How to Be Good at Conversations
Spend time around groups of good talkers., Take note of whether the conversation is from a first, second or third person perspective.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Spend time around groups of good talkers.
This way you can figure out good conversation moves naturally.
It lets you sponge up the ability easily with little effort.
If good talkers are hard to find, it means the people in your zone need your help. -
Step 2: Take note of whether the conversation is from a first
Conversations often flow from one perspective to another
- you may be discussing a political situation (third) and then give your opinion (first) and then ask what somebody else thinks (second), but keeping an ear on the predominant perspective is a good way to maintain the flow.
If everyone is focused on discussing somebody's relationship dramas and you keep bringing the conversation around to your own, people may get annoyed, unless it contributes something to overall point of the discussion.
Is the group sharing personal stories that relate to the topic? For example when discussing food, people may recount travel stories about interesting places they've eaten
- sharing personal stories is usually a first person ("I") perspective.
Are you all discussing a particular situation that someone in the group is going through? For example you are helping a friend out with a relationship problem.
This is often done in second person ("you")
- though the person you are discussing will be speaking in first ("I").
Are you discussing concepts, politics, culture or other topics not directly relating to the people in the group? For example you are talking about a new album that has been released, or something you saw in the news.
This often takes the form of third person ("they"). -
Step 3: second or third person perspective.
Detailed Guide
This way you can figure out good conversation moves naturally.
It lets you sponge up the ability easily with little effort.
If good talkers are hard to find, it means the people in your zone need your help.
Conversations often flow from one perspective to another
- you may be discussing a political situation (third) and then give your opinion (first) and then ask what somebody else thinks (second), but keeping an ear on the predominant perspective is a good way to maintain the flow.
If everyone is focused on discussing somebody's relationship dramas and you keep bringing the conversation around to your own, people may get annoyed, unless it contributes something to overall point of the discussion.
Is the group sharing personal stories that relate to the topic? For example when discussing food, people may recount travel stories about interesting places they've eaten
- sharing personal stories is usually a first person ("I") perspective.
Are you all discussing a particular situation that someone in the group is going through? For example you are helping a friend out with a relationship problem.
This is often done in second person ("you")
- though the person you are discussing will be speaking in first ("I").
Are you discussing concepts, politics, culture or other topics not directly relating to the people in the group? For example you are talking about a new album that has been released, or something you saw in the news.
This often takes the form of third person ("they").
About the Author
Carolyn Graham
Professional writer focused on creating easy-to-follow pet care tutorials.
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