How to Make a Friend Stop Swearing
Let them know you are uncomfortable., Set boundaries., Help them make a commitment.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Let them know you are uncomfortable.
Tell your friend that you are uncomfortable every time they use a curse word or a succession of curse words.
Make sure to let your friend know that you do not have a problem with them, but with their excessive cursing.
Preface the conversation with a positive tone by saying something positive first.You can say, “Hey Barbara, you’re a great person and one of my really close friends.
I enjoy hanging out with you because we always have a great time together.
However, I noticed that you are beginning to curse a lot.
It makes me feel very uncomfortable and anxious.
Do you mind refraining from using these words? I can help you.” -
Step 2: Set boundaries.
Perhaps you are uncomfortable with a specific curse word, for example curse words relating to someone’s gender or race.
Let your friend know that you will not tolerate the use of these words around you.
Don’t alienate your friend by avoiding them completely.
However, let them know that you lose any interest in what they are saying once they start using these words.For example, “I don’t mind a curse word here or there, but I feel very uncomfortable when you refer to people and things as ‘fag’ or ‘gay.’ There are better, more descriptive words that you can use to explain your feelings.” , Let your friend know that you are willing to help them make a commitment to stop cursing or using specific curse words.
Help them make a commitment by setting a goal.
Let them know that you will help them achieve this goal as long as they are willing to commit to it.For example, if your friend curses at least five times a day, set a goal to reduce the amount of curse words used to once per day.
Once this goal is achieved, set a new goal of four curse words per week.
Keep going until the use of curse words is eliminated from their vocabulary. -
Step 3: Help them make a commitment.
Detailed Guide
Tell your friend that you are uncomfortable every time they use a curse word or a succession of curse words.
Make sure to let your friend know that you do not have a problem with them, but with their excessive cursing.
Preface the conversation with a positive tone by saying something positive first.You can say, “Hey Barbara, you’re a great person and one of my really close friends.
I enjoy hanging out with you because we always have a great time together.
However, I noticed that you are beginning to curse a lot.
It makes me feel very uncomfortable and anxious.
Do you mind refraining from using these words? I can help you.”
Perhaps you are uncomfortable with a specific curse word, for example curse words relating to someone’s gender or race.
Let your friend know that you will not tolerate the use of these words around you.
Don’t alienate your friend by avoiding them completely.
However, let them know that you lose any interest in what they are saying once they start using these words.For example, “I don’t mind a curse word here or there, but I feel very uncomfortable when you refer to people and things as ‘fag’ or ‘gay.’ There are better, more descriptive words that you can use to explain your feelings.” , Let your friend know that you are willing to help them make a commitment to stop cursing or using specific curse words.
Help them make a commitment by setting a goal.
Let them know that you will help them achieve this goal as long as they are willing to commit to it.For example, if your friend curses at least five times a day, set a goal to reduce the amount of curse words used to once per day.
Once this goal is achieved, set a new goal of four curse words per week.
Keep going until the use of curse words is eliminated from their vocabulary.
About the Author
Gary Freeman
Specializes in breaking down complex DIY projects topics into simple steps.
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