How to Avoid Being Annoying While Around Your Friends
Find interesting conversation topics., Know when to be quiet., Talk about what you know, but don’t be a know-it-all., Listen., Say what you mean, but do so respectfully.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Find interesting conversation topics.
Talk about things you think would be of interest to your group of friends.
Even though you may find one topic interesting, keep in mind that your friends might not, so avoid monopolizing the conversation.
Current events, favorite movies or celebrities can all be good options.For example, if your friends are big football fans, you could ask, “What did you think of the game last night?” Or you could talk about a recent shared activity: “Nicole’s party was great, wasn’t it?” Don’t gossip.
While most people enjoy gossiping about other people, it’s not polite and can backfire on you pretty easily.
Keep people’s secrets and don’t talk about another person behind their back.
If you have a significant other, don’t overshare about your relationship.
It makes other people who aren’t in a relationship feel bad, and most people get tired of hearing you talk about it after a while. -
Step 2: Know when to be quiet.
Sometimes people can get caught up in the excitement of hanging out with their friends and forget to let others get a word in edgewise.
Make sure you are giving others space to talk and avoid holding court for too long.
Know when you are monopolizing the conversation and people are becoming bored.
Good indicators are people avoiding eye contact with you, beginning to turn away, or chat amongst themselves.Don’t talk just to talk or fill dead air.
Learn to be comfortable with silence.
If silence makes you uncomfortable, you might want to look into learning meditation or spending some time alone with your thoughts in silence.Walk or study without headphones or background music. , Even if you truly are the expert in a particular topic among your circle of friends, do not act that way.
No one likes to be corrected or lectured at.
Everyone has something to contribute to the conversation, even a beginner.
Don’t brag about your accomplishments.
If people are interested, they will ask you about them.
If you don’t know about a topic, don’t pretend that you do.
Ask questions instead.
People love to share their knowledge about something they care about.You could say, “I think it’s so cool that you’re interested in artificial intelligence.
I know a little bit about it, but not much.
Could you recommend any good websites about it?” , One of the best things you can do for a friend is listen to them.
Listening helps strengthen your friendship and build empathy.
If you’re prone to talking too much, ask your friends questions about themselves.
Most people love to talk about themselves.
Ask open-ended questions instead of yes/no questions.
For example, “Tell me about your trip to Spain!” is better than “Did you have fun in Spain?”If your friend comes to you with a problem, don’t jump in and give them advice on how to fix it (unless they ask for it, of course).
Just listen to them and say things like, “Wow, that sounds really hard.
I’m sorry you’re dealing with that.” Sometimes people just need to unload, and having someone to listen to them helps them feel better., Don’t dance around the point.
People cannot read minds, and if you expect them to read yours, it can be extremely frustrating to be around you.
Sometimes it can be difficult to find the courage to speak your truth.
It might help to think if you will look back on this situation with regret if you didn’t speak up.
If someone hurts your feelings, call them on it.
Say, “It really upset me when you said I suck at math.
I studied really hard for that test,” instead of withdrawing into yourself and not telling people what is wrong. “When you did/said this, it made me feel like this” is a good formula for expressing hurt feelings.
It lets the other person know how their behavior made you feel without them feeling defensive. -
Step 3: Talk about what you know
-
Step 4: but don’t be a know-it-all.
-
Step 5: Listen.
-
Step 6: Say what you mean
-
Step 7: but do so respectfully.
Detailed Guide
Talk about things you think would be of interest to your group of friends.
Even though you may find one topic interesting, keep in mind that your friends might not, so avoid monopolizing the conversation.
Current events, favorite movies or celebrities can all be good options.For example, if your friends are big football fans, you could ask, “What did you think of the game last night?” Or you could talk about a recent shared activity: “Nicole’s party was great, wasn’t it?” Don’t gossip.
While most people enjoy gossiping about other people, it’s not polite and can backfire on you pretty easily.
Keep people’s secrets and don’t talk about another person behind their back.
If you have a significant other, don’t overshare about your relationship.
It makes other people who aren’t in a relationship feel bad, and most people get tired of hearing you talk about it after a while.
Sometimes people can get caught up in the excitement of hanging out with their friends and forget to let others get a word in edgewise.
Make sure you are giving others space to talk and avoid holding court for too long.
Know when you are monopolizing the conversation and people are becoming bored.
Good indicators are people avoiding eye contact with you, beginning to turn away, or chat amongst themselves.Don’t talk just to talk or fill dead air.
Learn to be comfortable with silence.
If silence makes you uncomfortable, you might want to look into learning meditation or spending some time alone with your thoughts in silence.Walk or study without headphones or background music. , Even if you truly are the expert in a particular topic among your circle of friends, do not act that way.
No one likes to be corrected or lectured at.
Everyone has something to contribute to the conversation, even a beginner.
Don’t brag about your accomplishments.
If people are interested, they will ask you about them.
If you don’t know about a topic, don’t pretend that you do.
Ask questions instead.
People love to share their knowledge about something they care about.You could say, “I think it’s so cool that you’re interested in artificial intelligence.
I know a little bit about it, but not much.
Could you recommend any good websites about it?” , One of the best things you can do for a friend is listen to them.
Listening helps strengthen your friendship and build empathy.
If you’re prone to talking too much, ask your friends questions about themselves.
Most people love to talk about themselves.
Ask open-ended questions instead of yes/no questions.
For example, “Tell me about your trip to Spain!” is better than “Did you have fun in Spain?”If your friend comes to you with a problem, don’t jump in and give them advice on how to fix it (unless they ask for it, of course).
Just listen to them and say things like, “Wow, that sounds really hard.
I’m sorry you’re dealing with that.” Sometimes people just need to unload, and having someone to listen to them helps them feel better., Don’t dance around the point.
People cannot read minds, and if you expect them to read yours, it can be extremely frustrating to be around you.
Sometimes it can be difficult to find the courage to speak your truth.
It might help to think if you will look back on this situation with regret if you didn’t speak up.
If someone hurts your feelings, call them on it.
Say, “It really upset me when you said I suck at math.
I studied really hard for that test,” instead of withdrawing into yourself and not telling people what is wrong. “When you did/said this, it made me feel like this” is a good formula for expressing hurt feelings.
It lets the other person know how their behavior made you feel without them feeling defensive.
About the Author
Dennis Henderson
Enthusiastic about teaching home improvement techniques through clear, step-by-step guides.
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