How to Make Your Relationship Survive While Working Opposite Shifts
Don't waste the time you get., Borrow from each other's time., Make appointments with each other if important or serious topics need to be discussed., Don't compete with each other.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Don't waste the time you get.
The last thing you want to do is spend the limited time you get together complaining about how little time you get together.
Treat your time together as precious opportunities not to be wasted.That said, spending a lazy afternoon (or mid-morning, or late night) doing nothing together is not necessarily wasting time.
If you're spending enjoyable time together, it is time well spent.
Sharing a meal together whenever possible offers one ideal way to communicate and spend quality time with one another.
For example, if you work the graveyard shift and arrive home at 8 a.m., eat "dinner" with your partner as he/she eats breakfast before work. -
Step 2: Borrow from each other's time.
When you work opposite shifts, each of you will end up with a lot of solo time, which can in fact have some benefits.
Be fair in offering up some of this "you" time when it can be transformed into "both of you" time.
As is the case in so many ways in a relationship, an equitable give-and-take is essential.Occasionally offer up some of your sleep time to share with your partner, and expect the same of him/her.
Don't sacrifice too much sleep, however, or you will be more cranky with your partner and less productive at work.
Work with your partner to save up vacation days so you can spend them together.
Although you may work opposite shifts, you and your partner can schedule time off work or vacation on the same days, so that you can maximize the amount of quality time you spend together. , It may seem a bit much to have to pencil in times to talk to your significant other, but important discussions require both partners to be mentally alert and emotionally available.For example, if you bring up important topics when your partner arrives home tired from work, he/she may lack the energy and mental clarity to fully engage in a serious discussion.
Instead, set aside a time that allows each of you to mentally and emotionally prepare for an important conversation, be it about money, family, or another topic.
Actually, setting appointments can work for less serious matters as well.
It can help you "block out" specific periods of time for the both of you to spend some enjoyable time together. , When you work opposite shifts, it can sometimes seem like all your partner does is sleep, because that is what he or she is doing during your brief overlap times.
You'll come home, see the sink full of dishes or the living room in disarray, and feel like you're the one doing all the heavy lifting in the relationship.
If home chores actually are inequitable, try to remedy that; if not, try to understand how hard your significant other is working while you sleep.Divide household chores equally between you and your partner.
Be realistic about each of your individual skill sets and the times of day (or night) you have to complete the chores, though.
You may even want to post a chore sheet so that each of you can confirm that the other is indeed working just as hard as you to keep the household functioning.
Consider hiring help to complete certain chores during acceptable hours if your partner lacks the skills to complete those chores.
For example, if your partner has time off during the day, but lacks the skills to mow the lawn, hire a gardener or lawn care specialist to mow the lawn during daylight hours.
You don't need your neighbors calling the cops on you because you're trying to mow by flashlight after midnight. -
Step 3: Make appointments with each other if important or serious topics need to be discussed.
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Step 4: Don't compete with each other.
Detailed Guide
The last thing you want to do is spend the limited time you get together complaining about how little time you get together.
Treat your time together as precious opportunities not to be wasted.That said, spending a lazy afternoon (or mid-morning, or late night) doing nothing together is not necessarily wasting time.
If you're spending enjoyable time together, it is time well spent.
Sharing a meal together whenever possible offers one ideal way to communicate and spend quality time with one another.
For example, if you work the graveyard shift and arrive home at 8 a.m., eat "dinner" with your partner as he/she eats breakfast before work.
When you work opposite shifts, each of you will end up with a lot of solo time, which can in fact have some benefits.
Be fair in offering up some of this "you" time when it can be transformed into "both of you" time.
As is the case in so many ways in a relationship, an equitable give-and-take is essential.Occasionally offer up some of your sleep time to share with your partner, and expect the same of him/her.
Don't sacrifice too much sleep, however, or you will be more cranky with your partner and less productive at work.
Work with your partner to save up vacation days so you can spend them together.
Although you may work opposite shifts, you and your partner can schedule time off work or vacation on the same days, so that you can maximize the amount of quality time you spend together. , It may seem a bit much to have to pencil in times to talk to your significant other, but important discussions require both partners to be mentally alert and emotionally available.For example, if you bring up important topics when your partner arrives home tired from work, he/she may lack the energy and mental clarity to fully engage in a serious discussion.
Instead, set aside a time that allows each of you to mentally and emotionally prepare for an important conversation, be it about money, family, or another topic.
Actually, setting appointments can work for less serious matters as well.
It can help you "block out" specific periods of time for the both of you to spend some enjoyable time together. , When you work opposite shifts, it can sometimes seem like all your partner does is sleep, because that is what he or she is doing during your brief overlap times.
You'll come home, see the sink full of dishes or the living room in disarray, and feel like you're the one doing all the heavy lifting in the relationship.
If home chores actually are inequitable, try to remedy that; if not, try to understand how hard your significant other is working while you sleep.Divide household chores equally between you and your partner.
Be realistic about each of your individual skill sets and the times of day (or night) you have to complete the chores, though.
You may even want to post a chore sheet so that each of you can confirm that the other is indeed working just as hard as you to keep the household functioning.
Consider hiring help to complete certain chores during acceptable hours if your partner lacks the skills to complete those chores.
For example, if your partner has time off during the day, but lacks the skills to mow the lawn, hire a gardener or lawn care specialist to mow the lawn during daylight hours.
You don't need your neighbors calling the cops on you because you're trying to mow by flashlight after midnight.
About the Author
Amanda Wilson
A passionate writer with expertise in DIY projects topics. Loves sharing practical knowledge.
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