How to Talk With a Person Who Stutters
Understand stuttering., Talk to the stuttering person normally., Listen with attentiveness., Be patient., Speak up if you didn't understand what was said., Speak to a stuttering child in a supportive way., Be encouraging.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Understand stuttering.
Stuttering is a speech or communication disorder.
Speech is disrupted at various points, such as the start, the middle, or at various intervals during the conversation.
It can also be accompanied by facial movements such as trembling lips or jaws, rapid eye blinking, or other facial movements as part of trying to speak.Stuttering has possible developmental, genetic, and neurological causes, although the precise mechanisms behind stuttering are not yet understood.
Some situations can worsen or set off stuttering, such as being in public, speaking in front of people, talking on the telephone, etc. -
Step 2: Talk to the stuttering person normally.
Unless they have a hearing problem, there is no need to raise your voice or slow down your own speech.
Use normal eye contact.
There is no need to stare concertedly (be careful if this is what you're doing when you concentrate!), or to avoid their gaze.
Don't be embarrassed.
If you're not used to talking with somebody who stutters, it might be a surprise the first time.
But the embarrassment for you is short-lived; consider the reality that the stutterer has to endure such reactions regularly.
Realize that your facial expressions will betray your surprise and embarrassment; if you feel this has occurred, simply apologize briefly and ask them to continue talking.
Don't assume a stutterer is shy, nervous, or disabled.
Their mental abilities are still in top form!And don't be super unnaturally nice; just be your usual self around them.
Relax! The more relaxed and undisturbed you come across, the more likely the person stuttering will relax in your presence and feel less anxious. , Focus on the content, not the delivery.
Ensure that your body language reflects your listening interest.
Don't turn to the side, cross your arms, or fidget with fluff on your clothing.
Use active listening techniques, in which the stutterer is actively encouraged to keep talking by your genuine interest and lack of judgment.
It's interesting that some stutterers are able to talk to pets without stuttering;it may well be that the pets' inability to judge underlies this! , If you're used to rushing through conversations, or you're not well versed in listening skills generally, it can be tempting to try to rush a stutterer to finish what he or she is saying.
However, not only is this impolite but it will increase the person who stutters' impression that people are unwilling to listen or simply want to "take the words right out of their mouths".
Don't interrupt or discard what they're trying to say.
Let them finish before having your turn.
Resist the desire to suggest that the stutterer to slow down or relax.
This can increase the anxiety of the situation and is also demeaning.
If you think that being calm and relaxed would help, be so yourself and this will set the tone for the rest of the conversation.Don't try to finish their sentences or fill in words for them.
It can be tempting but it's a sign of impatience and the stutterer knows what he or she wants to say, it just takes longer to get there.
It's also a dangerous assumption to make; while you might think you know where they're headed, you don't necessarily know that, and it could give the impression that all you want to do is rush off. , Feeling shy or uncertain won't improve the communication flow.
Try to press past your feelings of discomfort to explain that you didn't understand something.
Your openness will be appreciated.Be at ease asking about the subject of stuttering.
Provided you raise it politely and with a genuine interest in understanding, most stutterers will be happy to answer your questions about stuttering.It can be a good chance for the stutterer to talk openly about their experience. , Given that the majority of those suffering from stuttering are children, it is important to talk to children with the same care and attentiveness you'd grant a teen or adult, to help them realize that they are loved and cherished.
Don't hurry a child's talking.
Set aside times when you're free to just sit and listen to what your child has to say.
As mentioned earlier, avoid completing your child's thoughts.
Avoid criticizing stuttering, or making it into something negative.
The more supportive the home environment, the more the child will find his or her own space to develop confidence and focus on all aspects of development, not just speech.
If you're concerned about the reaction of other adults to your child's speech, speak to them away from the child.
Let them know that it's important to relax and not to insist that the child "overcome" this impediment.
Be honest with your child about the topic of stuttering.
Discuss the facts and make it known that you love your child the way he or she is. , If you have a friend, sibling, or someone else you care about who stutters, try to be their rock when it comes to speaking publicly.
Help them to feel at ease about speaking in public.
Things you can do include taking them along to public speaking events designed to help stutterers, and even encourage and be there for them when they speak at school or other functions. -
Step 3: Listen with attentiveness.
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Step 4: Be patient.
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Step 5: Speak up if you didn't understand what was said.
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Step 6: Speak to a stuttering child in a supportive way.
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Step 7: Be encouraging.
Detailed Guide
Stuttering is a speech or communication disorder.
Speech is disrupted at various points, such as the start, the middle, or at various intervals during the conversation.
It can also be accompanied by facial movements such as trembling lips or jaws, rapid eye blinking, or other facial movements as part of trying to speak.Stuttering has possible developmental, genetic, and neurological causes, although the precise mechanisms behind stuttering are not yet understood.
Some situations can worsen or set off stuttering, such as being in public, speaking in front of people, talking on the telephone, etc.
Unless they have a hearing problem, there is no need to raise your voice or slow down your own speech.
Use normal eye contact.
There is no need to stare concertedly (be careful if this is what you're doing when you concentrate!), or to avoid their gaze.
Don't be embarrassed.
If you're not used to talking with somebody who stutters, it might be a surprise the first time.
But the embarrassment for you is short-lived; consider the reality that the stutterer has to endure such reactions regularly.
Realize that your facial expressions will betray your surprise and embarrassment; if you feel this has occurred, simply apologize briefly and ask them to continue talking.
Don't assume a stutterer is shy, nervous, or disabled.
Their mental abilities are still in top form!And don't be super unnaturally nice; just be your usual self around them.
Relax! The more relaxed and undisturbed you come across, the more likely the person stuttering will relax in your presence and feel less anxious. , Focus on the content, not the delivery.
Ensure that your body language reflects your listening interest.
Don't turn to the side, cross your arms, or fidget with fluff on your clothing.
Use active listening techniques, in which the stutterer is actively encouraged to keep talking by your genuine interest and lack of judgment.
It's interesting that some stutterers are able to talk to pets without stuttering;it may well be that the pets' inability to judge underlies this! , If you're used to rushing through conversations, or you're not well versed in listening skills generally, it can be tempting to try to rush a stutterer to finish what he or she is saying.
However, not only is this impolite but it will increase the person who stutters' impression that people are unwilling to listen or simply want to "take the words right out of their mouths".
Don't interrupt or discard what they're trying to say.
Let them finish before having your turn.
Resist the desire to suggest that the stutterer to slow down or relax.
This can increase the anxiety of the situation and is also demeaning.
If you think that being calm and relaxed would help, be so yourself and this will set the tone for the rest of the conversation.Don't try to finish their sentences or fill in words for them.
It can be tempting but it's a sign of impatience and the stutterer knows what he or she wants to say, it just takes longer to get there.
It's also a dangerous assumption to make; while you might think you know where they're headed, you don't necessarily know that, and it could give the impression that all you want to do is rush off. , Feeling shy or uncertain won't improve the communication flow.
Try to press past your feelings of discomfort to explain that you didn't understand something.
Your openness will be appreciated.Be at ease asking about the subject of stuttering.
Provided you raise it politely and with a genuine interest in understanding, most stutterers will be happy to answer your questions about stuttering.It can be a good chance for the stutterer to talk openly about their experience. , Given that the majority of those suffering from stuttering are children, it is important to talk to children with the same care and attentiveness you'd grant a teen or adult, to help them realize that they are loved and cherished.
Don't hurry a child's talking.
Set aside times when you're free to just sit and listen to what your child has to say.
As mentioned earlier, avoid completing your child's thoughts.
Avoid criticizing stuttering, or making it into something negative.
The more supportive the home environment, the more the child will find his or her own space to develop confidence and focus on all aspects of development, not just speech.
If you're concerned about the reaction of other adults to your child's speech, speak to them away from the child.
Let them know that it's important to relax and not to insist that the child "overcome" this impediment.
Be honest with your child about the topic of stuttering.
Discuss the facts and make it known that you love your child the way he or she is. , If you have a friend, sibling, or someone else you care about who stutters, try to be their rock when it comes to speaking publicly.
Help them to feel at ease about speaking in public.
Things you can do include taking them along to public speaking events designed to help stutterers, and even encourage and be there for them when they speak at school or other functions.
About the Author
Angela Martinez
Brings years of experience writing about lifestyle and related subjects.
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