How to Deal With Friends With Different Political Views
Practice “hungry listening.” A good friend has sincere interest in finding out as much as she can about her friends’ point of view., Be wary of “blocked listening.” Political beliefs are sensitive, personal issues, and it can be easy to get...
Step-by-Step Guide
-
Step 1: Practice “hungry listening.” A good friend has sincere interest in finding out as much as she can about her friends’ point of view.
If you’re really sincere about staying involved in this friendship, stay interested in your friends’ daily life and experiences.
Let your questions reflect this deep interest, and don’t get caught up discussions of political likes and dislikes.Explore your friends’ perspective by asking open-ended questions.
Think out loud about what your friend shares, and ask questions to clarify that you’ve understood what she said. -
Step 2: Be wary of “blocked listening.” Political beliefs are sensitive
When people have political discussions, they’re likely to engage in “blocked listening” which means selectively listening to your friend’s words for an opportunity to disagree with what’s been said.If you find yourself wanting to include the word “but” in your conversation, chances are you’re engaged in blocked listening.
Remember that telling people where they’re wrong is unlikely to change their minds or improve your relationship. , Because political beliefs are based on interpretation of facts, you won’t be able to convince another person of your point of view by quoting well-respected experts who agree with you.
This only invites your friend to bring in expert opinions that support her own point of view.Quoting experts, or providing poll figures to show how many people agree with you on a political topic, isn’t likely to persuade your friend that she’s wrong and you’re right.
If this is an issue that’s important to your values, it’s enough to just let her know what your own beliefs are.
If she wants to learn more, allow her to ask you. , It’s not fun to talk to someone whose beliefs are fixed.
Political conversations between friends aren’t really about who is right and who is wrong.
Instead, they’re an opportunity to keep a good, thoughtful mood going.It will help to realize that political viewpoints are deeply connected to a person’s sense of identity.
If you get so focussed on “winning” the conversation, no one will have a good time.
Instead of trying to change your friend’s mind about a political topic, find ways to relax and enjoy the discussion. , You wouldn’t want to find your own social media feed full of opinions you disagree with, so be careful not to do this to others.
It’s okay to include occasional political opinions, but you don’t need to post your opinions day after day.In particular, avoid putting in opinions that put down political perspectives that are mean-spirited or which put down opposing views.
If your friend posts extensively on political perspectives that you disagree with, it’s okay to “hide” her feed.
This way, you can focus more on your real-life friendship. , If you feel yourself getting emotional during a conversation, it might be a good idea to take a break.
Knowing when to walk away from a conversation can save a friendship before you say something that you can’t take back.If your friend tries to end the conversation with you, don’t force her to continue.
When the conversation’s not fun anymore, it’s time to end it.
Remember that no matter what your political differences might be, your personal relationship is more important. -
Step 3: personal issues
-
Step 4: and it can be easy to get emotional about them.
-
Step 5: Don’t try to change your friend’s views.
-
Step 6: Avoid imposing your political beliefs on your friends.
-
Step 7: Be mindful of your social media feed.
-
Step 8: Agree to disagree.
Detailed Guide
If you’re really sincere about staying involved in this friendship, stay interested in your friends’ daily life and experiences.
Let your questions reflect this deep interest, and don’t get caught up discussions of political likes and dislikes.Explore your friends’ perspective by asking open-ended questions.
Think out loud about what your friend shares, and ask questions to clarify that you’ve understood what she said.
When people have political discussions, they’re likely to engage in “blocked listening” which means selectively listening to your friend’s words for an opportunity to disagree with what’s been said.If you find yourself wanting to include the word “but” in your conversation, chances are you’re engaged in blocked listening.
Remember that telling people where they’re wrong is unlikely to change their minds or improve your relationship. , Because political beliefs are based on interpretation of facts, you won’t be able to convince another person of your point of view by quoting well-respected experts who agree with you.
This only invites your friend to bring in expert opinions that support her own point of view.Quoting experts, or providing poll figures to show how many people agree with you on a political topic, isn’t likely to persuade your friend that she’s wrong and you’re right.
If this is an issue that’s important to your values, it’s enough to just let her know what your own beliefs are.
If she wants to learn more, allow her to ask you. , It’s not fun to talk to someone whose beliefs are fixed.
Political conversations between friends aren’t really about who is right and who is wrong.
Instead, they’re an opportunity to keep a good, thoughtful mood going.It will help to realize that political viewpoints are deeply connected to a person’s sense of identity.
If you get so focussed on “winning” the conversation, no one will have a good time.
Instead of trying to change your friend’s mind about a political topic, find ways to relax and enjoy the discussion. , You wouldn’t want to find your own social media feed full of opinions you disagree with, so be careful not to do this to others.
It’s okay to include occasional political opinions, but you don’t need to post your opinions day after day.In particular, avoid putting in opinions that put down political perspectives that are mean-spirited or which put down opposing views.
If your friend posts extensively on political perspectives that you disagree with, it’s okay to “hide” her feed.
This way, you can focus more on your real-life friendship. , If you feel yourself getting emotional during a conversation, it might be a good idea to take a break.
Knowing when to walk away from a conversation can save a friendship before you say something that you can’t take back.If your friend tries to end the conversation with you, don’t force her to continue.
When the conversation’s not fun anymore, it’s time to end it.
Remember that no matter what your political differences might be, your personal relationship is more important.
About the Author
Julie Ford
Committed to making hobbies accessible and understandable for everyone.
Rate This Guide
How helpful was this guide? Click to rate: