How to Date a Lawyer
Understand that the firm “owns” your target., Prepare to have spirited conversations., Embrace your own career and independence., Decide if this is the life for you.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Understand that the firm “owns” your target.
In most cases, unless your attorney works for the government, his/her entire career is based on billable hours.
This means that the law firm partners will be counting on the attorney to work on cases as often as possible--including weekends and evenings.
Be cool when he/she has to cancel dinner or weekend plans.
Be flexible with your time and understand that if he/she has to cancel at the last time, the decision may not be his/her own.
Ask about your attorney date’s goals.
He/she may want to make partner relatively quickly, which means that more hours in the office or in court may be required.
Have a flexible approach to dating.
You may have arranged for a romantic dinner for two at a restaurant that took months to obtain a reservation, but then he/she has to work.
Instead of sulking or ditching him/her, create a picnic dinner and show up at the office instead. -
Step 2: Prepare to have spirited conversations.
While not all attorneys thrive on full-blown debate opportunities with everyone, chances are if you are dating a lawyer, he/she will enjoy engaging in lively conversation on a variety of topics.
Avoid being intimidated by his/her law degree if you are in a debate.
Just because your date went to law school does not put him/her in a position of power over you.
Be confident in your own knowledge and intelligence and be comfortable to discuss a wide range of topics.
Learn when to agree to disagree.
There’s no point getting into a spat over a difference of opinion.
While perhaps your attorney mate may be used to a fiery conversation with colleagues and then go back to business as usual, let him/her know that once things get a little too heated you’d rather just agree to disagree (rather than get into a knock down, drag out fight).
Identify topics that are off limits.
Perhaps its politics or religion, but find those hot button topics that make your blood boil (and where you differ in opinion) and agree to leave those topics off the table. , An attorney is going to be happier dating someone who is just was passionate about his/her career so instead of waiting for the phone to ring, dig deep into your job or passion.
Adopt the “work hard, play hard” mantra.
If you put in a 12-hour day you may not feel like hitting the clubs after work.
However, commit to a fun activity once the weekend hits such as a pub-crawl, venturing into the city or even getting out of town.
Make him/her wait for you sometimes too.
Your attorney boyfriend/girlfriend doesn’t dump work the minute you snap your fingers so don’t be expected to do the same every time he/she has a free minute.
Decide whether you will discuss work while on dates or leave it behind.
Some couples do better if work is kept out of the relationship, whereas others thrive on discussing what they did during their professional day. , If you prefer to date someone who can be at your beck and call at a moment’s notice you may be better off dating someone from another profession.
Many non-attorney spouses spend a considerable amount of time on their own.
Whether he/she is in trial or traveling, getting serious with an attorney may mean that you won’t have as much time together as you would with someone from another discipline.
Look beyond the money.
While many attorneys make a sizable income, it comes at a price.
Decide what is most important to you--can you live comfortably, but with limited time with your partner or is money not enough? -
Step 3: Embrace your own career and independence.
-
Step 4: Decide if this is the life for you.
Detailed Guide
In most cases, unless your attorney works for the government, his/her entire career is based on billable hours.
This means that the law firm partners will be counting on the attorney to work on cases as often as possible--including weekends and evenings.
Be cool when he/she has to cancel dinner or weekend plans.
Be flexible with your time and understand that if he/she has to cancel at the last time, the decision may not be his/her own.
Ask about your attorney date’s goals.
He/she may want to make partner relatively quickly, which means that more hours in the office or in court may be required.
Have a flexible approach to dating.
You may have arranged for a romantic dinner for two at a restaurant that took months to obtain a reservation, but then he/she has to work.
Instead of sulking or ditching him/her, create a picnic dinner and show up at the office instead.
While not all attorneys thrive on full-blown debate opportunities with everyone, chances are if you are dating a lawyer, he/she will enjoy engaging in lively conversation on a variety of topics.
Avoid being intimidated by his/her law degree if you are in a debate.
Just because your date went to law school does not put him/her in a position of power over you.
Be confident in your own knowledge and intelligence and be comfortable to discuss a wide range of topics.
Learn when to agree to disagree.
There’s no point getting into a spat over a difference of opinion.
While perhaps your attorney mate may be used to a fiery conversation with colleagues and then go back to business as usual, let him/her know that once things get a little too heated you’d rather just agree to disagree (rather than get into a knock down, drag out fight).
Identify topics that are off limits.
Perhaps its politics or religion, but find those hot button topics that make your blood boil (and where you differ in opinion) and agree to leave those topics off the table. , An attorney is going to be happier dating someone who is just was passionate about his/her career so instead of waiting for the phone to ring, dig deep into your job or passion.
Adopt the “work hard, play hard” mantra.
If you put in a 12-hour day you may not feel like hitting the clubs after work.
However, commit to a fun activity once the weekend hits such as a pub-crawl, venturing into the city or even getting out of town.
Make him/her wait for you sometimes too.
Your attorney boyfriend/girlfriend doesn’t dump work the minute you snap your fingers so don’t be expected to do the same every time he/she has a free minute.
Decide whether you will discuss work while on dates or leave it behind.
Some couples do better if work is kept out of the relationship, whereas others thrive on discussing what they did during their professional day. , If you prefer to date someone who can be at your beck and call at a moment’s notice you may be better off dating someone from another profession.
Many non-attorney spouses spend a considerable amount of time on their own.
Whether he/she is in trial or traveling, getting serious with an attorney may mean that you won’t have as much time together as you would with someone from another discipline.
Look beyond the money.
While many attorneys make a sizable income, it comes at a price.
Decide what is most important to you--can you live comfortably, but with limited time with your partner or is money not enough?
About the Author
Barbara Henderson
A passionate writer with expertise in home improvement topics. Loves sharing practical knowledge.
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