How to Get to Know Your Boyfriend Better

Pick a calm, quiet moment., Ask about his childhood., Talk about work or school., Ask about his favorite books, movies, and music., Be a good listener., Talk about yourself, too., Respect silence.

10 Steps 3 min read Medium

Step-by-Step Guide

  1. Step 1: Pick a calm

    In order to truly focus on getting to know your boyfriend better, pick the right setting to have a deep conversation.

    Avoid a noisy bar or restaurant or talking at a time when one of you will be busy.

    Instead, choose to have a nice talk while on a walk through the park, during a picnic, or while sitting out on the porch looking at the stars.
  2. Step 2: quiet moment.

    To get to know your boyfriend fully, first find out how his earliest years were.

    Ask him where he grew up, about his siblings, his relationships with his parents, and his friends when he was a kid.

    Ask him his favorite memory and his worst memory from his childhood.

    This will help you get a general feel for the major events that occurred while he was growing up., Ask your beau questions about the schools he’s been to, his experiences there, and his current job.

    Find out if he enjoys his job or if he wants to change careers or go back to school.Ask him what his ideal job or college would look like.

    You might say something like “So, tell me about your job now.

    What do you like best about it? And what do you wish you could change?” , You can also really get to know a person by finding out what kind of entertainment they enjoy.

    You might even find out that you have more in common than you thought.

    Find out what books he enjoyed most or could read over and over.

    See if any films have made him cry.

    Find out what concerts he’s been to or ones he’d like to go to.You can try saying “When I was a kid, I remember reading To Kill a Mockingbird and it really changed my life.

    Do you have any books that affected you like that?” , During this process, be sure that you are fully engaged in the conversation.

    You cannot get to know someone if you are not paying attention to them.

    Put your phone down and truly listen.

    Laugh with him, cry with him, kiss him, and nod to show that you are paying attention.Respect his privacy if he doesn’t want to talk about certain topics. , In getting to know him, be sure that he is getting to know you, too.

    As he finishes sharing stories or information about himself, share some things about you, as well.

    This will help the two of you grow closer.For instance, in talking about his childhood, you can also talk about your own.

    If he recalls a time he got in a fight with his sister, you can say “Yea, I used to fight with my brother all the time, too! Mom and Dad were always grounding us for our arguments.” , You can get to know someone even when you are not speaking.

    Notice how often you are silent with your boyfriend and if that silence is comfortable.

    This is a sign of true closeness.

    Allow for moments of silence when you don’t have anything to say and simply enjoy the peace in the room.
  3. Step 3: Ask about his childhood.

  4. Step 4: Talk about work or school.

  5. Step 5: Ask about his favorite books

  6. Step 6: movies

  7. Step 7: and music.

  8. Step 8: Be a good listener.

  9. Step 9: Talk about yourself

  10. Step 10: Respect silence.

Detailed Guide

In order to truly focus on getting to know your boyfriend better, pick the right setting to have a deep conversation.

Avoid a noisy bar or restaurant or talking at a time when one of you will be busy.

Instead, choose to have a nice talk while on a walk through the park, during a picnic, or while sitting out on the porch looking at the stars.

To get to know your boyfriend fully, first find out how his earliest years were.

Ask him where he grew up, about his siblings, his relationships with his parents, and his friends when he was a kid.

Ask him his favorite memory and his worst memory from his childhood.

This will help you get a general feel for the major events that occurred while he was growing up., Ask your beau questions about the schools he’s been to, his experiences there, and his current job.

Find out if he enjoys his job or if he wants to change careers or go back to school.Ask him what his ideal job or college would look like.

You might say something like “So, tell me about your job now.

What do you like best about it? And what do you wish you could change?” , You can also really get to know a person by finding out what kind of entertainment they enjoy.

You might even find out that you have more in common than you thought.

Find out what books he enjoyed most or could read over and over.

See if any films have made him cry.

Find out what concerts he’s been to or ones he’d like to go to.You can try saying “When I was a kid, I remember reading To Kill a Mockingbird and it really changed my life.

Do you have any books that affected you like that?” , During this process, be sure that you are fully engaged in the conversation.

You cannot get to know someone if you are not paying attention to them.

Put your phone down and truly listen.

Laugh with him, cry with him, kiss him, and nod to show that you are paying attention.Respect his privacy if he doesn’t want to talk about certain topics. , In getting to know him, be sure that he is getting to know you, too.

As he finishes sharing stories or information about himself, share some things about you, as well.

This will help the two of you grow closer.For instance, in talking about his childhood, you can also talk about your own.

If he recalls a time he got in a fight with his sister, you can say “Yea, I used to fight with my brother all the time, too! Mom and Dad were always grounding us for our arguments.” , You can get to know someone even when you are not speaking.

Notice how often you are silent with your boyfriend and if that silence is comfortable.

This is a sign of true closeness.

Allow for moments of silence when you don’t have anything to say and simply enjoy the peace in the room.

About the Author

H

Hannah Howard

Experienced content creator specializing in DIY projects guides and tutorials.

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