How to Ask a Shy Girl Out
Hang around her more often., Talk together., Get to know her friends., Notice the little signs that indicate her interest in you., Flirt a little., Be confident in yourself., Practice what you will say in the mirror., Approach her coolly., Start...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Hang around her more often.
The way to a shy girl's heart is to break through her shyness barrier.
And that's going to take getting to know her rather than fronting up and asking her out straight away.
Find ways that she seems comfortable with that let the two of you spend some time together without strings attached.
This could be any one or a combination of the following:
Be study buddies.
Pick each other's brains for ideas and solutions to schoolwork or college assignments.
Sit with her in the cafeteria at lunch and simply chat about everyday life.
Compliment her on her reading choices and talk about books together.
Visit her performance when she is playing an instrument, hitting a ball or dancing up a whirl.
Be supportive by being in the audience and coming up and congratulating her afterward. -
Step 2: Talk together.
Do what you can to find chatting opportunities, be they in the hallway, in the library (quietly!) or on the way home from school or college.
Perhaps you catch the same bus home or maybe you share the same walkover from class to class––whatever the case, seize the opportunities to have small talk with her.
And when you do:
Ask her questions to help draw her out of her shell.
Be receptive to her conversation.
Be a great listener and be supportive of the things she tells you.
Don't interrupt her.
Let her say what she wishes to say, at her pace.
Talk only a little about yourself.
She can find out more later, and a little mystery is a great thing. , They will be a useful source of support and information as things become more serious.
They can also serve as a source of reassurance to her, helping her to realize that you mean well and are worth letting down her barriers for. , She's probably not going to tell you but she'll be giving away some signals if she does like you.
If she does like you, she might:
Blush a bit:
For example, when you walk up to her and say a casual "hi!"
she smiles, nods, blushes, and murmurs something about getting to class, then hurries in opposite direction.
Stare a little:
When she sees you in the hallway, she will quicken her pace and turn away but look back just before she turns the corner and meets your gaze.
Glance at you:
If you are in the same class as her, watch her out of the corner of your eye.
Don't stare though, you don't want to come on too strong! Chances are she'll be doing the same thing, and quickly turn back to her work if she meets your gaze.
Act nervous:
She blushes a lot when you are near her or has numerous little smiles that fade quickly.
Chews her bottom lip, and acts flustered if you talk to her.
Makes eye contact:
Eventually, she might be brave enough to meet your eyes, give a small smile, then look away. , Break the touch barrier and touch her shoulder, lightly tease-punch her, patting her back after something impressive.
Compliment her a little, but not too much.
Try hugging her that Friday before you go. , If you're not confident in yourself, how can she be confident in both of you together in a relationship? Look at yourself in a positive way and believe that you are Mr.
Right. , Imagine that you are the shy girl that you want to ask out.
Figure out a comfortable way to ask her out without making yourself feel shy or embarrassed.
Don't overdo it though, you don't want a long speech just a cute conversation. , Don't walk up to her like you're about to tell her something that will change her life.
Act like you normally do when you are starting a conversation with her. , Tell her she looks beautiful in that top or that her eyes are gorgeous.
It may seem a little cheesy, but this gives her the hint that you are interested and makes her feel like she knows what's coming. , Say something like "Hey maybe if you aren't busy, we can hang out later." or whatever you want to do with her.
Say this with your best smile and while slowly getting close to her. , If she says no, simply back down and say maybe another time.
If she says yes, act excited and make plans.
Either way, you shouldn't act depressed because this will surely make her even more shy around you. -
Step 3: Get to know her friends.
-
Step 4: Notice the little signs that indicate her interest in you.
-
Step 5: Flirt a little.
-
Step 6: Be confident in yourself.
-
Step 7: Practice what you will say in the mirror.
-
Step 8: Approach her coolly.
-
Step 9: Start with a compliment.
-
Step 10: Ask her out.
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Step 11: React to her answer.
Detailed Guide
The way to a shy girl's heart is to break through her shyness barrier.
And that's going to take getting to know her rather than fronting up and asking her out straight away.
Find ways that she seems comfortable with that let the two of you spend some time together without strings attached.
This could be any one or a combination of the following:
Be study buddies.
Pick each other's brains for ideas and solutions to schoolwork or college assignments.
Sit with her in the cafeteria at lunch and simply chat about everyday life.
Compliment her on her reading choices and talk about books together.
Visit her performance when she is playing an instrument, hitting a ball or dancing up a whirl.
Be supportive by being in the audience and coming up and congratulating her afterward.
Do what you can to find chatting opportunities, be they in the hallway, in the library (quietly!) or on the way home from school or college.
Perhaps you catch the same bus home or maybe you share the same walkover from class to class––whatever the case, seize the opportunities to have small talk with her.
And when you do:
Ask her questions to help draw her out of her shell.
Be receptive to her conversation.
Be a great listener and be supportive of the things she tells you.
Don't interrupt her.
Let her say what she wishes to say, at her pace.
Talk only a little about yourself.
She can find out more later, and a little mystery is a great thing. , They will be a useful source of support and information as things become more serious.
They can also serve as a source of reassurance to her, helping her to realize that you mean well and are worth letting down her barriers for. , She's probably not going to tell you but she'll be giving away some signals if she does like you.
If she does like you, she might:
Blush a bit:
For example, when you walk up to her and say a casual "hi!"
she smiles, nods, blushes, and murmurs something about getting to class, then hurries in opposite direction.
Stare a little:
When she sees you in the hallway, she will quicken her pace and turn away but look back just before she turns the corner and meets your gaze.
Glance at you:
If you are in the same class as her, watch her out of the corner of your eye.
Don't stare though, you don't want to come on too strong! Chances are she'll be doing the same thing, and quickly turn back to her work if she meets your gaze.
Act nervous:
She blushes a lot when you are near her or has numerous little smiles that fade quickly.
Chews her bottom lip, and acts flustered if you talk to her.
Makes eye contact:
Eventually, she might be brave enough to meet your eyes, give a small smile, then look away. , Break the touch barrier and touch her shoulder, lightly tease-punch her, patting her back after something impressive.
Compliment her a little, but not too much.
Try hugging her that Friday before you go. , If you're not confident in yourself, how can she be confident in both of you together in a relationship? Look at yourself in a positive way and believe that you are Mr.
Right. , Imagine that you are the shy girl that you want to ask out.
Figure out a comfortable way to ask her out without making yourself feel shy or embarrassed.
Don't overdo it though, you don't want a long speech just a cute conversation. , Don't walk up to her like you're about to tell her something that will change her life.
Act like you normally do when you are starting a conversation with her. , Tell her she looks beautiful in that top or that her eyes are gorgeous.
It may seem a little cheesy, but this gives her the hint that you are interested and makes her feel like she knows what's coming. , Say something like "Hey maybe if you aren't busy, we can hang out later." or whatever you want to do with her.
Say this with your best smile and while slowly getting close to her. , If she says no, simply back down and say maybe another time.
If she says yes, act excited and make plans.
Either way, you shouldn't act depressed because this will surely make her even more shy around you.
About the Author
Patricia Murphy
With a background in education and learning, Patricia Murphy brings 7 years of hands-on experience to every article. Patricia believes in making complex topics accessible to everyone.
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