How to Stop Bad Examples from Hurting Your Relationship
Be careful where you get your relationship advice and role models., Have realistic expectations., Learn to evaluate relationship advice., Find a positive role model., Go to therapy for unresolved childhood issues.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Be careful where you get your relationship advice and role models.
You can get advice about your relationship anywhere – from your friends, family, and even so-called “experts” – but take it with a grain of salt.
Likewise, be aware that bad relationships are all too common, and it’s probably not a good idea to try to model your relationship on anyone else’s.Every relationship is different because of the individuals in it.
Advice that works for one couple may not work for another.
Some relationships that look fine on the surface may have problems underneath.
Don’t assume somebody has a perfect relationship, even if they try to present it that way. -
Step 2: Have realistic expectations.
Don’t expect your partner to act like your best friend’s significant other or the love interest in a movie you just saw.
Instead, accept your partner as the unique, imperfect person they are.
Understand that your partner won’t do everything right or always know what you want, just like you won’t always live up to their wishes., Become a more cautious receiver of advice when it comes to your relationship.
Generally, you'll want to shy away from advice that is unsolicited.
You also want to avoid listening to those who seem to have ulterior motives.
Take advice from people who are relatively impartial and not trying to steer you one way or another.
For instance, a friend who just went through a nasty breakup tells you "All men are cheaters.
It's best if you get out now before you're hurt." This advice is guided by your friend's own emotional experience and is, therefore, biased.
Great sources for advice might be an older mentor, spiritual advisor or a relationship counselor., If you'd like to look to another couple for guidance in your relationship, choose carefully.
Find people who share similar relationship values as you and your partner.
Also, look for people who can testify to trials and triumphs in their relationship versus a couple who pretends to be perfect.Even if you choose a couple with a more realistic portrayal of their relationship, you must keep in mind that these people are only human.
Never take all your advice from them, as they have faults just as you do. , If you or your partner are children of divorce or abuse/neglect, you may need to see a therapist.
If you were not raised by healthy relationship role models you might repeatedly get into bad relationships or sabotage your current one.See a counselor either individually or a couple to work through unresolved issues from your childhood that may impact your relationships now. -
Step 3: Learn to evaluate relationship advice.
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Step 4: Find a positive role model.
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Step 5: Go to therapy for unresolved childhood issues.
Detailed Guide
You can get advice about your relationship anywhere – from your friends, family, and even so-called “experts” – but take it with a grain of salt.
Likewise, be aware that bad relationships are all too common, and it’s probably not a good idea to try to model your relationship on anyone else’s.Every relationship is different because of the individuals in it.
Advice that works for one couple may not work for another.
Some relationships that look fine on the surface may have problems underneath.
Don’t assume somebody has a perfect relationship, even if they try to present it that way.
Don’t expect your partner to act like your best friend’s significant other or the love interest in a movie you just saw.
Instead, accept your partner as the unique, imperfect person they are.
Understand that your partner won’t do everything right or always know what you want, just like you won’t always live up to their wishes., Become a more cautious receiver of advice when it comes to your relationship.
Generally, you'll want to shy away from advice that is unsolicited.
You also want to avoid listening to those who seem to have ulterior motives.
Take advice from people who are relatively impartial and not trying to steer you one way or another.
For instance, a friend who just went through a nasty breakup tells you "All men are cheaters.
It's best if you get out now before you're hurt." This advice is guided by your friend's own emotional experience and is, therefore, biased.
Great sources for advice might be an older mentor, spiritual advisor or a relationship counselor., If you'd like to look to another couple for guidance in your relationship, choose carefully.
Find people who share similar relationship values as you and your partner.
Also, look for people who can testify to trials and triumphs in their relationship versus a couple who pretends to be perfect.Even if you choose a couple with a more realistic portrayal of their relationship, you must keep in mind that these people are only human.
Never take all your advice from them, as they have faults just as you do. , If you or your partner are children of divorce or abuse/neglect, you may need to see a therapist.
If you were not raised by healthy relationship role models you might repeatedly get into bad relationships or sabotage your current one.See a counselor either individually or a couple to work through unresolved issues from your childhood that may impact your relationships now.
About the Author
Helen Anderson
Helen Anderson is an experienced writer with over 12 years of expertise in lifestyle and practical guides. Passionate about sharing practical knowledge, Helen creates easy-to-follow guides that help readers achieve their goals.
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