How to Quit Pretending to Be Happy All the Time

Become aware that you are pretending., Figure out why you pretend., Realize you don’t have to be perfect., Understand that people go through unhappy periods.

4 Steps 3 min read Medium

Step-by-Step Guide

  1. Step 1: Become aware that you are pretending.

    Often you cannot face that you are not truly happy until you become self-aware.

    You may not realize you are pretending you are happy.

    To figure out if you are happy or just pretending, pay attention to yourself, your actions, and your thoughts.As you go through your days, find out how many times you actually feel happy.

    Be honest with yourself.

    If you don’t feel happy, admit that.

    It may take you awhile to learn how to be observant of your behavior.

    That is okay.

    The more you pay attention to your feelings, and the more you are honest with yourself, the easier it will become.
  2. Step 2: Figure out why you pretend.

    As you work to stop pretending, you should figure out why you pretend to be happy.

    Is it so you won’t show weakness? Is it because you want others to see you as happy and successful? Are you trying to protect your family? Determining the reason you pretend can help you address any underlying problems and get to the real root of what’s causing your discontent.Analyze your actions.

    Who do you pretend to be happy around? How do you act? After you realize these things, analyze why you want to pretend to be happy in these situations.

    For example, you may pretend to be happy around your spouse and children because you don't want to disappoint them or worry them.

    You may smile, laugh, and hide things that upset you to protect them because you care about them. , Many people think they have to be perfect and happy all the time.

    You don’t.

    No one is happy every day, and no one has a perfect life.

    Pretending to be happy to please others or hide your true feelings is a disservice to you.You should focus on being more authentic with your feelings.

    You don’t want to mope all the time, but you don’t have to pretend to be something you aren’t.

    You may discover that the less time you spend pretending, the happier you will be.

    Remember that you will not hurt or disappoint your family or friends if you stop pretending you are happy.

    You are not protecting them by faking it; you are only hurting yourself.

    They will not stop caring about you if you are honest about how you feel. , It is okay if you are unhappy.

    Everyone goes through times in their lives where they are not happy.

    This may be due to a change in circumstances, emotional upheaval, or something else.

    Accept that it’s okay to be unhappy at certain times.Some unhappy periods may last for weeks or months.

    However, if you are unhappy for longer than this, it may mean that you have a more serious problem.
  3. Step 3: Realize you don’t have to be perfect.

  4. Step 4: Understand that people go through unhappy periods.

Detailed Guide

Often you cannot face that you are not truly happy until you become self-aware.

You may not realize you are pretending you are happy.

To figure out if you are happy or just pretending, pay attention to yourself, your actions, and your thoughts.As you go through your days, find out how many times you actually feel happy.

Be honest with yourself.

If you don’t feel happy, admit that.

It may take you awhile to learn how to be observant of your behavior.

That is okay.

The more you pay attention to your feelings, and the more you are honest with yourself, the easier it will become.

As you work to stop pretending, you should figure out why you pretend to be happy.

Is it so you won’t show weakness? Is it because you want others to see you as happy and successful? Are you trying to protect your family? Determining the reason you pretend can help you address any underlying problems and get to the real root of what’s causing your discontent.Analyze your actions.

Who do you pretend to be happy around? How do you act? After you realize these things, analyze why you want to pretend to be happy in these situations.

For example, you may pretend to be happy around your spouse and children because you don't want to disappoint them or worry them.

You may smile, laugh, and hide things that upset you to protect them because you care about them. , Many people think they have to be perfect and happy all the time.

You don’t.

No one is happy every day, and no one has a perfect life.

Pretending to be happy to please others or hide your true feelings is a disservice to you.You should focus on being more authentic with your feelings.

You don’t want to mope all the time, but you don’t have to pretend to be something you aren’t.

You may discover that the less time you spend pretending, the happier you will be.

Remember that you will not hurt or disappoint your family or friends if you stop pretending you are happy.

You are not protecting them by faking it; you are only hurting yourself.

They will not stop caring about you if you are honest about how you feel. , It is okay if you are unhappy.

Everyone goes through times in their lives where they are not happy.

This may be due to a change in circumstances, emotional upheaval, or something else.

Accept that it’s okay to be unhappy at certain times.Some unhappy periods may last for weeks or months.

However, if you are unhappy for longer than this, it may mean that you have a more serious problem.

About the Author

A

Angela Jackson

Writer and educator with a focus on practical cooking knowledge.

60 articles
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