How to Communicate to Evoke Admiration
Overcome common errors., Learn to organize your thoughts., Involve the listener in the conversation., Practice persuasive communication., Ask questions., Use compassionate communication.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Overcome common errors.
These are the some of the pitfalls to avoid and manage in order to evoke a response and admiration from listeners:
Self-consciousness.
To be a good conversationalist, be a great listener.
Be genuinely interested in what the other person has to say, ask the right questions (because we genuinely want to know more) and presto, people will laud you as great communicators! It’s often your own self-consciousness that makes you tongue-tied and awkward.
When you are so preoccupied with what intelligent idea to share next, you can barely concentrate on listening to and understanding the other party.
Non-empathy.
The other block to good communication is non-empathy.
If you are sometimes so intent on putting your ideas across, you may forget to be sensitive or empathic toward the other person.
Is the person in a rush, or does he or she have other matters on his or her mind? Lack of clarity.
This comes from a lack of clarity in your thoughts as well as your verbal communication.
It starts from your thoughts: are you quite clear in your mind as to what the message is that you wish to convey? From there, move on to effective choice of words.
Some people may have a language problem: they may be thinking in their mother language, say Mandarin or Punjabi, and trying to express their ideas in a language they are not comfortable with, say English. -
Step 2: Learn to organize your thoughts.
Before making an important presentation, list down the points you want to make in a logical sense.
If language is a challenge, then write your ideas down in proper sentences and ask a friend to go through these for you.
That's not to say you should read from your paper or memorize the “speech” but just writing it down and reading it a few times will help you a great deal in putting your message across. , It should be about what he or she wants to listen rather than what you want to convey.
Many people think as long as they speak fluently, they are good communicators.
Not so, as those of you who have had to listen to someone go on and on about themselves, will testify.
They may be such eloquent speakers, and even entertaining at times, but there’s only so much we can take in a one-way communication.
Some of you have probably been in a situation where you just wish you were somewhere else after 20 minutes! , This takes place when the person we are communicating with, understands what we want to say, feels what we are feeling and is then motivated to take action on what we have said. , One skill that can help you move from effective to persuasive communication is that of asking questions.
This is a powerful skill that once mastered, will indeed help you see immediate results in your daily communication – be it sales, presentation of ideas, talking to your friends or simply getting your child to do what you want. , Give your full attention to the person or persons you are with.
Listen carefully to what has been said.
Summarize back in your own terms.
Seek, most of all, to get to the heart of what the other person is saying and conveying; things left unsaid are also part of the conversation.
What is the other person really trying to say? What perspective are they coming from, what about it makes you feel other or different, and how can you compassionately reconcile your two positions? Remember that everyone does it tough some of the time, and it may just be that you're dealing with someone going through things that makes it hard for them to listen well but they will appreciate your ready understanding. -
Step 3: Involve the listener in the conversation.
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Step 4: Practice persuasive communication.
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Step 5: Ask questions.
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Step 6: Use compassionate communication.
Detailed Guide
These are the some of the pitfalls to avoid and manage in order to evoke a response and admiration from listeners:
Self-consciousness.
To be a good conversationalist, be a great listener.
Be genuinely interested in what the other person has to say, ask the right questions (because we genuinely want to know more) and presto, people will laud you as great communicators! It’s often your own self-consciousness that makes you tongue-tied and awkward.
When you are so preoccupied with what intelligent idea to share next, you can barely concentrate on listening to and understanding the other party.
Non-empathy.
The other block to good communication is non-empathy.
If you are sometimes so intent on putting your ideas across, you may forget to be sensitive or empathic toward the other person.
Is the person in a rush, or does he or she have other matters on his or her mind? Lack of clarity.
This comes from a lack of clarity in your thoughts as well as your verbal communication.
It starts from your thoughts: are you quite clear in your mind as to what the message is that you wish to convey? From there, move on to effective choice of words.
Some people may have a language problem: they may be thinking in their mother language, say Mandarin or Punjabi, and trying to express their ideas in a language they are not comfortable with, say English.
Before making an important presentation, list down the points you want to make in a logical sense.
If language is a challenge, then write your ideas down in proper sentences and ask a friend to go through these for you.
That's not to say you should read from your paper or memorize the “speech” but just writing it down and reading it a few times will help you a great deal in putting your message across. , It should be about what he or she wants to listen rather than what you want to convey.
Many people think as long as they speak fluently, they are good communicators.
Not so, as those of you who have had to listen to someone go on and on about themselves, will testify.
They may be such eloquent speakers, and even entertaining at times, but there’s only so much we can take in a one-way communication.
Some of you have probably been in a situation where you just wish you were somewhere else after 20 minutes! , This takes place when the person we are communicating with, understands what we want to say, feels what we are feeling and is then motivated to take action on what we have said. , One skill that can help you move from effective to persuasive communication is that of asking questions.
This is a powerful skill that once mastered, will indeed help you see immediate results in your daily communication – be it sales, presentation of ideas, talking to your friends or simply getting your child to do what you want. , Give your full attention to the person or persons you are with.
Listen carefully to what has been said.
Summarize back in your own terms.
Seek, most of all, to get to the heart of what the other person is saying and conveying; things left unsaid are also part of the conversation.
What is the other person really trying to say? What perspective are they coming from, what about it makes you feel other or different, and how can you compassionately reconcile your two positions? Remember that everyone does it tough some of the time, and it may just be that you're dealing with someone going through things that makes it hard for them to listen well but they will appreciate your ready understanding.
About the Author
Donna Hernandez
Creates helpful guides on pet care to inspire and educate readers.
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