How to Walk Away from a Fight
Keep your wits about you., Create physical distance., Assess whether or not it'll work to talk., Ignore the insults or negative comments your opponent is flinging your way., Avoid escalating an argument., When trying to avoid a fight, keep eye...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Keep your wits about you.
Anger, panic, fear, and frustration are all emotions guaranteed to cause you to fall apart and see red rather than think clearly about what is happening.
This is all the more reasons walking away is the best option often, to create the distance needed to cool down.
It's highly recommended that you learn to avoid getting yourself into situations that threaten fights as an inevitable outcome.
Keep an eye out for danger signs, like the building up of high tension, the presence of alcohol, a too-late night, or somebody who is upset over something/somebody else already, and stay away.
Attempt to defuse the situation as soon as it arises. -
Step 2: Create physical distance.
The other person is likely as riled and angry or afraid as you are and this makes things volatile.
By stepping back or standing away, you make the first call to not engage any further in fighting.
Keep your distance––if the other person comes closer, move away again. , In many cases, the emotions are just too heightened for a discussion.
However, if it seems that talking might work, throw some hooks as an invitation to talk instead of fight.
For example:
Say something like: "Hey buddy.
I don't want this.
You don't want this.
Let's be reasonable and talk it out." This may not be the right time to work out the deepest, darkest motives of the other person.
But it is a good opportunity to acknowledge his or her anger or frustration in ways that show you are paying full attention to their grievance.
Avoid slinging shots, such as saying things like "this is all your fault"
"you're gutless" or "you think with your fist, not your brain".
These sorts of comments will just further inflame things. , This is to be expected and you should be ready for it.
You might hear yourself being called a coward, weak and all manner of angry and taunting things.
These are the last offenses of the angry opponent who sees a chance for a fight deflating, the last ditch efforts to rile you into returning to the fight.
Recognize them for what they are and don't personalize them.
You may hear taunts related to members of your family or other people you care about.
Again, let it roll like water off the duck's back.
Your opponent is trying all sorts of tactics and nobody's dignity is being maligned simply because this person says ridiculous things.
Don't look on it as an issue of pride––look on it as an issue of an idiot straining to provoke you. , There may be principles you want to stand on, points you wish to ram home and views that you think are irrevocably right.
You may think that your opponent is all wrong.
But none of these beliefs are either wholly accurate or helpful to you.
The important thing is avoiding a fight, not arguing petty points about the disagreement you two have.
Don't insult your opponent or become angry with him or her.
Just stay calm and do your best to convince him or her that a fight is a bad idea.
If necessary, acknowledge the other person has a valid argument for whatever it is that's instigating the fight, even if you're seemingly in the right.
The rights and wrongs of the matter can be untangled later, when everyone has cooled down. , Discuss the problem and apologize for anything you have caused, even if you're right.
While attempting to defuse the situation, it is important to keep your hands in a defensible yet non-aggressive position.
Moreover, prepare to defend yourself mentally just in case, as follows:
Be ready to block sucker punches to your face/body, but not in a "fighting stance".
Use the "prayer position" with both palms pressed together, which looks non-threatening, but keeps your hands up near your face.
Use the "stay back" position, hands facing your aggressor palms outward.
Use the "I'm thinking" position, with a hand on your chin/head.
Remember; try to seem natural while you do this.
Keep protected at all times. , Remember there is no shame in running away––you did your best.
Walking away from a fight doesn't determine that you're a coward (no matter how much the other person screams this); it determines that you're mature and thinking responsibly, about not just yourself but about the other person too, and families and friends who will be affected by the repercussions.
Above all, remind yourself the alternatives could be much worse:
You could die, get crippled, or end in jail.
Remember what's important to you and how a fight could impact your life. , If the other person is very angry, they may simply attack you from behind.
When walking away, face the person who is causing your trouble, to prevent them from attacking you from behind, sight unseen.
Back away, keep an eye on the person and only turn to actually leave when it is safe to do so, such as in the doorway or getting into your car, etc.
Glance back now and then while seeking to defuse the situation, to check for potential escape routes.
Do not turn your head as you look back. -
Step 3: Assess whether or not it'll work to talk.
-
Step 4: Ignore the insults or negative comments your opponent is flinging your way.
-
Step 5: Avoid escalating an argument.
-
Step 6: When trying to avoid a fight
-
Step 7: keep eye contact and try to keep an eye on the hands.
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Step 8: When all else fails
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Step 9: turn away and leave.
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Step 10: Be careful when you try to walk away.
Detailed Guide
Anger, panic, fear, and frustration are all emotions guaranteed to cause you to fall apart and see red rather than think clearly about what is happening.
This is all the more reasons walking away is the best option often, to create the distance needed to cool down.
It's highly recommended that you learn to avoid getting yourself into situations that threaten fights as an inevitable outcome.
Keep an eye out for danger signs, like the building up of high tension, the presence of alcohol, a too-late night, or somebody who is upset over something/somebody else already, and stay away.
Attempt to defuse the situation as soon as it arises.
The other person is likely as riled and angry or afraid as you are and this makes things volatile.
By stepping back or standing away, you make the first call to not engage any further in fighting.
Keep your distance––if the other person comes closer, move away again. , In many cases, the emotions are just too heightened for a discussion.
However, if it seems that talking might work, throw some hooks as an invitation to talk instead of fight.
For example:
Say something like: "Hey buddy.
I don't want this.
You don't want this.
Let's be reasonable and talk it out." This may not be the right time to work out the deepest, darkest motives of the other person.
But it is a good opportunity to acknowledge his or her anger or frustration in ways that show you are paying full attention to their grievance.
Avoid slinging shots, such as saying things like "this is all your fault"
"you're gutless" or "you think with your fist, not your brain".
These sorts of comments will just further inflame things. , This is to be expected and you should be ready for it.
You might hear yourself being called a coward, weak and all manner of angry and taunting things.
These are the last offenses of the angry opponent who sees a chance for a fight deflating, the last ditch efforts to rile you into returning to the fight.
Recognize them for what they are and don't personalize them.
You may hear taunts related to members of your family or other people you care about.
Again, let it roll like water off the duck's back.
Your opponent is trying all sorts of tactics and nobody's dignity is being maligned simply because this person says ridiculous things.
Don't look on it as an issue of pride––look on it as an issue of an idiot straining to provoke you. , There may be principles you want to stand on, points you wish to ram home and views that you think are irrevocably right.
You may think that your opponent is all wrong.
But none of these beliefs are either wholly accurate or helpful to you.
The important thing is avoiding a fight, not arguing petty points about the disagreement you two have.
Don't insult your opponent or become angry with him or her.
Just stay calm and do your best to convince him or her that a fight is a bad idea.
If necessary, acknowledge the other person has a valid argument for whatever it is that's instigating the fight, even if you're seemingly in the right.
The rights and wrongs of the matter can be untangled later, when everyone has cooled down. , Discuss the problem and apologize for anything you have caused, even if you're right.
While attempting to defuse the situation, it is important to keep your hands in a defensible yet non-aggressive position.
Moreover, prepare to defend yourself mentally just in case, as follows:
Be ready to block sucker punches to your face/body, but not in a "fighting stance".
Use the "prayer position" with both palms pressed together, which looks non-threatening, but keeps your hands up near your face.
Use the "stay back" position, hands facing your aggressor palms outward.
Use the "I'm thinking" position, with a hand on your chin/head.
Remember; try to seem natural while you do this.
Keep protected at all times. , Remember there is no shame in running away––you did your best.
Walking away from a fight doesn't determine that you're a coward (no matter how much the other person screams this); it determines that you're mature and thinking responsibly, about not just yourself but about the other person too, and families and friends who will be affected by the repercussions.
Above all, remind yourself the alternatives could be much worse:
You could die, get crippled, or end in jail.
Remember what's important to you and how a fight could impact your life. , If the other person is very angry, they may simply attack you from behind.
When walking away, face the person who is causing your trouble, to prevent them from attacking you from behind, sight unseen.
Back away, keep an eye on the person and only turn to actually leave when it is safe to do so, such as in the doorway or getting into your car, etc.
Glance back now and then while seeking to defuse the situation, to check for potential escape routes.
Do not turn your head as you look back.
About the Author
Marilyn Long
Marilyn Long is an experienced writer with over 23 years of expertise in lifestyle and practical guides. Passionate about sharing practical knowledge, Marilyn creates easy-to-follow guides that help readers achieve their goals.
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