How to Talk to a Story Topper

Step-by-Step Guide

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   Step 1: Know when you're talking to a story topper.

   The story topper in your life might be great fun but generally, they're not the most gracious conversationalists.
   
   Often they're often not even listening to your fascinating story
   - they're just waiting for a gap in the conversation so that they can bring the conversation back to their favourite topic.
   
   Sometimes, they'll get so fed up waiting that they'll simply interrupt you mid-sentence: "-Hey, that happened to me!...".
   
   A story topper at a party is easy to spot.
   
   You'll hear them talking as soon as you walk in the door and when you are leaving at the end of the night, they'll probably still be talking.
   
   Any attempts to steal the conversational floor from this person will be thwarted.
   
   At best they'll listen without interrupting.
   
   At worst, they'll roll their eyes and pointedly ignore your contributions, simply steering the conversation back to whatever they were talking about.
   
   A story topper who knows you well, like a family member or friend, can be harder to deal with.
   
   They know you well and probably already know how to push your buttons.
   
   You already know that no matter what you tell them, they'll go one better.
   
   This isn't uncommon amongst younger siblings, but it can become a lifelong habit.
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   Step 2: Understand why they annoy you A conversation should be an exchange of ideas between people.

   Trying to talk to someone who only wants to talk about themselves and their experiences can be downright unenjoyable.
   
   Often it's not a chat, but an audience that your story-topper is really seeking.
   
   Here's the hard truth
   - sometimes, we dislike story-toppers because they steal the limelight and attention that we wanted for ourselves.
   
   Most of us like the limelight from time to time.
   
   If a story-topper annoys you, be honest
   - are they really being rude, or were you just disappointed that you weren't the centre of the conversation? , If you're having a bad day and need some support and appreciation, perhaps they're simply not the first people you should call.
   
   If you've just received great news, or had a fantastic experience, call up the people you know will be supportive and genuinely excited for you. , If your story topper is a good friend, it's not out of bounds to say: "Hey, it kind of bothered me that you interrupted me then.
   
   Can you let me finish please?"
   
   If your conversation get hi-jacked by a story topper, wait for them to stop talking and simply say "So...as I was saying..." and continue with your story just as if their interruption hadn't happened.
   
   You aren't being rude, or playing their game.
   
   You're simply asserting your right to speak without being interrupted. , If you need the low-down on great restaurants or a job position, they are usually fantastic people to call.
   
   If they claim to have had the best 21st party on the planet, maybe they're the best people to ask for advice about holding yours.
   
   If they think they make the best lasagne on the planet, maybe they do
   - grab the recipe! If they claim to be the best people in the office at fixing computer issues, they're your go-to person when you have an IT drama.
   
   We all have things we're best at
   - letting them shine, especially if it helps you too, is no crime. , No matter how the story topper in your life behaves, decide that you will always be gracious in your dealings and conversations with people.
   
   If someone tells a story about their trip to Paris, don't start thinking about your time in Paris and how much fun it was for you.
   
   Concentrate on them.
   
   Ask them questions and ask them to explain more about what they've said. , Story-toppers aren't evil people, just a little draining sometimes.
   
   Try returning every third phone call, or not replying so soon to that email.
   
   If you need patience to deal with the story topper in your life, you'll need energy.
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   Step 3: Get realistic The best way to deal with a story topper is to be honest about your expectations of them.

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   Step 4: Get honest It's not impossible that your story topper is completely unaware of their behaviour.

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   Step 5: Get strategic Story toppers won't get the attention they sorely crave if you simply ignore them.

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   Step 6: Look for an upside When it comes to advice

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   Step 7: assistance or help

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   Step 8: story-toppers are often invaluable.

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   Step 9: Set an example.

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    Step 10: Get some distance Sometimes

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    Step 11: a story topper becomes so unenjoyable to be around that you might have to get some distance for a while.

Detailed Guide

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