How to Comfort a Grieving Friend
Let your friend know that you're there for them without conditions or expectations., Give your friend space., Avoid telling your friend how to behave during grief., Be a source of cheer and helpfulness., Avoid bringing your own problems to your...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Let your friend know that you're there for them without conditions or expectations.
This is a difficult time for your friend and they need a lot of understanding.
Avoid pressuring your friend to talk or discuss their feelings.
It is far better to let your friend know that you are available if needed than to force them to talk to you about what has happened.
Don't pressure your friend or keep on asking how they feel.
It's self-evident that they don't feel great. -
Step 2: Give your friend space.
A quiet, non-talkative and tearful friend is still your friend but one likely to need his or her own space and time to process the emotions. , Being told that there is a right and wrong way to feel through actions, statements and generalizations can be painful during the first stages of grieving, so try to keep your thoughts about grief to yourself and simply affirm that their feelings are valued, real and respected. , This doesn't mean telling them they'll get over it soon! It means doing things more than saying things, bustling about in the background and being helpful by doing the things that need to be done.
Things that you can help with include:
Bringing over meals, tidying the house a little, doing some shopping for your friend, etc.
Helping with funeral arrangements or contact people and companies to tidy up loose ends.
Babysitting or pet-sitting to give your friend a break now and then.
Taking your friend out for a day, away from all of the reminders. , This isn't a good time to be loading off your problems onto your friend.
He or she is in a fragile place right now and cannot be the usual sounding board you may have come to rely upon.
Seek the help of another friend for this purpose, until your grieving friend feels whole again. , Sometimes your friend will push you away.
Go away without taking it personally.
Realize that it is the grief talking and the grief acting out.
Your friend may feel too overwhelmed to cope with the acts of friendship for the moment.
Agree to back off for a bit but let your friend know it's temporary, and that the moment they need you again, just to call. -
Step 3: Avoid telling your friend how to behave during grief.
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Step 4: Be a source of cheer and helpfulness.
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Step 5: Avoid bringing your own problems to your friend.
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Step 6: Know when to step away.
Detailed Guide
This is a difficult time for your friend and they need a lot of understanding.
Avoid pressuring your friend to talk or discuss their feelings.
It is far better to let your friend know that you are available if needed than to force them to talk to you about what has happened.
Don't pressure your friend or keep on asking how they feel.
It's self-evident that they don't feel great.
A quiet, non-talkative and tearful friend is still your friend but one likely to need his or her own space and time to process the emotions. , Being told that there is a right and wrong way to feel through actions, statements and generalizations can be painful during the first stages of grieving, so try to keep your thoughts about grief to yourself and simply affirm that their feelings are valued, real and respected. , This doesn't mean telling them they'll get over it soon! It means doing things more than saying things, bustling about in the background and being helpful by doing the things that need to be done.
Things that you can help with include:
Bringing over meals, tidying the house a little, doing some shopping for your friend, etc.
Helping with funeral arrangements or contact people and companies to tidy up loose ends.
Babysitting or pet-sitting to give your friend a break now and then.
Taking your friend out for a day, away from all of the reminders. , This isn't a good time to be loading off your problems onto your friend.
He or she is in a fragile place right now and cannot be the usual sounding board you may have come to rely upon.
Seek the help of another friend for this purpose, until your grieving friend feels whole again. , Sometimes your friend will push you away.
Go away without taking it personally.
Realize that it is the grief talking and the grief acting out.
Your friend may feel too overwhelmed to cope with the acts of friendship for the moment.
Agree to back off for a bit but let your friend know it's temporary, and that the moment they need you again, just to call.
About the Author
Ann Myers
Ann Myers has dedicated 3 years to mastering education and learning. As a content creator, Ann focuses on providing actionable tips and step-by-step guides.
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