How to Treat a Man So That He Doesn't Cheat
Keep in touch throughout the day., Improve how you argue., Drop the constant criticism., Be soft on the person, tough on the issue., Use words of affection.
Step-by-Step Guide
-
Step 1: Keep in touch throughout the day.
Both partners should work hard not to withdraw.
In order to have a positive relationship, you need to communicate on a constant basis.
It’s important not to let things fester.
You need to be so on top of your relationship that you spot little changes in the dynamic before they become big changes.
Talk to him about his day – every day.
Text him an “I love you” or call him during the day to see how his day is going.
Don’t do this so much you’re disrupting his work, but do it here or there to let him know you’re thinking about him.
Every single day ask him this question: "How was your day?" This lets him know you care, and it creates bonding to share positive or even negative experiences.
Don't forget the art of listening.
It's really important in relationships. -
Step 2: Improve how you argue.
Couples who "argue well" have a better chance of avoiding infidelity.
Every couple argues.
But there are ways to make sure arguments don't turn into something more lasting.
If there is some simmering unresolved issue, don’t dodge it.
Address it by communicating your thoughts and feelings.
However, avoid judging language.
Rather than chastising him for not doing something, tell him how you feel about it.
If you have concerns about something, frame them as "I feel such and such" rather than using blaming language, such as "why didn't you, etc." Keep your comments focused on the "I." Use plural pronouns like "we" and "us" and "our." Studies have found couples who do so don't have as lasting of arguments.
Don't yell, and don't go negative and say things you will regret.
If he needs space, give it to him, and continue the conversation in the morning.
Try the 48-hour rule.
If you're upset about something your partner did, wait 48 hours before saying anything, and see if you're still upset.
This approach will help you address the topic with less emotionalism. , Yes, sometimes he doesn’t put away his socks.
Or he came home too late or forgot to do something around the house.
Just make sure you don’t harp on him every single day about this or that.
Men want to feel appreciated too.
So avoid negative relationship habits such as blaming, threatening, punishing, or criticizing.
You could make a list of things you nag him about and cross out half of them to consciously reduce the criticism.
Avoid generalizing statements.
This is ineffective communication.
Words like "never," "always," or "every time" make a statement too generalizing.
For example, avoid statements like "How come you never come home on time?" Don’t complain about his diet.
This can really drive men crazy.
Better yet, make him his favorite meals now and then so he looks forward to coming home. , If you are upset about something he did, when communicating with him, separate the person from the issue.
Remind him you think he's a good person, or you know he didn't mean to make a mistake, but you felt sad when he did (whatever behavior upset you).
Ineffective communicators do the opposite of this.
They personalize issues, attacking their partner, while minimizing the issue at hand. , When's the last time you told him you love him? You can never say it enough.
Tell him it before you fall asleep at night or when he leaves for work.
Try to say it once a day.
Pay him compliments.
Notice if he got his hair cut.
Point it out if he's wearing a shirt in a color that looks good with his eyes.
Using terms of endearment
- sweetheart, dear, my love
- creates bonding and reminds him you care.
Thread them into the day's conversation. -
Step 3: Drop the constant criticism.
-
Step 4: Be soft on the person
-
Step 5: tough on the issue.
-
Step 6: Use words of affection.
Detailed Guide
Both partners should work hard not to withdraw.
In order to have a positive relationship, you need to communicate on a constant basis.
It’s important not to let things fester.
You need to be so on top of your relationship that you spot little changes in the dynamic before they become big changes.
Talk to him about his day – every day.
Text him an “I love you” or call him during the day to see how his day is going.
Don’t do this so much you’re disrupting his work, but do it here or there to let him know you’re thinking about him.
Every single day ask him this question: "How was your day?" This lets him know you care, and it creates bonding to share positive or even negative experiences.
Don't forget the art of listening.
It's really important in relationships.
Couples who "argue well" have a better chance of avoiding infidelity.
Every couple argues.
But there are ways to make sure arguments don't turn into something more lasting.
If there is some simmering unresolved issue, don’t dodge it.
Address it by communicating your thoughts and feelings.
However, avoid judging language.
Rather than chastising him for not doing something, tell him how you feel about it.
If you have concerns about something, frame them as "I feel such and such" rather than using blaming language, such as "why didn't you, etc." Keep your comments focused on the "I." Use plural pronouns like "we" and "us" and "our." Studies have found couples who do so don't have as lasting of arguments.
Don't yell, and don't go negative and say things you will regret.
If he needs space, give it to him, and continue the conversation in the morning.
Try the 48-hour rule.
If you're upset about something your partner did, wait 48 hours before saying anything, and see if you're still upset.
This approach will help you address the topic with less emotionalism. , Yes, sometimes he doesn’t put away his socks.
Or he came home too late or forgot to do something around the house.
Just make sure you don’t harp on him every single day about this or that.
Men want to feel appreciated too.
So avoid negative relationship habits such as blaming, threatening, punishing, or criticizing.
You could make a list of things you nag him about and cross out half of them to consciously reduce the criticism.
Avoid generalizing statements.
This is ineffective communication.
Words like "never," "always," or "every time" make a statement too generalizing.
For example, avoid statements like "How come you never come home on time?" Don’t complain about his diet.
This can really drive men crazy.
Better yet, make him his favorite meals now and then so he looks forward to coming home. , If you are upset about something he did, when communicating with him, separate the person from the issue.
Remind him you think he's a good person, or you know he didn't mean to make a mistake, but you felt sad when he did (whatever behavior upset you).
Ineffective communicators do the opposite of this.
They personalize issues, attacking their partner, while minimizing the issue at hand. , When's the last time you told him you love him? You can never say it enough.
Tell him it before you fall asleep at night or when he leaves for work.
Try to say it once a day.
Pay him compliments.
Notice if he got his hair cut.
Point it out if he's wearing a shirt in a color that looks good with his eyes.
Using terms of endearment
- sweetheart, dear, my love
- creates bonding and reminds him you care.
Thread them into the day's conversation.
About the Author
Daniel Hayes
Brings years of experience writing about home improvement and related subjects.
Rate This Guide
How helpful was this guide? Click to rate: