How to Compliment a Woman's Personality
Don’t give one too soon., Avoid singling her out in groups., Highlight what makes her unique., Make sure your comment is relevant., Note why this trait is important to you., Keep it short and sweet., Ensure your language is clear., Don’t expect a...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Don’t give one too soon.
Unless you are responding to an online dating profile or mutual friends set you up on a date, have at least one pleasant, personal conversation with her before you try to compliment her character traits.Give her a chance to tell you about herself before indicating you know her in a personal way, even if your mutual friend has spoken profusely about her great qualities.
Say "Roger told me you are really into volunteering," for example, instead of "You are a really generous person!" If she is already a good friend of yours, and you suddenly start wanting a relationship, be especially careful about starting off too strong too quickly. -
Step 2: Avoid singling her out in groups.
You have mutual friends, and are hanging out with the woman you like.
Giving her compliments in front of others might make her feel put on the spot.
Save it for when you two are speaking privately. , Even comments about one’s personality can seem insincere if they are too common or obvious.
Point out to her something that makes her an individual who you want to get to know better.
Never use a cliché or obvious pick-up line. “I’ve never met anyone like you before,” or “You are a real keeper” are not compliments.
If you can’t think of a compliment that doesn’t sound rehearsed or looked up online, opt not to give one at all.Be specific when complimenting her sense of humor.
What exactly about it is so awesome--her snarkiness, her ability to make puns hilarious when no one else can, or that it’s so similar to you own? , It should flow with the conversation or be related to what you are doing at that moment.
Bringing up something wonderful about her character out of the blue will likely either make her uncomfortable by indicating your romantic feelings, or sound insincere.
Wait to tell her how much you admire her intelligence until you are having a philosophical discussion or watching a political debate, etc., not during a game of Ultimate Frisbee., She can have lots of good qualities that a lot of people won’t care about.
Make sure she knows you are sincere by briefly stating why you care that she volunteers at the homeless shelter or goes regularly to the Buddhist meditation group nearby.#* If you don’t make a connection to her great quality or characteristic, then you are just giving false flattery., A well-received compliment is succinct.
You need two sentences at most—one to tell her what you admire about her and a second to qualify why this trait matters to you as a person.Don’t give a whole treatise on how smart she is.
She probably knows she’s smart and doesn’t need you to convince her.
Keep your compliments down to earth.
Don’t “put her on a pedestal.”Even if you think she’s the most amazingly intelligent woman you’ve ever met, avoid such generalizations.
Think about how a celebrity might feel when a starstruck fan standing behind them in a long line at Starbucks starts delivering a ten minute speech about how amazing they are.
Don’t overdo it.
If you are constantly giving this woman praise, it will start to come off as insincere or forced.
Also, when you give out compliments all the time, they mean less.
She might come to expect them and be hurt when you stop trying so hard., Sometimes what we mean to say doesn’t come out the way we meant it.
A lot of words have double meanings or multiple uses that make them ambiguous.
Make sure you are clearly stating what you mean so that she can’t take it the wrong way.”I love your rare .” Is it rare in the general population, rarely a quality attributed to women, or rare as far as her typical behavior? Instead, say “I think its wonderful that you are so because you inspire everyone around you to be that too." Also make sure you aren’t accidentally giving a back-handed compliment. “Wow, you are really funny today,” feels like “You aren’t usually funny at all.
What a surprise!” , Give her a compliment because you admire her and want her to know, not so she will go out with you or think you’re good dating material.Avoid “nice guy syndrome.” Don’t be nice to a girl and expect her to reward you by going out with you.
You should be nice because she’s a person, like you, and deserves respect. -
Step 3: Highlight what makes her unique.
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Step 4: Make sure your comment is relevant.
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Step 5: Note why this trait is important to you.
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Step 6: Keep it short and sweet.
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Step 7: Ensure your language is clear.
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Step 8: Don’t expect a response or gift-in-kind.
Detailed Guide
Unless you are responding to an online dating profile or mutual friends set you up on a date, have at least one pleasant, personal conversation with her before you try to compliment her character traits.Give her a chance to tell you about herself before indicating you know her in a personal way, even if your mutual friend has spoken profusely about her great qualities.
Say "Roger told me you are really into volunteering," for example, instead of "You are a really generous person!" If she is already a good friend of yours, and you suddenly start wanting a relationship, be especially careful about starting off too strong too quickly.
You have mutual friends, and are hanging out with the woman you like.
Giving her compliments in front of others might make her feel put on the spot.
Save it for when you two are speaking privately. , Even comments about one’s personality can seem insincere if they are too common or obvious.
Point out to her something that makes her an individual who you want to get to know better.
Never use a cliché or obvious pick-up line. “I’ve never met anyone like you before,” or “You are a real keeper” are not compliments.
If you can’t think of a compliment that doesn’t sound rehearsed or looked up online, opt not to give one at all.Be specific when complimenting her sense of humor.
What exactly about it is so awesome--her snarkiness, her ability to make puns hilarious when no one else can, or that it’s so similar to you own? , It should flow with the conversation or be related to what you are doing at that moment.
Bringing up something wonderful about her character out of the blue will likely either make her uncomfortable by indicating your romantic feelings, or sound insincere.
Wait to tell her how much you admire her intelligence until you are having a philosophical discussion or watching a political debate, etc., not during a game of Ultimate Frisbee., She can have lots of good qualities that a lot of people won’t care about.
Make sure she knows you are sincere by briefly stating why you care that she volunteers at the homeless shelter or goes regularly to the Buddhist meditation group nearby.#* If you don’t make a connection to her great quality or characteristic, then you are just giving false flattery., A well-received compliment is succinct.
You need two sentences at most—one to tell her what you admire about her and a second to qualify why this trait matters to you as a person.Don’t give a whole treatise on how smart she is.
She probably knows she’s smart and doesn’t need you to convince her.
Keep your compliments down to earth.
Don’t “put her on a pedestal.”Even if you think she’s the most amazingly intelligent woman you’ve ever met, avoid such generalizations.
Think about how a celebrity might feel when a starstruck fan standing behind them in a long line at Starbucks starts delivering a ten minute speech about how amazing they are.
Don’t overdo it.
If you are constantly giving this woman praise, it will start to come off as insincere or forced.
Also, when you give out compliments all the time, they mean less.
She might come to expect them and be hurt when you stop trying so hard., Sometimes what we mean to say doesn’t come out the way we meant it.
A lot of words have double meanings or multiple uses that make them ambiguous.
Make sure you are clearly stating what you mean so that she can’t take it the wrong way.”I love your rare .” Is it rare in the general population, rarely a quality attributed to women, or rare as far as her typical behavior? Instead, say “I think its wonderful that you are so because you inspire everyone around you to be that too." Also make sure you aren’t accidentally giving a back-handed compliment. “Wow, you are really funny today,” feels like “You aren’t usually funny at all.
What a surprise!” , Give her a compliment because you admire her and want her to know, not so she will go out with you or think you’re good dating material.Avoid “nice guy syndrome.” Don’t be nice to a girl and expect her to reward you by going out with you.
You should be nice because she’s a person, like you, and deserves respect.
About the Author
Brian Gordon
Professional writer focused on creating easy-to-follow pet care tutorials.
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