How to Tell Your Date You Have a Child (for Single Mothers)
Don’t allow the pressures of dating become overbearing to you., Be honest with who you are., Be forward., Carry on a positive attitude., Listen to him., Talk honestly about the situation., Touch on other subjects throughout conversation., Breathe.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Don’t allow the pressures of dating become overbearing to you.
It is all right if your friends get dressed up for their dates.
Take time to relax and take care of you first.
Do not date until you are ready and comfortable.
Don’t allow yourself to feel guilty about dating.
You are not leaving your children behind.
It is more than normal to want more than a sit down on a couch with your child watching cartoons.
Your child is priority but the need of companionship is perfectly fine and you are deserving of it. -
Step 2: Be honest with who you are.
As a single mother, it can be noted that there may be the need to escape from who you are.
We have all heard of men who refuse to be with single mothers.
No person wants to be refused or turned down so it is a natural feeling to want to hide a part of yourself and, at times, your own children.
Knowing that there are men out there who will be accepting of you should stick with you as you begin dating.
Let's face it, when you are on that future date eventually the phone will ring, and the sitter will be calling about your child’s tummy ache. (Well hopefully not.) In any case, have no shame because “mom” is the title that you possess so accept it as you date. , Letting him know upfront who you are and the child in your life is perfectly okay.
Waiting to tell him may not be in your best interest.
The first couple of dates are about getting to know the other person.
Remember, you are not telling him your life story.
Simply, you are letting him know the person he is engaging himself with.
Having him fall for you first before you mention that you have a child may not be as beneficial to you as it would be for him getting to know you.
Wouldn’t you want to know up front if this guy is accepting of you as a single mother? On your end, you want a man who will want to be with you and your child.
The ideal man should be genuine and honest.
If he walks away after the mention of a “baby” it is okay, then he wasn’t meant for you. , There is more to children than the madness that can be carried on a daily basis.
For those who do not have children, the pre-notion may be that the little ones give gray hairs and drive parents up walls.
Although fairly true, having a child is a beautiful thing.
There is beauty in having children and the experiences that are shared and let him know this too.
Embrace your life as it is and let him know that in time it can be a life that he can share into also. , His reaction may be positively surprising to you.
He may ask more about your child/children.
There may be some men who may not be interested in dating a woman with a child and that is normal.
For any man, dating a single mother is different than dating a single young lady.
For your sake, if the man is not interested he may not have been the one.
Try to listen to his views and his reaction. , Realize what this means for him as well as yourself.
There are post-challenges ahead when dating and having children.
Although nothing to fear, it will be new for him.
Briefly getting an idea of how it could work is a step into the right direction. , Your child does not have to be the highlight of your date.
Let him know that you have other interests and other things on your mind.
Get to know him.
A simple mention of children is enough.
There should not be any need to continue further with “kid subjects” unless you want to.
Once kids are introduced to your date or new man in your life, you may leave your child / children vulnerable. , You did it.
Whether he is in good standing with the package deal and wants another date or not.
You held the confidence to tell him. -
Step 3: Be forward.
-
Step 4: Carry on a positive attitude.
-
Step 5: Listen to him.
-
Step 6: Talk honestly about the situation.
-
Step 7: Touch on other subjects throughout conversation.
-
Step 8: Breathe.
Detailed Guide
It is all right if your friends get dressed up for their dates.
Take time to relax and take care of you first.
Do not date until you are ready and comfortable.
Don’t allow yourself to feel guilty about dating.
You are not leaving your children behind.
It is more than normal to want more than a sit down on a couch with your child watching cartoons.
Your child is priority but the need of companionship is perfectly fine and you are deserving of it.
As a single mother, it can be noted that there may be the need to escape from who you are.
We have all heard of men who refuse to be with single mothers.
No person wants to be refused or turned down so it is a natural feeling to want to hide a part of yourself and, at times, your own children.
Knowing that there are men out there who will be accepting of you should stick with you as you begin dating.
Let's face it, when you are on that future date eventually the phone will ring, and the sitter will be calling about your child’s tummy ache. (Well hopefully not.) In any case, have no shame because “mom” is the title that you possess so accept it as you date. , Letting him know upfront who you are and the child in your life is perfectly okay.
Waiting to tell him may not be in your best interest.
The first couple of dates are about getting to know the other person.
Remember, you are not telling him your life story.
Simply, you are letting him know the person he is engaging himself with.
Having him fall for you first before you mention that you have a child may not be as beneficial to you as it would be for him getting to know you.
Wouldn’t you want to know up front if this guy is accepting of you as a single mother? On your end, you want a man who will want to be with you and your child.
The ideal man should be genuine and honest.
If he walks away after the mention of a “baby” it is okay, then he wasn’t meant for you. , There is more to children than the madness that can be carried on a daily basis.
For those who do not have children, the pre-notion may be that the little ones give gray hairs and drive parents up walls.
Although fairly true, having a child is a beautiful thing.
There is beauty in having children and the experiences that are shared and let him know this too.
Embrace your life as it is and let him know that in time it can be a life that he can share into also. , His reaction may be positively surprising to you.
He may ask more about your child/children.
There may be some men who may not be interested in dating a woman with a child and that is normal.
For any man, dating a single mother is different than dating a single young lady.
For your sake, if the man is not interested he may not have been the one.
Try to listen to his views and his reaction. , Realize what this means for him as well as yourself.
There are post-challenges ahead when dating and having children.
Although nothing to fear, it will be new for him.
Briefly getting an idea of how it could work is a step into the right direction. , Your child does not have to be the highlight of your date.
Let him know that you have other interests and other things on your mind.
Get to know him.
A simple mention of children is enough.
There should not be any need to continue further with “kid subjects” unless you want to.
Once kids are introduced to your date or new man in your life, you may leave your child / children vulnerable. , You did it.
Whether he is in good standing with the package deal and wants another date or not.
You held the confidence to tell him.
About the Author
Beverly Collins
Professional writer focused on creating easy-to-follow home improvement tutorials.
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