How to Write Unmaintainable Code

Step-by-Step Guide

1. 1

   Step 1: Do not use comments.

   Comments exist solely to help developers navigate through their code.
   
   Remove all comments.
   
   If needed, write all comments in a note document or on a sheet of paper so that you are the only one able to view your comments.
2. 2

   Step 2: Use variables as little as possible.

   Never use constants.
   
   Numbers should be valued directly in code.
   
   This will make your code very hard to modify and follow. , If you have to use a variable, no one will be able to figure out what the variable actually exists for without digging into the code if it has a very non-descriptive name.
   
   Try names such as single letters of the alphabet, or, if you are feeling particularly silly, completely unrelated nouns (such as "dog" or "cat"). , A good way to do this is to use methods where they are unnecessary.
   
   Try to use the most complex features that the language has to offer.
   
   For example, C offers a goto command which can be used to jump around code in a very confusing manner. , Create classes, methods, and files that have nothing to do with the overall function of your code. , Do not indent your code.
3. 3

   Step 3: Use obscure variable and method names.

4. 4

   Step 4: Use overly complicated solutions for simple tasks.

5. 5

   Step 5: Write useless code.

6. 6

   Step 6: Ignore indentation.

Detailed Guide

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