what those dudes are into, I'll be cool!" No, you will end up looking like an even bigger loser.
Copying the clothes, tastes, or slang of someone always makes you look like a poser.
If you like someone's style, or someone's taste in music, there are subtle to ways to integrate things into your own life, but do not wholesale rip anything off insincerely.
It is not fun, and it is obvious, especially if you don't know what you're talking about.
Join a club.
If you don't like sports, try dance, yearbook,etc.
This will allow you to meet more people. , Physical activity keeps you from getting depressed and pushed your mind away from morbid self-attention.
When you are pushed physically, you don't have time or energy to focus on all your flaws or what someone said about you, or how bad you feel.
If you hate teams, try track.
If you hate spectator sports, try ski club.
If you don't like school organizations, try skateboarding.
It helps you develop focus, courage, and confidence and it helps you have a natural bond and conversation topic with teammates.
It is also good for your body, and a healthy body looks good. , Since we have brought up looks, let's talk about dressing and general physical upkeep.
For girls or boys, the Internet makes it much easier to buy clothes, in case they don't have your size, or you simply don't like the clothes in stores.
Beware of scams though, always be careful when on the Internet.
Don't be fake.
Nobody like that.
Just be true to yourself, and other people will too. , Always talk to someone you trust if you have questions or need help. , This will ruin your life, and affect your family.
Just don't do it. -
Step 3: Develop personal integrity.
-
Step 4: Do not be a fake.
-
Step 5: Play a sport.
-
Step 6: Take care of yourself.
-
Step 7: Don't be pressured into things you are not ready for
-
Step 8: like sex.
-
Step 9: start doing drugs just because your friends are doing it.
Detailed Guide
This means figuring out what you want to do in life, and how you want to achieve it.
Be aware of others around you, don't be self-centered. , Integrity is the most important rule of social interaction.
Figure out your ideals, what you think is actually important, and try to act sincerely on a moral instinct.
This has nothing to do with religion or self-righteous political views.
It means act sincerely on your conscious.
Do not talk behind anyone's back.
It will always come back to haunt you.
This is the easiest rule.
People will notice you are unwilling to sell anyone out or take pleasure in other people's unhappiness and it will inspire trust, and it is good for your heart and guts to not be a gossip.
Do not insult or tease people.
Even if you have spent lots of time yourself being belittled and relish the feeling of picking on someone weaker than you, don't.
It is not dignified or kind, it shows no self-restraint or discipline.
Do not, however, be afraid to stand up for yourself when someone does, or says something cruel to you.
This might sound antithetical to the advice about empathy and keeping your mouth shut, but part of integrity is self respect and being willing to take a risk to defend yourself and other people against intentionally malicious behavior.
If you just meekly slink away, or laugh it off and a bully thinks you are unwilling to stand up for yourself, they will use you again and again as a target.
If someone is disrespectful to you, shut them down and shut them down hard; this is the one situation in which I advocate extreme cruelty.
Never physical violence, just the absolute meanest and most specific insult you can wrench from the darkest part of your mind.
You know the people you go to school with.
You know they all have weaknesses.
Just because we're all growing up doesn't mean it isn't still Lord of the Flies out there.
Don't show anger, don't cry, don't get flustered, just give them what they have coming, and it is better if it is funny.
They won't target you again.
This is like karate though, never to be used as attack, only as defense. , Phoniness is one of the easiest traps to fall into in an attempt to not be a loser. "Gee, if I just pretend to be into what those dudes are into, I'll be cool!" No, you will end up looking like an even bigger loser.
Copying the clothes, tastes, or slang of someone always makes you look like a poser.
If you like someone's style, or someone's taste in music, there are subtle to ways to integrate things into your own life, but do not wholesale rip anything off insincerely.
It is not fun, and it is obvious, especially if you don't know what you're talking about.
Join a club.
If you don't like sports, try dance, yearbook,etc.
This will allow you to meet more people. , Physical activity keeps you from getting depressed and pushed your mind away from morbid self-attention.
When you are pushed physically, you don't have time or energy to focus on all your flaws or what someone said about you, or how bad you feel.
If you hate teams, try track.
If you hate spectator sports, try ski club.
If you don't like school organizations, try skateboarding.
It helps you develop focus, courage, and confidence and it helps you have a natural bond and conversation topic with teammates.
It is also good for your body, and a healthy body looks good. , Since we have brought up looks, let's talk about dressing and general physical upkeep.
For girls or boys, the Internet makes it much easier to buy clothes, in case they don't have your size, or you simply don't like the clothes in stores.
Beware of scams though, always be careful when on the Internet.
Don't be fake.
Nobody like that.
Just be true to yourself, and other people will too. , Always talk to someone you trust if you have questions or need help. , This will ruin your life, and affect your family.
Just don't do it.
About the Author
Doris Turner
Professional writer focused on creating easy-to-follow lifestyle tutorials.
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