How to Fake Sick and Miss School Successfully
Tell your parents a day or two before you plan to miss school you are feeling bad., That night, set your alarm for 2:00 AM., As long as they did not accuse you of faking it the night before, wake up later than you usually do in the morning., If they...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Tell your parents a day or two before you plan to miss school you are feeling bad.
If you want them to think you have strep throat, for example, whine every once in a while about your throat burning.
Don't be afraid to get descriptive.
Don't mention it too often however, or they will be on to you.
For the stomach bug, don't eat as much as you normally do and sneak food later, etc.
If you want to really make them think you are getting sick, when they are watching, rub your eyes, then find a spot to curl up a ball.
Complain you can't sleep in mid/late afternoon. -
Step 2: That night
Make sure it isn't loud enough to wake up your parents though.
Turn on a lamp and shine the light on your forehead close to the skin for a minute or two.
Then quietly get a washcloth hot and press to your face/forehead until it is no longer hot.
Now, go wake up either your mom or dad to tell them in a whiny voice you feel really bad.
Talk slowly as well for a realistic effect.
Ask them if they have any medicine you can take.
If they give you some, pretend to take it.
If they insist upon watching, just keep the pill between your teeth and try not to get it wet with spit so you can spit it in the trash without it dissolving in your mouth , If your parent comes to wake you up, sit up and tell them you feel really bad again.
Act weak, pitiful and sad.
If they don't come to wake you, slowly make your way downstairs or to where they are.
Rub your face and forehead while you are in front of them and lay down whenever you get the chance.
Either moan or tell them how bad you feel.
Focus on infectious things that they won't want you spreading at school (like sore throat, fatigue, nausea or stomach complaints secondary to infections that might not carry a fever but may make teachers and students want to keep you at home where you can't infect everyone else around you).
If they tell you to go back to bed, protest.
Tell them you have a test or something you don't want to miss.
If they either accuse you of faking it or tell you that you can't miss more school, wait a second before you feign more symptoms so they don't sense you are pulling their leg.
Ask them to repeat themselves and act confused--then emphasize you are confused and start to lay down and curl up somewhere Toss and turn and cry/whine quietly.
It seems pathetic, but it works.
If they tell you to go back to bed but tell you they will take you to the doctor, agree, groan, and go back to bed.
Never ever smile.
If you start to feel happy, think of something very sad so you can control it. , Always whine.
There are no specific directions for the doctor's office, honestly.
Just make sure you never smile, laugh, or talk as much as you normally would. -
Step 3: set your alarm for 2:00 AM.
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Step 4: As long as they did not accuse you of faking it the night before
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Step 5: wake up later than you usually do in the morning.
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Step 6: If they take you to the doctor's office
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Step 7: groan and rub your face a lot.
Detailed Guide
If you want them to think you have strep throat, for example, whine every once in a while about your throat burning.
Don't be afraid to get descriptive.
Don't mention it too often however, or they will be on to you.
For the stomach bug, don't eat as much as you normally do and sneak food later, etc.
If you want to really make them think you are getting sick, when they are watching, rub your eyes, then find a spot to curl up a ball.
Complain you can't sleep in mid/late afternoon.
Make sure it isn't loud enough to wake up your parents though.
Turn on a lamp and shine the light on your forehead close to the skin for a minute or two.
Then quietly get a washcloth hot and press to your face/forehead until it is no longer hot.
Now, go wake up either your mom or dad to tell them in a whiny voice you feel really bad.
Talk slowly as well for a realistic effect.
Ask them if they have any medicine you can take.
If they give you some, pretend to take it.
If they insist upon watching, just keep the pill between your teeth and try not to get it wet with spit so you can spit it in the trash without it dissolving in your mouth , If your parent comes to wake you up, sit up and tell them you feel really bad again.
Act weak, pitiful and sad.
If they don't come to wake you, slowly make your way downstairs or to where they are.
Rub your face and forehead while you are in front of them and lay down whenever you get the chance.
Either moan or tell them how bad you feel.
Focus on infectious things that they won't want you spreading at school (like sore throat, fatigue, nausea or stomach complaints secondary to infections that might not carry a fever but may make teachers and students want to keep you at home where you can't infect everyone else around you).
If they tell you to go back to bed, protest.
Tell them you have a test or something you don't want to miss.
If they either accuse you of faking it or tell you that you can't miss more school, wait a second before you feign more symptoms so they don't sense you are pulling their leg.
Ask them to repeat themselves and act confused--then emphasize you are confused and start to lay down and curl up somewhere Toss and turn and cry/whine quietly.
It seems pathetic, but it works.
If they tell you to go back to bed but tell you they will take you to the doctor, agree, groan, and go back to bed.
Never ever smile.
If you start to feel happy, think of something very sad so you can control it. , Always whine.
There are no specific directions for the doctor's office, honestly.
Just make sure you never smile, laugh, or talk as much as you normally would.
About the Author
Jean Moore
Specializes in breaking down complex home improvement topics into simple steps.
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